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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WIBU to get pizza delivered to DD's school for her birthday lunch?

708 replies

PizzaMom · 12/01/2019 19:51

I apparently am known as 'that' parent and have been given the side eye the few times I've gone in since!

It was DD's 16th last month on a school day. I ordered a few pizzas to be sent to school at lunchtime so she could share them with her mates in the common room. Teachers were not going to let her have themHmm and when they relented (by the time they got cold) made her and a few friends eat them in a separate meeting room when she had planned to share them as there was enough for about 20 people!

I don't see it as being that different from me bringing in a forgotten lunch box?

I also ordered flowers and a balloon to be delivered and school refused to let her have them until after school had finished.

I was trying to make DD's day special. I really didn't think would have been that much of an issue which ruined it a bit for DD.

WIBU?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
MaisyPops · 14/01/2019 18:40

chestylarue52
Bonus marks if the school sign is in the background.
Bonus marks if there's a group shot of sad faces teens.
Bonus marks if by the end of the article the school gives a statement to the effect of ' we have eating arrangements for lunch but staff facilitating take away delivery isn't one off them'

chestylarue52 · 14/01/2019 18:45

Bonus marks if teenager has a really obnoxious name like Ammaretto

Wellfuckmeinbothears · 14/01/2019 19:12

Can’t believe my post got deleted! It basically said the same as everyone else! Op is an ignorant, daft mare. Mumsnet protecting the snowflakes I see!

Wellfuckmeinbothears · 14/01/2019 19:15

Chesty don’t be daft, the DD was called Constance Evie and obvs went to v famous private academy that can’t be named for advertising reasons.

LordPickle · 14/01/2019 19:22

Absolutely bonkers. Truly fucking batshit.

MaisyPops · 14/01/2019 19:25

Wellfuckmeinbothears
Join the club. I think a few people suspending judgement on the 'did it happen' spectrum have been deleted (me included)

Original poster
PizzaMom · 14/01/2019 20:12

I find it truly sad that some many people find me wanting to make my DD feel special on her birthday so unbelievable Hmm.

Your poor DC.

OP posts:
FuckingYuleLog · 14/01/2019 20:15

Nah it’s you making a complete tit of her and yourself that people find unbelievable. Most parents manage to make their kids birthdays special without resulting in getting ‘side eye’ at the school.

GreenTulips · 14/01/2019 20:16

But there are ways to make her feel special without all the fuss via school

DD recently 16 had a night at the theatre - next day was friends over for pizza and movies sleepover -yes I brought balloons
Monday she went to BF for tea and gifts
Tuesday was a pre booked Halloween type activity
Wednesday BF took her for a romantic meal
Friday was joint party with loads of friends

Lots of fuss - no need to involve school

BoneyBackJefferson · 14/01/2019 20:18

Will pizzamom manage to push the thread to 1000 with just occasional posts?

Lets find out.

Nunya · 14/01/2019 20:19

No one finds you wanting to make your daughter feel special on her birthday unbelievable though, OP. It’s your attitude that is the issue. Why not make your daughter feel special on her birthday by having a party for her sweet 16 outside of school then? What was so special about doing it at school? The built-in audience?

Nunya · 14/01/2019 20:21

The built in audience that couldn’t get away?

BoneyBackJefferson · 14/01/2019 20:22

Nunya

Loving the name :)

Nunya · 14/01/2019 20:24

👍🏻 Thank you, BoneyBackJefferson!

Nunya · 14/01/2019 20:25

With Weird emojis that I didn’t add ???

PhilomenaButterfly · 14/01/2019 20:32

Our poor DC. Who get taken ice skating with their best friends and for lunch in the extortionate diner afterwards on the weekend following their birthday, for example? Like most people?

mathanxiety · 14/01/2019 20:41

BorisBogtrotter, the OP didn't ask the school staff to do anything. They took it all upon themselves for reasons that I suspect are deeply silly, if the suggestions here are anything to go by.

Do you honestly think that the rest of the 15-turning-16 year olds in the year are all going to be pestering their parents for a similar delivery to school? What sort of teens do you have experience of? If you've seen this happen, I am truly astonished. Are British teens so immature that outright imitation would be considered, and parents so competitive?

