To ask about the worst wedding you’ve been too

[Whereisthecoffee]

I’m planning mine and I could just ask for tips but instead I’m going to procrastinate and read stories.
Please share your stories !

stressed if you can maybe ditch the sweetie cart or ice cream thing and lay on some canapés and alcohol.

A welcome drink and a drink to toast. You could do a pimms and a non alcoholic version as a welcome drink.
A glass of Cava for the toast.

Toast-‘thank you all for coming, I’m the happiest man here. Thank you to ........ for all their help getting the wedding together. Can’t belive how lucky I am to have married ...... enjoy the day. Cheers!”

Don’t do a receiving line.

My fil did a scavenger hunt for our wedding around the orchard and village where our marquee was. Not everyone did it but those with kids loved it and it did break up the day. Maybe something like that?

I've got all the sweets here so it would just be a waste and the cart is already paid for?
I really don't have another couple of hundred to spare to add on extra drinks.
My partner will definitely not say anything

What about your dad or a friend or yourself?

My dad won't be there, none of my friends are that close to me and have drifted away.
It's gonna be full of dps friends who he hasn't seen in a year or more. I was wanting to say a few words to honour loved ones not there but I don't know if I have the guts

stressed where are you getting married? Can you stay there and do a bit of mingling/have a drink. Buy some bits from marks and Spencer’s and a few bottles of fizz? Have them in the church grounds?

You’ve obviously thought out your wedding and think it will work, so I would just leave it now and enjoy it.

You know your guests and I’m sure you have planned accordingly.

Have a lovely day!

Getting married in a hotel.
I could organise a bus for everybody and go to a nice location for photos? Maybe? I know everyone on here hates photos but it would include everyone? That would stretch the time out a bit I guess.
How I wish this thread had been about much sooner!

The one I didn't like was when we were travelling a substantial distance and had made all our arrangements for a wedding thay said ceremony and reception, but it turned out that the plan was for us to attend ceremony and EVENING reception.
We didn't go. Why take a long weekend and holiday off work to travel the day before only to be essentially told 'yeah come back in the evening'? Quite a few university friends had similar invites for that wedding. Most who weren't local didn't go.

We also went to one wedding that had a 35 minute drive between church and reception and not enough parking once we got there. Much as the day is about the couple, I do think some consideration should be shown to guests

My dad won't be there, none of my friends are that close to me and have drifted away. It's gonna be full of dps friends who he hasn't seen in a year or more.

It takes all sorts, I guess, but it seems that what you should have done is gone to a registry office as a couple, with a few people to whom you are close.

The two best weddings I've been to.

My sisters.

It was done completely on the cheap. So she borrowed a dress. They rented suits. We hand made all the decorations. The got married at their local church.

We spent the entire evening before the 'hen do' baking and pre making massive batches of food couscous and rolls and salads to go with the hog roast for the meal.

The meal was about 10 minutes away. And everyone said how wonderful it was. We over made massively on the food. And there was more than enough for everyone.

Then back to the church for the evening ceremony. My parents but enough for a few drinks for everyone behind the bar. There was a dj and a live band.

Plenty of tables and seating and games.

Oh also, at the meal, during the speeches which took about 45 minutes for all of them, we had made favours for the tables filled with Lego, quiz cards, sweets, retro penny shop toys. Everyone was building Lego and quizzing each other. (I missed out on this as I was at the top table next to the father of the groom who's a silent man)

So they scrimped on everything that didn't make it fun. And spent the money on everything that made it fun for the guests. All in was about £3000.

The second was my cousins wedding in the summer.

Beautiful country retreat. Not massively far from local places so it wasn't hard to get to.

A lot of people had rooms there. They had lawn games set up for the kids. There were endless staff everywhere for drinks.

The ceremony was about 20 minutes in total. Then we all just relaxed for an hour or so where they set up a table with endless supplies of prosecco and orange juice. They did the photos around everywhere relaxing.

Then dinner and speeches after the main course. 30 minutes tops.

Again there was ample food of good quality. And any table that had children on it were seated at the back of the room where they had left space for the kids to get down and play with toys they provided and they have colouring books and pencils on the tables.

Then it went into the evening do. The dj wasn't too loud and played lots of stuff for the kids who had an amazing time. Then for their first dance they had the children dancing around with them.

The staff set up fire pits outside with all the big comfy outdoor seating.

Everyone had an amazing time and the bride and groom spent the whole time socialising and thanking everyone for coming as it meant the world to them.

Then a massive hog roast with sides and vegetarian options was set up.

All in all, it was the best wedding I've been to. I'm sure it cost in excess of £20k. But as guests we were made to feel valued and wanted and appreciated and looked after.

