To think buying a £52 eyeshadow pallet for 9 year old is just madness?

[pineapplepenthouse]

I'm talking about the James Charles pallet. £52 for eyeshadow and blusher. My DD9 wants to spend her Christmas money on it but I have said a firm NO! A lot of her friends got it for Christmas (I know this is true as have seen their mothers show it off on Facebook). Each to their own and all that but £52! AIBU?

It's not called parenting, it's called controlling

Well there is undoubtedly an element of control involved in parenting otherwise children would just all do what the fuck they wanted.

Sorry, still don't get you. This thread is about a make up palette. Are you saying children should never be allowed to spend their money on what they want without parents having the final say? And if they don't then they're absolving themselves of parenting in a way that is similar to allowing them to cross roads unsupervised?

I wouldn’t let my 9yo spend that kind of money on something like that. Having had a couple of teens already I think the sooner you discourage them from following into expensive trends the better (unless money isn’t an issue).

None of mine have been interested in make up etc so young anyway, I got my 12yo some eye make up to play and experiment with for Xmas but it was only basic cheaper end stuff. She can have nicer stuff when she knows what she’s doing.

As for letting them spend that kind of money on what they want - I usually go through options with them, reminding them what they’ve been wanting and asking for for a while. Encouraging them to save rather than spend for the sake of it is also an option.

I usually let mine buy things I probably wouldn’t choose or think of for them - but within reason.

OP your instincts are telling you it’s wrong. I’m amazed that there are so many people who blithely say the child can choose because it’s her money. My DC got £200 for Christmas and wants to blow the lot on vbucks but of course I’m not going to let him, yet according to the mentality of some people on here, it seems they would. I say that would be totally irresponsible.
As for the product itself - I wouldn’t be encouraging my child to be using make up. Not at 9. I don’t feel it is age appropriate at all. In another 4-5 years perhaps, but not now.

I'm glad my DS (13) agrees with me. He has more sense than some pps here.

I wouldn’t have allowed it at 9. Or rather I wouldn’t have allowed her to wear make up outside of a theatre (she was doing Panto and dance shows at that age and had proper make up for that.

Better your child blows £200 on vbucks now (if they regret it) than blows their rent money on something frivolous because they weren’t allowed to learn their own lessons as a child. Though I personally think giving a child £200 to spend full stop is far too much hence you having to manage the spending.
While you might want your child to spend their £200 on the works of Shakespeare, clothes or whatever you think would be a worthy way of spending it it’s not your £200 and making your child get things they like less isn’t better value for money.
Some adults on here pay near £100 for a single candle which I find ridiculous. But no doubt they get more joy from their candles than whatever I would suggest they spend their £100 on.

I think it’s fine if you can afford it

IMO, a child who is allowed to spend all their Christmas money on vwhatever is more likely to spend all their rent money on crap when they're adults.
This is when we teach them to save and responsible spending.
A 9 year old is never going to regret spending all their money on games. But at 29, or even 19, they may regret that their parents have allowed them to.

And yes, even if I give, say, £20 for my child to spend on books, or take him to a library to bring books home, I'll be vetting his choice even if he doesn't notice it. I wouldn't allow books I didn't think were appropriate for his age, white supremacy stuff, or anything like that.

I wear makeup and I'm not 'obsessed with my looks'. Neither is my daughter. She just likes to play about with makeup. I think it's pretty normal.
She got the Revolution palette today and is over the moon with it! Don't think I've done any long lasting damage by not letting her buy what she wants. In fact she's happy she has money left over!

Is she saving anything or spending it all on crap?

@peachypetite she's saving the rest for now!

To your original question, my dd bought that palette for herself with her Christmas money, (thought she is 13) it's actually a really nice palette, and having seen her go through lots of "cheap" ones I can see the appeal in all fairness. Though it cost 39 from morphe, not 52?? only uses it to try out looks indoors and doesn't wear it to school or anything like that, but at 9 I think was when she started wanting to play about with make up, just from watching tutorials on youtube. I'd rather make up fun than something virtual like game dlc any day.

Just asking because my parents saved some Christmas and birthday money etc because we had usually had loads of presents too and I thank them so much for it. All those £50 and £100 that I would have spent on crap added up and I had enough for a house deposit when the time came.

Just seen your last post glad she got something shes happy with

I know nothing about makeup, but when I was in the queue in the Superdrug the other day some of the Mua palettes they were promoting looked amazing and brilliant value.

Opps just read back .. good choice about going to SD

Hope she has fun with it. Which one out of interest? Looking for my friends Dd. (With permission)

Glad you found a solution. I asked DD 9 about this today. She wanted all the details, how much did she have, how often did she wear make-up, what has she bought in the past (also, what is her name, does she have a pet, does she collect anything - DD is always about the details). In the end she concluded that not, that’s too much money to spend in one hit unless it’s for something you really, really want because maybe in the next shop there would be something else you want but you’ve spent all your money. When I asked what she thought you should do she said, show her lots of alternatives which are cheaper and better then she’d have money to spend on other things. So, it seems you’ve done the right thing according to 9 year olds 😄. She was also happy that “something else” may well be squishies. She wants that watermelon one. 🙄

Of course makeup is sexualising

Extending that argument, I’m not sexy because I don’t wear makeup?

She bought two! Ultra eyeshadows and blush palette! A fraction of the cost and she's just as happy!

Think I might borrow the eyeshadow one for my next night out whenever that may be 🤣

Fab, thank you

Great stuff OP, the cosmetics industry is such a rip off, I hate to see my teens falling for their falsehoods.

@leaveby10