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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Undateables on Channel 4

124 replies

Jamellie · 18/01/2019 10:48

Has anyone seen this?

What do you think about the whole concept of this series?

Had a discussion this morning about it and curious to know other people's views are... don't want to influence the thread so not posting what the discussion was about.... yet!

OP posts:
Mitsuki · 18/01/2019 10:58

I think it's a little bit cruel for it to be "Entertainment" Even though I know people apply to be on it and it's their choice.

It just leaves a bad taste in my mouth to be honest.

ErickBroch · 18/01/2019 11:00

I know someone who went on it (through a good friend) in the initial series and met him a couple of times after, he ended up married from it. He said all the team were very supportive, they could drop out at any point, and he didn't need it but for others who did, during editing they are able to decide what is aired and what isn't (if they felt embarrassed or didn't like something, for example).

This is only one person's view I have heard though!

MeOldBamboo · 18/01/2019 11:02

I think it’s lovely and heartwarming. Who doesn’t want to be loved? It’s full of hope that there is someone for everyone in this world.
It’s had me in tears several times because of the joy it has brought to people.

Mitsuki · 18/01/2019 11:03

during editing they are able to decide what is aired and what isn't (if they felt embarrassed or didn't like something, for example)

That makes me feel better.

knittedjest · 18/01/2019 11:04

It's an opportunity that grown adults have signed themselves up for with full informed consent. Nobody is forcing anybody to participate against their will or under duress. Nobody blinks about the 1000 dating shows for beautiful people, let the ugly people have their moment I say.

ToEarlyForDecorations · 18/01/2019 11:04

I love it, I think it's great.

It gives people who would normally not even get the first date an opportunity to really shine.

I wonder how many people have applied to be on the show ? I hope that it's given loads of people the confidence to start dating.

It's infinitely preferable (to me at least) to the load of old crap that is Love Island which, IMO, really is exploitative or Naked Dating etc.

Mitsuki · 18/01/2019 11:07

1000 dating shows for beautiful people, let the ugly people have their moment I say.

This was my issue with it. Who decides what's ugly or "undateable" it seems needlessly mean to portray them as undateable.

JudasPrudy · 18/01/2019 11:09

I think that it definitely increases awareness of disabilities. When the series started the idea of people with learning disabilities dating for example wasn't really talked about and in the circles I worked in, the service users need for love was pretty much expected to be fully met by their families. So that has changed and I think the show is part of that, which is great.

ErickBroch · 18/01/2019 11:09

Mitsuki - forgot to add, he also said there are appropriate people around all the time for editing etc such as guardians, parents, and I guess experienced advisors (?) on individual disabilities or learning difficulties. I agreed I felt really weird about it until he went on it and I learnt it all!

He didn't marry who he met on the show, but someone got in touch with him from watching it and they got married! :)

PinkHeart5914 · 18/01/2019 11:10

I think it’s very well done and everyone deserves a shot at love. The people that take part choose too and always seem to have good support from family/friends and the production team do a grand job.

Shows like take me out or naked attraction annoy me more

BloodyDisgrace · 18/01/2019 11:11

I like the participants. They seem like nice, unusual people with characters and individualities, unlike the generic mob you get on Naked Attraction. I do get sick of "trend followers" and deeply conformist people, so this programme is quite refreshing.

worridmum · 18/01/2019 11:12

They wanted to recruit volunteers from my university autism society and in the end we refused to distribute it. Due to not only the nature of the show (it meant to be a freak show like series).

But the vice president brother had been on the first series and the show was beyond appling they gave out his number to ( would be dates) whom procceded to only ridicule him. I would go into more details but it would out him and others and it is not my place to do so.

Its a disgusting concept of a show abusing very vulnerable people for laughs and lets not pretend otherwise (like benifet street is meant to help the people show as if).

You would not be allowed to run a show depicting minor people in such a fashion but disabled people are fair game apprently (i mean by picking minority cultures that deform themselves due to their culture and call them undateables and the such like).

Mitsuki · 18/01/2019 11:12

forgot to add, he also said there are appropriate people around all the time for editing etc such as guardians, parents, and I guess experienced advisors (?) on individual disabilities or learning difficulties. I agreed I felt really weird about it until he went on it and I learnt it all!

To be fair I've not watched it as my gut reaction was to think it was mean spirited to the people. But from what people are now saying it sounds like it can be a good thing. I feel better no one is taken advantage of.

I'm glad your friend had a good time on the show. Grin Thanks for telling me about it, it makes me feel better about the show now. I might watch an episode to see what it's really all about.

ashtrayheart · 18/01/2019 11:14

The only thing that annoys me is that they sometimes set the people who find social situations awkward up in a cafe type date instead of an activity and it can be difficult to watch when they struggle to find a conversation opener!

worridmum · 18/01/2019 11:14

*minority people

Billballbaggins · 18/01/2019 11:14

I think it’s a really lovely show and it’s well
done - I don’t get the impression that the show is taking advantage of the participants or anything (which, given the nature of the show could be a concern). All the episodes I’ve seen seem really positive and the participants are supported well.

MrsJayy · 18/01/2019 11:14

It shows disabled people want love companionship and a partner it shows disabled people are human. I think it is made in conjuction with a specialist dating agency,parents and carers I don't think it is exploiting anybody.

SuperNappyBaby · 18/01/2019 11:16

The name of the show is awful and cruel.

OftenHangry · 18/01/2019 11:18

It raises awareness IMHO. And that's so needed!

Many people will never in their lives encounter someone with for example tourettes or many types of disabilities but they can see, through this show and others, how it can affect lives and that these are indeed just people like anyone else with needs and wishes.

I love this show.

worridmum · 18/01/2019 11:18

Its in the exact same vein as benifet street was. The shows premise was meant to show what life was like on benifets and to help the people shown. while in reality was was poorly disguised benifet bashing show meant to ridicule people and for government propaganda.

Oblomov19 · 18/01/2019 11:19

I completely disagree with worridmum and all her views on this programme. I think all disabilities and completely respectfully dealt with. It's not s laughing stock at all. Joe public may not be aware of some of the health conditions/disabilities that the participants have, so enlightening them is good.

Jamellie · 18/01/2019 11:19

Interesting..

So my opinion is that... I am autistic and don't like the show. They have a lot of autistic people on the show and my problem was the title. 'Undateable'

It upsets me to know that I could qualify for this show,

Just my opinion but nice to see not everyone feels the same.

OP posts:
FridgeFullOfChocolate · 18/01/2019 11:21

I think it’s a heartwarming program, I often feel emotional watching it when they film their parent’s and you can see they just want their children to find love and to be happy. There are sometimes bits that are funny but I don’t think it’s done in a mean spirited way. A couple of people have got married to people who they have met on the show, which is lovely.

worridmum · 18/01/2019 11:22

I cannot believe people think it is a lovely show did you watch the first series were they had people with below 50 IQ on there when they could not fathom the ramafactions of the show and the gaurdians that signed the consent form should hang their head in shame.

MrsJayy · 18/01/2019 11:22

They drop the Un in the titles and it is a play on words thenotion a disabled or ill person isn't dateable unable to have a relationship that they are an attractive person with desires .

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