Sorry you can't see the direct connection between an environment where envy goes unchecked, students are not expected to manage their own feelings about other people's possessions or celebrations, and bullying.

You really should read the link I posted. The failure in school of white FSM boys is a problem that is going to bite Britain in the arse ever more as time goes on

Original poster
PizzaMom · 14/01/2019 20:52

Well I have a life Boney and anyway I kind of lost interest when most of you said IWBUAngry.

Many thanks to Maths though. I agree with all she posted. We used to live not far from the US and ordered in pizza and choc milkshake Fridays were a thing when DD was in elementary school which she fondly remembers

OP posts:
mum11970 · 14/01/2019 21:03

Dd and quite a few of her friends have had their 18ths recently and have managed to survive the school day by just bringing in cake themselves but that is part of the privilege of being 6th form students who have a lot more freedom than lower years.
Whilst my dc’s school reception are perfectly happy to take in any forgotten items, the children may need, I can pretty much guarantee they would be unwilling to accept takeaway and flowers.
OP you deserve every ‘side eye’ you get.

mumtomaxwell · 14/01/2019 21:16

Ha ha ha! If you did that at the school I teach at you’d be seen as a lot more than ‘that’ parent!! We’d never take you seriously ever again!

Despite that:
You invited a random person into a school - that’s a massive safeguarding red flag.

You also expected overstretched school staff to deliver balloons to a classroom - you think it’s okay to disrupt other people’s learning like that? Just wow.

You are so very unreasonable!!

gambaspilpil · 14/01/2019 21:17

my word when it was my eldest DS 18th I got him a membership card for Ministry Of Sound and booked a private area and cabs to take him and his mates. No cake at school for him..... as for my DD who will be 16 this year she wants to go to a european city with friends definitely no pizza at school she would be mortified if I did that....but OP DD obviously appreciated it which is what matters

BoneyBackJefferson · 14/01/2019 21:37

PizzaMom
Well I have a life Boney and anyway I kind of lost interest when most of you said IWBUangry.

And yet here you are.

TBH, I am interested to see if this does get to 100 posts.

MaisyPops · 14/01/2019 22:53

mum11970
I agree.
I tend to get cake in if any of my y13s have an 18th fall on my lesson and they tell me. It's nice. It doesn't put anyone else out and it's a perk of 6th form (like me getting them coffees from the staff room if they've book in for a tutorial).

find it truly sad that some many people find me wanting to make my DD feel special on her birthday so unbelievable
Again, if the only way your DC can feel special on her birthday is by making a huge scene and expecting school staff to cater to the big look at me fuss then something has gone wrong somewhere.

Your poor DC.
What? For celebrating their birthdays with nearest and dearest? Friends and family? Having a birthday treat with those that matter instead of having a captive audience who are supposed to be filled with envy?
It's always envy and jealousy on these situations. Person A does something to draw attention to themselves and prove how special and unique they are and hope the world is jealous of them. Anyone who admires them and supports them proves how great they are and anyone who challenges them is only challenging them because they are jealous, thus proving to themselves how awesome and special they are. (E.g. AIBU to spend £4,000 on a handbag. I happened to be carrying it to coffee and happened to mention to my friend that things are tight what with spending so much on my investment piece. She said it was a stupid waste of money. I'm sure it's just inverted snobbery and she's just jealous that I can afford to have treats).

Whizzpoppingtrogglehumper · 14/01/2019 23:14

I find this thread bizarre Shock

At my child's school it was the norm to have pizza deliveries etc and the teachers joined in! shock horror the teachers also sang happy birthday to the entitled brats - whilst grabbing a slice of pizza Shock

OP don't stop treating your daughter as special - you know your daughter and you know she would love this and make her feel special - frankly disgusted at those who have took the piss throughout this thread.

God forbid a loving mother tries to do something nice for her daughter...pfft

GreenTulips · 14/01/2019 23:31

and you know she would love this and make her feel special - frankly disgusted at those who have took the piss throughout this thread

What’s special about pizza? Nothing really we have it most weeks.

The only ‘special’ is the fuss caused at school - by everyone staring - not as OPs suggests in amazement and jealously but in total cringyness of the situation