Do your teenager's bedrooms look like this?

[thingersandfumbs]

Just that really. My teenage DD lives in an utter shit pit.

So, aibu to care? For context, DP encountered our dog with a used sanitary towel in his mouth a few weeks ago, from DD's shit tip.

I'm no clean and tidy queen, I promise you that, but to me this is unacceptable. Aibu?

I thought I was bad as a teen, but actually it was pre-teen. By 13, I had mastered tidying up. If either of my DS ever had a room in that state, their ex-military father would probably launch most of it out the window, and I wouldn’t be standing in his way. That is beyond revolting.

Fuck me that is bad. How on earth can she feel relaxed or at ease in that shit pit. 🤮

Stop doing it for her! Tell her no visitors until it is fit for them.
At 18 she can surely see it as it is? She's barely a teen now.
My mother had 2 children and was keeping a 3 bed house clean at 18 (not that is an aspirational thing, but seriously my mum is untidy but nothing that bad).

Crikey, I thought my DD17's room was messy, but after seeing this her's isn't so bad .

@MiaKolpar

There’s no quick fix
It about respect

To answer your OP - no.

I have two kids and one is at uni. Her room is pristine when she's away

She's messy though. So twice a day (when she's back from uni that is ) I go in and clean and tidy her room to my satisfaction. I will bin anything I come across that I think is mess. So if she wants to avoid this, it's in her interests to keep her room tidy.

I couldn't sit in my house knowing one of the rooms in it looked like that. I relax when my house is nice and tidy. I also err like cleaning etc so this could skew things I suppose

I would clean it all up and give her a fresh start. Sometimes mess gets overwhelming

I would clean it all up and give her a fresh start. Sometimes mess gets overwhelming

No no no

She has got to understand how revolting it is tidying up

And then have the satisfaction of not being clean. She has to have some investment and ownership of the process.

the satisfaction of it being clean

Pretty disgusting and unacceptable in my book, if that was my DD's room l would bag the lot and throw it out.

Change the WiFi password and give it up when she cleans up.

Repeat as necessary.

Bloody hell thats awful! I don't understand how you've allowed her to get it so bad? I make DD tidy her room everyday!

We also have no food or drink upstairs (except bottled water if taking to bed). Certainly now bowls, crisps etc

I agree with @1shotcappuccino

I'd clean and tidy it and gut it to as minimalistic as possible. I'd then perform daily bedroom inspections because I can't get over anyone accepting a room being like that in their home

Yes the responsibility is hers and needs to be learnt but for the time being she is behaving like a toddler so I'd be treating her like one and if some favourite items got binned because e can't be bothered to take care of them - well, lessons being learnt right there

🤢 that must be absolutely stinking! Hey long as she's happy with the inevitable mice and rats eventually turning up and crawling all over her while she sleeps. You are definitely not a moaning bitch to moan about that shit hole.

A used sanitary towel is literally grim. Whenever my room was a tip my mum would pick up everything from the floor and chuck it on my bed, if I put shit and rubbish back on the floor she’d simply bin it!

Omg the OP is not being unfair! It's gross!
As a teen I had to share a room with 2 Sisters that was grim when one didn't wash!
I think the OP needs to withold pocket money etc until she tidies it!
The Sanitary towel is grim!!

I would clean it all up and give her a fresh start. Sometimes mess gets overwhelming

🤦‍♀️

Nope. My daughter is getting to a messy stage, and I’m disgusted in her room which is not 1/10th the state of your daughters.

Tell her, you have till xxxx and if it’s not done, I am going up there with bin bags. The odd shoes on the floor, yep, bin, those clothes? Bin. All of it.

As for the sanitary towel, I’ve no words.

I’m so sorry that a room in your house looks like this.

I was a messy teen but this is a whole other level ... wow

My DC's rooms can both get pretty grim but I would intervene before it got that bad OP

Its normal IME

OP I think you should ask Mumsnet to remove the photos as they could be identifying, which would be terrible after your comment about the used sanitary item. Imagine the mileage other kids would have with that. Think it’s really unfair for the photos to be posted.

Pannalash
The daughter is 18 not a kid and agreed to the post rtft

It's disgusting.

I used to put up with a floordrobe and an unmade bed. But food, drink and that amount of mess - never, ever.

That's squalor.

@Kikipost I'm wondering where the respect with this one went, then... The other DC are quite neat and tidy...