WIBU to get pizza delivered to DD's school for her birthday lunch?

[PizzaMom]

I apparently am known as 'that' parent and have been given the side eye the few times I've gone in since!

It was DD's 16th last month on a school day. I ordered a few pizzas to be sent to school at lunchtime so she could share them with her mates in the common room. Teachers were not going to let her have them and when they relented (by the time they got cold) made her and a few friends eat them in a separate meeting room when she had planned to share them as there was enough for about 20 people!

I don't see it as being that different from me bringing in a forgotten lunch box?

I also ordered flowers and a balloon to be delivered and school refused to let her have them until after school had finished.

I was trying to make DD's day special. I really didn't think would have been that much of an issue which ruined it a bit for DD.

WIBU?

There is absolutely no way either my daughter’s or son’s school in the US would allow this, it’s ridiculous.

God, some mothers.....

I also ordered flowers and a balloon to be delivered and school refused to let her have them until after school had finished.
I bet that went down like a lead balloon 😂

🥁 ba dum da!😂

To what do you ascribe the obesity epidemic in the UK then, Dontsweatthelittlestuff?
Is it really pizza once a year on a birthday?

And what are your thoughts on the menu described by the OP in the school cafeteria - apparently burgers, chips, etc.

www.openaccessgovernment.org/tackling-uks-obesity-epidemic/40192/
One in five UK children is obese or overweight by the time they get to primary school.

Both of the schools my children attend/ed in the US would allow this. One RC elementary, one public HS. Maybe the idea for the practice came from all those US universities advertising delivery of birthday care packages for students away from home for their birthdays, that parents can order and pay for.
A trickle down effect we can all believe in...

mathanxiety

maybe they allow it because they were asked?
Which is something that didn't happen to the school in the thread.

I can guarantee they are not asked, and never have been.

None of the alleged issues posted here wrt delivery of a birthday treat have been considered problems or even potential problems in either place.

mathanxiety

I can guarantee they are not asked, and never have been.

As I only know you through your posts on here your guarantee really isn't worth much unless you have something to back it up with.
Sorry

The point is presumably that in the US schools math is talking about the parents don't need to ask because it's normal practice. The difference is that OP must know it's not normal practice in her child's school so it's pretty elementary that she should have asked first.

While I think it probably was a ball ache I don't think I'd if reacted the way the teachers did.

Maybe the idea for the practice came from all those US universities advertising delivery of birthday care packages for students away from home for their birthdays, that parents can order and pay for.
A trickle down effect we can all believe in...

The cheese has well and truly slipped off your biscuit, hasn’t it?

Of course parents can send things to their children at university. University students are legally adults; they have their own address where they can receive deliveries. You can order enough pizza to feed Rome if you like when you’re an independent adult who isn’t expecting the institution’s staff to organise it for them.

Presumably these care packages are sent to the halls of residence or student house rather than into the university itself, with staff expected to find said students and let them know the package has arrived? Or do they pause lectures mid-way in the US because Tiffany or Britney has been sent a hamper filled with Tootsie Rolls and double-stuffed Oreos?

Ah Math getting entirely different concepts confused again.

What is a tote bag? Genuine question.

Presumably these care packages are sent to the halls of residence or student house rather than into the university itself, with staff expected to find said students and let them know the package has arrived? Or do they pause lectures mid-way in the US because Tiffany or Britney has been sent a hamper filled with Tootsie Rolls and double-stuffed Oreos?
CoughLaughFart

You don't know much about the US, do you...
Tiffany or Britney?
Tootsie Rolls?

All I can do is assure you that my observations are genuine, BorisBogtrotter. You can accept that gracefully or you can choose to be petty. The choice is yours.

You could equally disparage the observations of others on this thread, but I think if you are going to engage in such pettiness you should make it clear that the basis for your pooh-poohing is that you simply do not agree with the views posted, because otherwise you are simply basing your disbelief on unfamiliarity with an environment where people don't have poles up their asses that interfere with the operation of common sense.

The OP has similarly spent time elsewhere, and naturally assumed (alas wrongly) that since people elsewhere are well able to handle the massive emergency that is the delivery of pizza for 20 plus flowers plus balloons to a school the British would also be up to the task.

You need to read my post again on the 'trickle down effect' before accusing me of confusing different concepts. Also, try to imagine a school environment where staff do not run around like headless hens making eejits of themselves trying to fight back some imaginary tide of anarchy, and where students are expected to manage the distribution of birthday treats themselves.

Most U.K. schools would not allow this. Most U.K. students wouldn't want this. However, schools do all have their quirks. There used to be a lovely independent grocer near school and it was a 'thing' to buy random veg for people on their birthday.
The things that stands out about this is the sense of entitlement involved. And the desire on the part of the daughter to visibly exclude others. Mathanxiety is refusing to understand that. It has sod all to do with the pizza and the food and everything to do with the visible and unnecessary rejection of people not deemed good enough/popular enough to share in something that has become apparently school approved. Nope and again nope. You want a pizza party? Have a pizza party at home. And anyway a house party is more than enough for a 16th. A sweet 16 is nonsense. Want to mark it in a special way because it's a deal and she's becoming an adult - buy her a lottery ticket and a pack of condoms!

Again shaking my head sadly at the idea that 16 year olds are so immature that 'exclusion' from someone else's celebration in school would cause them distress - especially in this day and age when word of a party at home can spread to thousands of gatecrashers in minutes.

Do you honestly believe that the party at home wouldn't be common knowledge within 90 seconds of invitations being issued? And during the party and afterwards, the endless photos posted online..
No 'visible rejection' involved there, oh nooooo.

It is not the job of schools to massage the feelings of people who are well on their way to adulthood.

Again you miss the point. One is in school. One at home. You can do what you like in your home. You sure as hell don't get away with obnoxiously excluding people in my classroom. Some of our students do bring in food by the way. They bring in cake or chocolate for their class. Hell, they sometimes offer me some.
They're not snowflakes. They're not jealous.
No point discussing this with you as you don't get the difference between home and school.
It's bloody arrogant having the school run around after you or your child. And pizza stinks. Which is why we don't allow students to eat in classrooms. Just outside, or the canteen.

So a house party would be gatecrashed by thousands - and yet a school party wouldn’t?

Wouldn’t he teachers need to see invites into the common room? Guard the doors?

What’s the difference? One is inconveniencing parents in is inconveniencing teachers.

Do you honestly believe that the party at home wouldn't be common knowledge within 90 seconds of invitations being issued? And during the party and afterwards, the endless photos posted online..
No 'visible rejection' involved there, oh nooooo.
Except people are brought up to accept parties happen out of school for their friends. And the vast majority of birthday celebrations aren't gatecrashed and go just fine (which is why there aren't billions of threads about entirely normal birthday celebrations).

The difference between the normal social convention of a birthday invite vs something deliberately done in school time to prove how much better/cooler a group are is entirely obvious.

It is not the job of schools to massage the feelings of people who are well on their way to adulthood.
It's not the job of school to facilitate birthday celebrations by a parent/child who clearly want to make a fuss abiut they are so much more special and unique than anyone else.

What it comes down to is whether people believe expecting school to facilitate an attention seeking act is reasonable. Most people have said no.
The fact that the vast majority of parents and children celebrate birthdays without all this aggro is a fairly good indication of what is accepted reasonable behaviour.

Please tell me this is a joke?

Imagine if everyone's parents did that, taking the absolute piss!

You don't know much about the US, do you...

I’m not trying to write a dissertation on it.

I love this fucking thread.

Yes, I'm really enjoying it too.😂