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Original poster

Is going to grandparents at Christmas a new thing?

143 replies

Pinknike · 25/12/2018 20:56

When I was a child we didn't leave he house on Christmas Day, it was always present, breakfast, watch tv then Christmas dinner.

These days all I hear is people with young families venturing out to their parents, in laws or other extended family. A lot of the time I hear them saying that they don't really want to go for whatever reason, or how they have to alternate.

I wonder if this is a new thing, or if as a child we lived in our own bubble.

I end up feeling really guilty for declining in laws invitation, but as nice as they are, I like nothing more on Christmas Day than relaxing in my own house.

OP posts:
00100001 · 25/12/2018 20:58

Fairly standard to visit relatives or have them visit on the day

CmdrIvanova · 25/12/2018 20:58

We went to both sets of grandparents on Christmas Eve in the evening, and again after church on Christmas morning, as far back as I can remember. But then both sets of GPs were 10 minutes drive away, tops.

Littlecaf · 25/12/2018 20:59

Eh? Are you ok glue? It’s nice to see relatives at Christmas.

steff13 · 25/12/2018 20:59

No, we've always done it.

pinkiepie1 · 25/12/2018 21:00

I'm 30 and up until I was 13 we went to my grandma's for dinner.
From me being 13 to 20 she came to ours on Xmas day.

Now me dh and 2 dd go my parents with sis, bil and dn on Xmas eve and have our Christmas then.
Then Christmas morning my parents come round with presents but we stay in pjs. We have done this for past 4 years. It works for us.

SarahET · 25/12/2018 21:00

We went to one set of grandparents on Christmas Day and the others a couple of days after (they lived further and a stay over was required)

Excited101 · 25/12/2018 21:00

We used to often go and stay with our Grandma for Christmas, or she or my other grandparents would come here. It’s hardly a new thing...

RangerLady · 25/12/2018 21:01

Dh and I were talking about this today. Neither of our families went anywhere else on Christmas day. We went to my mum's today has we're about to move house and didn't want to host, but as of next year we're the hosts and people can come to us! I feel like this is normal for my friends too.

greendale17 · 25/12/2018 21:01

No it is not a new thing at all

ButteryParsnips · 25/12/2018 21:01

I think the point about distance is key. I went to grandparents at Christmas but they lived in the same town, only 10 minutes' drive away (and in an era where it wasn't unacceptable to have a drink then make that drive home). Now it seems a lot of people are expected to travel to GPs who are much further away.

TinselandToblerones · 25/12/2018 21:01

We’d always have Christmas with grandparents and aunties and uncles. It’s lovely to spend Christmas with extended family

Ellieboolou27 · 25/12/2018 21:02

I’m early 40’s and always went to grandparents for Christmas dinner, i had mum and dad over today. We are a close family and couldn’t imagine spending Christmas Day without my parents.

Sparklingbrook · 25/12/2018 21:03

We would have Christmas Dinner at home then off to maternal Grandparents in the evening about an hour away for tea every single year. Where we would meet up with our Aunts, Uncles and Cousins.

Now my parents come here but we live very close.

MissWilmottsGhost · 25/12/2018 21:03

I went to granny's for Christmas dinner for about 30 years of my life Confused

DD's grandparents come to ours.

AhhhHereItGoes · 25/12/2018 21:03

I never went to mine but they did live in a different country.

We go to my parents because my parents spoil the kids, we are close bond wise and my sister alternates between 23-26th and 26th-29th with our parents and her ILs.

ILoveMaxiBondi · 25/12/2018 21:03

We always did. It was presents, breakfast, bath, mass, go to mum’s parents and then Dad’s dad and the aunts and uncles that lived near him and then home for Christmas dinner and watch whatever video/DVDs we had gotten for Xmas.

PinkHeart5914 · 25/12/2018 21:03

Always saw grandparents at Christmas when I was small

My dc have always seen grandparents and other relatives Christmas Day

Most people like seeing loved ones at this time of year........

TheMincePiesAreMine · 25/12/2018 21:04

When I was little, grandparents generally came to us. Convincing my mum that times have moved on and they should come to us now, at least sometimes, has been a challenge!

Bellabutterfly2016 · 25/12/2018 21:04

I'm at my mums with dp, dd3 and my brother, SIL and their 2 aswell as we can get the kids to bed and all be together plus saves driving between 3 houses and my parents have the most space.

Done this for years even before kids it starts on Xmas Eve ends Boxing Day or even the day after and we do stuff all together.

We like it and finds it works but everyone is different I guess.

Bunnybigears · 25/12/2018 21:04

We always went to GPs for Christmas dinner when I was a child so 80s and 90s so my Mum didnt have to cook and could enjoy us opening our presents etc. Then after my GF died and GM got older she started to come to us.

nancy75 · 25/12/2018 21:05

I’m 43 & I’ve never spent a Christmas Day without my parents, when my Nan was alive she was there too. My family like each other & I would be upset to spend Christmas without them ( as would my Dd & even my DH!)

Parker231 · 25/12/2018 21:06

We always visited grandparents or they came to us. This year we have both sets of grandparents staying for the week and DSis, DSil and their DH’s and DC’s.

BuggerOffAndGoodDayToYou · 25/12/2018 21:06

I’m 50 soon (yikes) and we always alternated between visiting maternal or paternal grandparents when I was small. When we were older then one or other set would often come and stay.

Even when I left home it was expected that DH and I would join the family visit to my remaining set of grandparents. DH and I always visited his grandparents (the ones that acknowledged me the others DH wouldn’t see because they were rude to me) at some point over Christmas.

Our DCs don’t have the option to visit grandparents so it’s just us four here.

Alex3101 · 25/12/2018 21:06

I'm in my early 40s and we used to go to my Nana's or my Grandmas at Christmas. In fact my Nana used to have everyone over, that was my M & D and my sister, my uncles and their families as well. So that was 13 people.
We rotate Christmas now, my pil came to ours today, we went to them last year and it will be my parents next year.

Eilaianne · 25/12/2018 21:06

We had Christmas in the house by ourselves yes - but now both sets of GPs also expect us to travel to them for some reason, it has changed.

I don't know why, they got to enjoy Christmas with us as a nuclear family, GPs occasionally popped around for an hour in the morning. Or more often on boxing Day.

But the GPs were all locally based so perhaps that's the difference - most of my family is scattered now, house prices, job security, moving for uni, has all led to different ways of living where parents aren't close by.

Also no one I know at my age can even host a family Christmas - no dining room for most of DH family. Studio apartment for my sister. Work accommodation intended for a single person for another sibling. And DH and I have no space for more than 4 at our table (even then you need to basically take up all the floor space in the kitchen, you can't walk around with our table once it's unfolded).

So in short - different expectations probably stemming from travel logistics and practical problems?

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