13 year old wrongly accused of shoplifting Weetabix

[nojellybabies]

He went to Tesos to buy Weetabix and butter. This is what he said:

As he put the Weetabix in his bag a female employee came up to him and challenged him saying “what are you doing with that Weetabix?” She called the manager over who said “what’sgoing On?” My son (who hates having to explain himself to strangers and struggles with this sort of thing) said “did you think I was stealing it?” . She replied “yes, you have to use a basket” then moved away.

He paid at self service. As he walked out of the shop the manger called him back and there, in the lobby, in front of a crowd of bystanders took his bag and searched it then demanded the receipt for the Weetabix. Which my son produced. The manager said “sorry you can go”. Interested bystanders told him to go home and tell his family to complain.

He was seriously distraught. Several episodes of Father Ted later he is still feeling humiliated and as if everyone in town now thinks he is a criminal. Even the “my lovely horse” episode only helped a bit.:(

I’ve spoken to the general complaints line and asked the man there (who started apologising when I said the word “Weetabix”-I mean who the hell shoplifts Weetabix?) to get the shop to write to my son to apologise.

I haven’t marched down there because I don’t want to embarrass him further. I am trying to stress all the things he did right to him.

Something is surely wrong with the training here? AIBU?
And Weetabix?!? admittedly he bought some butter too but all the same...

I put items in my own bag before paying - it's so that I don't end up buying more than I can carry.

No one has ever questioned me, but then I'm not a teenage boy.

Poor DS - I hope he's feeling better now.

This is a non event. He should have used a basket or carried the items. The shop girl wasn’t in the wrong for challenging his suspicious behaviour and the manager apologised when he realised he was wrong.

SofiaAmes but I don't lick my supermarket basket
I put my shopping in, I remove it at the checkout then bag it up into my plastic bags ( which I don't wash regularly!!!)
Do you have health anxiety?

troubles you asked why anyone would not use the shopping baskets and I told you why in a polite and rational response. I'm not sure why you think that suggesting that I have health anxiety because I do things differently than you do is an appropriate response. As it happens, I don't, but I do have a severely ill child who spent much of his childhood in and out of hospitals from "little" infections that wouldn't mean much of anything to a healthy person, so yes, I am extra sensitive to things that are riddled with bacteria. So sorry if that makes you uncomfortable. Luckily, I live in Los Angeles
where it's very common for shoppers to use their own bags, and no one suggests that someone is mentally ill for doing so.

If I saw someone putting goods in their bag I'd think they were nicking it too.

To all of the people saying that nobody would shoplift weetabix, I recently flew out of Heathrow and there was a man next to me in the departure lounge. He was sorting his belongings and unzipped his cabin bag to reveal...a huge box of Weetabix. No room in the bag for anything else. Maybe it has street value.

I would think someone was shoplifting if they put an item in their bag before paying. That is exactly what a shoplifter would do.

As to no shoplifters would ever steal Weetabix. Our local Sainsbury's is near to a big comprehensice school and kids regularly shoplift there - sometimes just for a dare/jape. My son's friends got caught and they had random stuff - like cheese - not stuff they really wanted. (Happily DS is no longer friends with them). Also, when I worked in a large chain store people got caught nicking some very odd items. So I don't think you can judge on the basis of the product.

twelve pages and not one mention of RIchard Madeley's "front of the trolley" trick?
it was only resting in my account the trolley, father

Luckily, I live in Los Angeles Ah

I once shoplifted a bag of kitty litter.

I was pregnant and had taken the kids to the supermarket and they were being utter horrors. I paid at the self service till, got back to the car, kids in their car seats nice and quiet eating a sweet each and then I found the bag in the baby seat of the trolley.

There was no way I was getting the kids back out of their seats and back to the supermarket to pay. So, I just put it in the car and drove off. I'm not proud of it, but fuck it.

I thought Richard Madeley "forgot" to pay and just walked out with a whole trolley load of shopping or something.

Anthony W-T was doing something dodgy with the self-service tills.

Both were caught in Tesco.

He was being unreasonable, and the shop staff were right to see what was going on.

If you’re going to insist on putting items you haven’t paid for in a bag and not a basket, trolley or your hands, you should expect that sometimes, staff are going to think you’re shoplifting.

I think the onus for his public humiliation is on you to be honest, considering you’ve taught him to behave like a shoplifter even though he isn’t one.

*He was being unreasonable, and the shop staff were right to see what was going on.

If you’re going to insist on putting items you haven’t paid for in a bag and not a basket, trolley or your hands, you should expect that sometimes, staff are going to think you’re shoplifting.

I think the onus for his public humiliation is on you to be honest, considering you’ve taught him to behave like a shoplifter even though he isn’t one.*

Nonsense. The moment he left the store without paying would have been when he behaved like a shoplifter. Up until then he was behaving like a shopper.

*bold fail

But they had reasonable reason just to simply double check. He produced the recipet and went on his way. Why is that an issue?

When security tags haven’t been taken off in the past I have shown the receipt and then gone on my way. Should I have kicked up a fuss about how humiliating it was or simply realised it was just them doing their job?

Not talking about your situation op...but I wonder, let's say a young teenager or child was actually shoplifting food... what would the police do? I hope a child stealing food would not be arrested or prosecuted but would actually be referred to social services and helped? If a child was actually stealing food, it could be because they were being neglected or living in poverty.

It's absolutely not true that they cannot arrest you until you leave the shop. That may be an individual shop's policy, but legally they can stop you at any point that they feel there is sufficient evidence that you were intending to steal goods. Technically they could arrest you as soon as you put it in your bag, but it's hard to get a conviction as there isn't sufficient proof. Most shops will stop someone as soon as they have passed the tills without paying.

I understand why the Op is upset (and extremely unlikely to come back to this thread), but Tesco acted properly in this case. They will probably send her a voucher and apology if she kicks up enough fuss though. It's cheaper and easier for them to do so in the long run.

YABU, he was going in for weetabix and butter, he has two hands and is more than capable of carrying the two items in his hands (balancing the butter on the weetabix box if necessary) until the checkout. There was no need for him to put the items into a bag.

I work in a supermarket and I have never seen anyone put items into their own bags rather than use a trolley/basket unless they were a) using the scan and go system (and then they have the scanner so it is obvious and most people still use a trolley as they can organize their bags easier if they don't have to carry them) b) a parent using a buggy and have put items on the hood/in the basket underneath because they couldn't manage the buggy and carry a basket c) were elderly/infirm and using a Walker-shopper.

Equally, if I am knowingly going in for only one or two items I would never put the items in my bag before I pay unless they were too heavy/large/awkwardly shaped to carry comfortably and even then I'd only put them in a bag at the point I needed to (eg carrying bag of cat food, bottle of water and milk in my arms I would only put one or all of them into a bag if I needed to grab some bread and didn't want it getting squashed)

The point of baskets and trolleys are partly for customer convenience but mostly for store security - if items are in a trolley then it is easy to see what the customer has and if they have put all of their items on the belt. By putting items into a personal bag (ie not an empty shopping bag) checkout staff can't see if every item has been removed from the bag or whether the other items in the bag are the customers personal items or other stock they intend to "forget to pay for".

In our store if any customer is seen putting items into a bag and they aren't carrying a scan and go handset we are trained to inform security so that they can keep an eye on the customer in question because they may be perfectly innocent but they could equally be shoplifting and hoping that nobody will notice they put 10 items into their bag but only emptied 8 onto the checkout ...