10 am service and when we arrived at venue we had a four hour wait while bride and groom wandered about the place having pictures taken infront of everything imaginable. Hungry people and screaming children and small talk with randoms. The reason I hate weddings.

when we arrived at venue we had a four hour wait

Why was that not a 30 minute wait, followed by leaving? Even if you have a hotel book you can find something more enjoyable, otherwise go home.

It was a hugely expensive wedding but completely soulless. Their relationship was not good and the marriage lasted less than a year.
A lot of guests were spending time drinking in their rooms instead of in the wedding which pissed me off.

one I didn't like was when we were travelling a substantial distance and had made all our arrangements for a wedding thay said ceremony and reception, but it turned out that the plan was for us to attend ceremony and EVENING reception.

That's fucking rude of them and seems to be more and more common. Really hope you didn't send them a gift, too, because they always ask for money, too. It's, 'Spend loads of money to come and fawn over me for a sausage roll and expensive drinks later on. In between, fuck off.'

At all weddings I've been to it's been the long wait between the ceremony and the meal. One bride & groom disappeared to the hotel grounds for nearly three hours to take photos. There's only so long you can make small talk and eat canapés in a tiny conservatory and keep babies and small children entertained. In the end people were sitting/leaning about looking seriously bored and ready to chew their own arms off by the time the meals were ready.

@reflect I went over the times with the hotel, this sounds more doable but I know people won't have eaten since before the wedding so not sure what to do about that

The worst one that I went to was the first English one that I attended. A colleague of my husband's was getting married in a village church with the reception at the nearby village hall. The village which was the bride's home village had no pub or shop. The wedding was at 12 noon and the reception was at 4.30. The reception meal consisted of 1 small glass of warm white wine and a tiny piece of wedding cake. The village hall didn't even have a bar!
The evening reception started at 7 and we thought that perhaps it would be when the meal was going to be presented.
We were presented with nothing!! No food, not even a pack of crisps. Just tea, coffee or squash to drink!
Then the bride, who I had never met before until the day insulted me by grabbing my dress and saying ' I've got that dress, but I only wear it as a rag for doing the housework in '.
At that point I was so hungry and pissed off that I could have hit her.

The funniest one was one of my friends wedding. Big wedding, lovely reception. However her parents had divorced when she was around 10 yrs old and her mother was still very bitter all the years later. ( he had been having an affair, married the OW ) my friend had a good relationship with her father and he was to walk her down the aisle.
She did promise to be civil so her daughter's wedding wouldn't be spoilt.
Her mother kept her promise until the evening reception when through drink, she started yelling at the OW by the buffet table. Before anyone had a chance to stop it, my friends mother shouted ' your a bloody marriage wrecking slag' before grabbing her hair and shoving her face first into a large bowl of trifle.
I know I shouldn't laugh and I blame the alcohol, but I laughed so hard I thought I was in danger of asphyxiation.

What is it about weddings and trifles? DH went to one where trifle was served as dessert and the bride's mother decided to eat it with her hands rather than a spoon.

stressed

That sounds far better. One piece of advice I always give re: photos is that I never mind as much as long as I'm included in one photo.

I'm the last person to fuss and faff, but I always find it a bit insulting when people spend ages on permutations of group photos that don't find the time to include all guests.

Her hands? 😲 VeryLittleOwl.
She must have made a real mess.

At bil and sil's wedding there were photos of them, her family, his parents, his brothers, nieces and nephews, their friends... but not a single one including wives of bil's brothers. In fact the photographer asked me afterwards who I was because I hadn't been called to be in any photograph. Some years down the line sil made a memory board for fil featuring all the family... except me and other sil.

MIL and her sister, maybe cousin, had a row over trifle at a wedding! MIL announced that there wasn’t enough sherry in it and her sister/cousin announced MIL had always been a drinker... Trading insults ensued until FIL dragged MIl away.

Don’t have trifle at your wedding !

Friend from Uni's wedding. I didn't know a soul apart from the happy couple and did not get a plus 1 on the invite. I was single but put on a table with 3 families with young children. The parents all sat together at one end of the table and put the DC in the middle - I was parked at the other end on my own surrounded by the DC. The table was right at the back and I was facing a wall. It was utterly miserable.

Hours after wedding waiting for any food or drink. They had very long Christian evangelist ceremony. Took my child out as people were talking in tongues. All very weird!

Then there were photos. And faffing for ages. Still no food or drink.

Then they did the speeches! Which went in forever.

And then there was food. Wedding was also dry. We left.

Gosh, that sounds grim, ChristmasFairy2018.

Otoh I think Plus Ones are a bad idea. I went to a wedding where there were a lot of friends of mostly the groom. They had all brought, not girlfriends, but just any old female. One apparently had waved the invitation round the office and asked who wanted to go to a wedding. Groom had three best men who were on the top table plus the random women. In the photographs the bride admitted that she did not have a clue who these women were and never saw them again.

stressed

You’re timings sound great! Enjoy the day