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AIBU?

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Original poster

Saw something really horrible

123 replies

QuestionableMouse · 06/01/2019 23:38

I accidentally clicked on a link to something really awful. I don't want to go into too much detail but it was animal abuse and pretty graphic. (Chinese dog meat trade)

I can't stop thinking about it and it's really upsetting me. I'm not sure how to get it out of my head and didn't sleep much last night because it kept popping into my head.

Any ideas how I can get past it please?

OP posts:
NewYorkDoll3 · 06/01/2019 23:39

Watch some funny tv. An episode of Friends - The one with Ross's tan (or teeth!) An episode of the inbetweeners, or the I.T crowd.

Take your mind off it. Smile

JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff · 06/01/2019 23:40

It's horrible when that happens.

I'd make some warm milk and find a silly Classics thread.

Original poster
QuestionableMouse · 06/01/2019 23:41

Thanks. Been watching Nashville tonight but it keeps randomly popping into my head.

OP posts:
Elephantina · 06/01/2019 23:45

Aaargh even as I clicked on this I was please don't let it be animal abuse...

I'm the same OP, hugely distressed by anything like that. Take your mind off it by reading or watching something silly, the horror will fade over time although you can never forget it.

And make sure you hide such things on your feed, if that's where you stumbled across it. Gah, this has reminded me of one I saw by accident. Pass the brain bleach.

MrsCatE · 06/01/2019 23:50

Sorry but why don't you investigate how you can help to stop this disgusting practice - even something easy like signing up to a petition? I'm not sure what's allowed here re links but Lisa Vanderpump of 'Real Housewives' fame is a campaigner against who's actually proactive and managed to rescue dogs from this disgusting 'cultural' norm.

She has made a documentary about Yulin if you really do not want to sleep again. There is no excuse for this torture of animals.

PennyMordauntsLadyBrain · 06/01/2019 23:54

Sorry but why don't you investigate how you can help to stop this disgusting practice

It’s nearly midnight- Op probably just wants to be able to chill out before bed without those images spinning round her head.

Investigations into stopping widespread animal abuse on a different continent can hold off until tomorrow.

JustABetterPlayer · 06/01/2019 23:57

This reply has been deleted

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Franheaton · 06/01/2019 23:59

Really sorry you're upset OP. It's horrible when that happens. Agree with watching something funny to take you out of yourself. Weirdly, I find Frankie Boyle useful for this just because he shocks me out of whatever I'm thinking. And makes me laugh.

Original poster
QuestionableMouse · 07/01/2019 00:03

Thanks.

Not sure anything will do anything to help. I've signed stuff in the past and it just gets ignored.

OP posts:
Pennina · 07/01/2019 00:05

Poor you. I'm the same with that sort of stuff. If I can't switch off at night I listen to
a good audiobook. Stops me overthinking.

Maryjoyce · 07/01/2019 01:56

Hard to stop such things when it’s normal in other parts the world

Smotheroffive · 07/01/2019 02:01

The only way I can manage it is to know the suffering is over for the animal you saw

There are people all over the world, since time begin that treat animals, women, children and men despicably.

We all must play our part however we can to call it and stop it.

ClaireElizabethBeauchampFraser · 07/01/2019 02:12

I had a similar situation last year, it turned me vegan. I had flashbacks fr weeks and would randomly burst into tears. The horror of humanity’s creation can just be too much! I am tearing up just thinking about it.

I found and signed petitions and made changes to my lifestyle. On the evening itself I watched funny videos on you tube and tried to fill my head with more positive images. I had a sleepless night trying to forget it and crying when it came up again.

My dh was rather baffled, it wasn’t a pet in my case, it was newborn calves being shot (simply for being male)that I watched. DH is a country lad and wasn’t overly phased- it made him uncomfortable but not enough to make him want to stop having dairy and meat!

Perhaps you could research ways to help change the dog meat trade. I would be traumatised in your shoes as my dogs are family, our youngest is currently curled up under his blanket between dh and I. It breaks my heart that it happens, dogs are such innocent, trusting and loving animals, it’s heartbreaking.

NotTheFordType · 07/01/2019 02:54

I really feel for you OP, I find stories of animal and/or child cruelty really affect me in a bad way.

Things that have helped me:
Writing my feelings down and posting them where nobody can comment
Donating to the charity who has helped, or if not possible, volunteering things or time instead (time instead works better for me and I think for the charity, but keep your options open for occasional days - at the end of 2017 I helped a local charity make its fundraising and publicity goal.)
Is there a local cause your children can help with? My DS (young adult) has a cordless drill/screwdriver and we frequently volunteer to help put flat pack furniture together.

