AIBU to think that most women over 35..

[thinkingaboutmyage]

Are a size 10 or above?

My friend has suggested that my new year resolution should be to slim down and tone my body - st first I was offended, but I actually think she was genuinely trying to be helpful or perhaps, motivational?

She’s a size 6 having focused on exercise/diet last year and lost 2 stone! I’m a size 10 and eat whatever I like she thinks that once I’m 40 it’ll be hard to maintain my weight unless I join her as a fitness fanatic

AIBU to think that most of us over-35s are a size 10 or above though. She’s the exception not the norm - her lifestyle seems tedious as she lives at the gym.

Surely the relevant question is not what most women of 35+ weigh (most people in the UK are overweight these days, doesn’t make it healthy) but whether you yourself feel healthy and happy. If you do then ignore her!

I know a few post 35s. They are about a 6-8, and are that size because they don't eat much and go to the gym almost every day. If you want to be that thin great, but for me it's extremely tedious, hard, perpetually hungry work.

She thinks unless I make the effort now, my weight will gradually creep up after hitting 40?

Yeah.......that’s exactly what I’ve found, as has DSis, SIL & friends. Middle age spread isn’t inevitable but it has certainly gone on quickly and is a lot harder to shift in my 40’s than it was at say 37/38. I wish I had paid more attention and not let this stone creep on.

But size 10 is tiny anyway

I don’t know anyone other than my 17 year old sister who is a size 6-8.

I wouldn't have said a size 10 or above, if have said a size 14 or above, and I wouldn't exclude the over 35's.

Because most women in the UK are fat/obese.

And it's the same for men, and children. We've normalised being obese.

We went away to Holland last month for a long weekend, and were stunned how slim everyone is there compared to the UK. We saw more fat people in the arrivals lounge in Heathrow than we did in the 4 days prior.

I think she's right about weight gain as we age. Clothes sizes are arbitrary but given the average size of a woman is a 16 I'd say the majority of older women would be above a 10.

In my early 20s i was a size 8-10, very skinny but i had quite a big bone structure. My friend was heavier than me but a size 6, she was taller than me but extremely small boned, tiny hips, very narrow shoulders.

I'm 38 and i vary between a 12 to 14 (usually the latter) and although I'd like to lose a stone I'm happy with my figure overall. I'm active, do gym and martial arts but I'll never be a size 10 again. Had 3 kids in 4 years, my body is fucked!!

Just to dispel the myth that all 6-8s are gym bunnies: I’m size 8, a 6 in some shops. I’m 38. I don’t go to the gym. I walk school runs and do Pilates once a week in term time, that’s it. I’m just small build (5’3” and tiny frame). I have had to eat a LOT less since hitting 30 though.

Your friend is sort of right.
I am now just a stone over weight and am 52. I haven't really watched what I've eaten but don't eat a lot of crap.
Recently I lost a stone, this was through lack of appetite with meds, otherwise I'd never have lost it.
Your metabolism slows down as you get older and if you carry on eating the same you will put on weight. Your size 10/12 can soon become 12/14 or even 14/16 if you aren't careful.
So, she's kind of right, but nothing wrong with being 10/12 or even bigger if you are healthy and not over weight.

42 this year and usually a size 8 sometimes slips to a 6 if I am going through a bad time.

What's with all these clothes size threads recently? And you're talking bollocks OP. I'm 56, 5'5 and size 6 (in 'normal' shops like Zara and Mango) and my waist is 24' - oh and I'm not thin, or waif like or anything like that - just slim. Oh and I don't have an eating disorder, or starve myself. I don't even do portion control. I just eat reasonably healthily and don't drink. That's it.

There seems to be a very strange idea about weight on MN that I don't come across in real life.

Well, I’m a size 14-16 and have been since I was probably about 21. I’m 38 now. I’ve also run 2 half marathons at this size and never had any problems attracting suitors, including my dh. Be whatever size is comfortable for you.

I'm 46, just under 5 foot 4 and a size 8. I exercise a lot but I eat a lot too.

However, I have a dress from when I was 18 that just about fits and it is a size 12! Sizes mean nothing these days.

My BMI is around 21 but my waist is too big for my hips (about 29 inches waist compared with 34 inch hips). I can't wear a blouse tucked in.

A 10 isn't tiny. I'm short, mid 40s and look really chunky at a size 10. I've never been as much as a 12 but I think I'd look fat. I'm a standard 8, just over 8 stone and although I have work harder to keep there at my age it's not that hard. The trouble is that in thinking weight gain is inevitable with age, people do nothing about it and these boards are full of overweight women trying to convince themselves that a size 10 is tiny when they are 5 ft 3 and they are 'only' a couple of stones overweight.
MN is obsessed with dress size. It depends how tall you are. I look fat over a 10, someone of 6 ft looks thin in a 10. Nobody is thin in a 16 unless they are 8 ft. It doesn't matter what the average dress size is. The stats show that two thirds of adult women are overweight or obese so unfortunately the average is overweight.

I am 41, size 14, short and dumpy and have been this way since my teens.

I’ve never been a size 6, even as a teenager without an ounce of fat on me I was between an 8 and 10 (25 yrs ago, maybe that’s a 6 now?).

Not being funny but if you're a size ten and eat what you like I'd be too busy thanking my lucky stars instead of listening to your mate

I'm over 35 and a size 8. I'm also 5'0 and quite podgy round my middle (think BMI is around 23 which is the heavier side of 'normal'). Dress sizes are meaningless

I'm mid 50s, petite, 159cm and 47kg. Normal bmi. Have always been slender, apart from pregnancy. I go to gym once a week, also yoga and I love walking. I eat three meals a day and don't really snack. I do seem to be in the minority in my age group in my area. Getting decent clothes to fit is not easy - I need clothes for an adult woman, not a teenager! !

@museumum Yes, that would be a 6 now. It's all changed - a lot.

I was size 10 bottom at 23, but still size 12 top. That was my absolute, genuine thinnest. Now at 38 and after 3 children, I am size 14. Realistically I can only hope to be toned, shapely Size 14. I don’t think my 34GG boobs will fit into anything smaller. When I was 23 and Size 12 I had a C cup (probably wrong size but much smaller than now in any case). And my hips were smaller as I haven’t carried and birthed 3 children at that point, so no way can I fit back into a size 10 jeans now.

Does Size matter so much? We are all built differently. I am not built tiny or dainty, never been even as a child. I am strong and muscly. Should I strive for something unachievable or just be my personal best at Size 14, a grown woman with a bust and hips?

What matters is not your clothes size, but your body composition or the proportion of fat in your body. I have see plenty of thin people with round shoulders and poor posture who look every bit of their age. I think we are barking up the wrong tree going on about weight and size.

Clumsy fingers. .I am 150cm, not 159cm, that would not be normal bmi at my weight!!!

I'm 38 and I'm a size 12 at only 57kgs because I have a fair amount of muscle. The high street doesn't design clothes for people with quads and glutes!

The only reason metabolism slows with age is because we lose muscle mass, so your best bet is to focus on building muscle rather than losing weight. She won't fare any better if she's just a cardio bunny or doesn't eat enough to actually put on muscle.

I wasn’t a size 10 even as a teenager. Now I’m late 40s. If I had a friend like yours, I’d tell her to bugger off and mind her own business. Being active healthy is important but living your life in the gym strikes me as a tad obsessive, especially if it’s done just to maintain a teeny dress size.

i'm 5ft 5 btw and bmi is 20.9