All of these positive things can really help combat flashbacks from PTSD.

Flowers OP and I hope today is easier than yesterday.

FrankieChips · 07/01/2019 03:06

Google HSI or look them up on FB. They work hard to close down dog meat farms and have rescued thousands of dogs over the years. They have lovely success stories on their page and they warn you if any of the content is graphic (it is never usually too bad though. They don’t show animals being killed or tortured).

It helps me to know people are doing something about this. Opinions are changing and younger people are against this “tradition”. I believe it will end soon.

They rescue stories are heart warming. Pete Wickes from TOWIE works with the, and helped shut down a farm.

Rockmysocks · 07/01/2019 05:08

I'm with you on all animal abuse. Watched a documentary about smoking beagles many years ago that still haunts me. I can't watch the TV campaigns showing bears, donkeys, snow leopards, cats , dogs, etc, because the images stay with me and honestly make me despair.

My partner says we can never stop the animal cruelty from intensive farming through to deliberate sadistic cruelty but we can make sure our pets are loved and well cared for and by donating to the animal charities though I wonder how much gets wasted on overpaid executives. But have to do something.

sackrifice · 07/01/2019 05:24

What is the difference between dogs, and other animals that are slaughtered for meat though?

jemihap · 07/01/2019 06:21

sackrifice - In the case of the Chinese dog meat trade the animals have non-existent welfare conditions whilst they're being reared, in fact they often deliberately make the dogs suffer... and then they literally torture them to death (I could give more graphic descriptions of just what they do but I won't)

They do it because they believe that if the animal suffers a stressful and painful death it releases hormones which improves the quality and flavour of the meat.

At least in more humane countries the animals are reared in reasonable conditions and the slaughter process is efficient, clinical and pain free (by comparison)

Skittlesandbeer · 07/01/2019 06:57

I’ve been studying how the brain works, the plasticity, etc.

I’m much more careful now about giving valuable brain space to upsetting things. Every time you let the film replay in your head, it makes a deeper groove and it becomes harder to dislodge it.

There’s a really fine line between the ‘talking through and processing’ model, and the ‘don’t let it take hold’ model. Be careful, even with starting discussions on it. You may be better off throwing yourself into work, a project, something very all-encompassing and distracting. Don’t let it suck you in. Don’t give it drama. When it pops up, have a strategy. Don’t focus on it. Do 10 star jumps, if that’s what it takes to budge it. Sounds crazy, but it can work.

sackrifice · 07/01/2019 07:16

sackrifice - In the case of the Chinese dog meat trade the animals have non-existent welfare conditions whilst they're being reared, in fact they often deliberately make the dogs suffer... and then they literally torture them to death (I could give more graphic descriptions of just what they do but I won't

Not being funny, but if you eat meat, you are part of the problem. If you eat meat, then you have to accept that animals will be badly treated to get that meat on your plate.

Pretending your meat was lovingly coaxed into sacrificing itself for you, is utter bollocks. All animals suffer when being reared for you, who are you to justify which ones should suffer more or less?

sackrifice · 07/01/2019 07:18

Don’t focus on it. Do 10 star jumps, if that’s what it takes to budge it. Sounds crazy, but it can work

Yeah, star jumps. I'm sure the turkeys slaughtered over the festive season really appreciate that. Nice one.

Ispini · 07/01/2019 07:20

OP so sorry you are upset. I saw a documentary once with animal abuse accidentally and literally didn't sleep for a week. The images in your head will fade in time but I know how you feel. Just think that for every f*er that does this there are 3 people helping and caring. Hope you have a good day.

FamilyOfAliens · 07/01/2019 07:21

I agree with stopping eating meat. It helped me when I made the change 30 years ago. Of course, people will tell you that one person becoming vegetarian won’t make a difference but just I ignore them - it helps me.

(Obviously we now have people who’ve been vegan for five minutes telling us we’re hypocrites, but ignore them too!).

TeddybearBaby · 07/01/2019 07:22

I saw a dog fight on Facebook once - that was a few years ago. I was so upset. I felt sick, I couldn’t focus, I was teary. That all probably went on for a few days. Just took time to move on. I’d still get upset at the thought for months and it’d pop into my head every now and then. I don’t click on any videos any more at all and it’s really helped. I still think about the dogs every now and then. I know the feeling though and it’s awful x

Fluffycloudland77 · 07/01/2019 07:28

Set up a direct debit to animals in asia' they are trying to stop the cat and dog meat trade.