Is going to grandparents at Christmas a new thing?

[Pinknike]

When I was a child we didn't leave he house on Christmas Day, it was always present, breakfast, watch tv then Christmas dinner.

These days all I hear is people with young families venturing out to their parents, in laws or other extended family. A lot of the time I hear them saying that they don't really want to go for whatever reason, or how they have to alternate.

I wonder if this is a new thing, or if as a child we lived in our own bubble.

I end up feeling really guilty for declining in laws invitation, but as nice as they are, I like nothing more on Christmas Day than relaxing in my own house.

I'm 41 and we visited my grandparents every Christmas day until they died.

I was born in the 70's and always saw paternal grandparents straight after church and then went to maternal grandparents for Christmas dinner with whole family and Godparents. Generally got home about midnight. When MG and and Godfather died months apart my parents hosted but did driving to collect and drop home. Still went to see paternal GM first and did so until she passed away when I was in my 30's.

Some of my fondest memories are of being at my grandparents at Xmas
We usually went up after (like on Boxing Day) and spent Xmas as a "little" family but there was a steady flow of family through my grandparents house throughout the festive period
Most years we saw a pantomime or show too
My kids see their grandparents and other relatives if I can manage it

I never visited family at Christmas growing up as my dad was in the army.

It's how we continued to do Christmas as an adult. We do now live close to my mum and step dad and they used to pop over for a bit on Christmas day.

I like it that way!

Ex-h previously and now DP go to my parents with my daughter now, although we plan to host next year.

Nope when my daughter was born I declared that Christmas day was just us as family at home. We do then visit the in laws on boxing Day. My parents live too far away to visit, plus it would feel mean visiting my in laws on Christmas day and her seeing my children's excited when my own mum can't.

Opposite for us. We always had family come to us when we were little. Now we have kids we always stay home and they come to us. It's madness dragging young kids out at Christmas, nothing against seeing family but when you have kids I believe you should take the role of hosting over from the grandparents.

We were like you - just the three of us, my sister, mum and me at home. When my maternal grandma got older she would come to us for Christmas dinner some years but stay an hour or two, and paternal grandparents we'd visit for lunch some time between Christmas and New Year usually. I've been all over the north of England today and although obviously I'm glad to see our families I miss Christmas day where I didn't get out of my new Christmas pyjamas and it was about staying cosy in the house!

After I was born, my mum decided they would stay at home on Christmas. Sometimes my gp’s came to us (my gd died when I was ten and some of my best memories of him are Christmas ones) and sometimes we went to them on Boxing Day. I still don’t like busy Christmases with loads of people (I am a bit of an introvert though!) I’ve enjoyed being hosted by friends, but used to dread going to the in-laws.

I don't mean as in not seeing people at all, but for us it might get have been people popping in on Christmas Eve, Christmas morning or Boxing Day. Not spending the whole day.

My dc like staying at home, it's nothing to do with not liking people, we just all like being home.

There's no right or wrong way I just wondered whether people went out more on Christmas Day because we always spent it at home, dh did too but then as his grandparents became elderly they'd come for dinner.

We almost always had Christmas Day at home, just the four of us, when I was growing up. I can only remember going to my grandmother's house once on Christmas Day, after my grandfather died.

We would visit family around Christmas, on Boxing Day etc. But Christmas Day was just for us. And it was great.

I feel lucky that my DPs encourage and support us to do that every 3rd year, more or less. It's nice to sit around in pyjamas and comfy clothes and not have to entertain/host for a change. We have the house for hosting, so pretty much always host.

40s always spent Christmas at home with mum and dad.

To be fair, one set of GPs was in a different country.

But other set would move to stay with Aunt and Uncle each year, GM would never ever expect to host. And we were never expected to do a grand whole family thing on Christmas Day - we would turn up on Boxing Day after having the day itself at home.

Does sound on MN like there are a lot of GPs who had Xmas at home as parents but have completely forgetten this as GPs.

Other way around for us, my childhood memories are of opening presents then having to go to grandparents for lunch then home when it was dark and to bed and I hated it.
I was bored after half an hour and wanted to be at home with my new presents in my pyjamas.

When I had kids I was determined not to make them go out on Christmas day and so we visit relatives on other days and have lovely, cosy, relaxed Christmases at home.

Today has been spent in our pj's playing with their presents, eating lovely food and watching Christmas films under the duvet on the sofa.

Again it definitely is nothing to do with not liking each other. I love visiting family and them us.

The boy with children at Christmas I have found mine like staying in their pyjamas playing with their new things, we also have a tipple on Christmas Day meaning neither want to drive.

we always have Christmas with my mum, dcs wouldn't not see Grandma on Christmas day. Eldest dc is 28 and has only known one Christmas where G'ma wasn't there - she was travelling abroad at the time.
I think it's pretty standard

I think it wasn't a 'thing' before because many generations of the same family lived in the same house. Transport was scarce and people didn't have the money to travel.

I'm 50 and never went to Grandparents for Christmas. When I was 5 I only had maternal grandparents left.

Christmas Day for us was present opening, Dad prepping veg, Dad sodding off to the pub until 1.30pm. Mother served up lunch she cooked, Dad washed dishes then went to bed, getting up for cold turkey and pickles then sodded off to the pub until closing time. Our Mother didn't drive then nor did we have a telephone until I was 16. We played with our new toys all afternoon, watched shit tv (3 channels) then went to bed.

Boxing Day our Dad drove us, 10 mile round trip to our Grandparents for an hour or two. Then we went home. Grandparents had both died by the time I was 14.

It's not a new thing at all.

My grandparents all lived abroad and I always felt as though I was missing out when we had Christmas just "us".

We always had my grandparents for xmas dinner or went to my Uncles with my grandparents , and than my other grandparents on boxing day i had a 70,s childhood

OP - we're the same.

Always enjoyed Christmas just us at home. Usually phone rellies to wish Merry Christmas.
There's nothing nicer than complete relaxation, up when you want, gifts when we want, dinner when we want in our PJs if we feel like it , telly/bath/kip when you want.

New Year is the time we socialise but then we have one half as Scots so it's bigger than Christmas.

OP what did you do once you’d left home but not started your own family? Did you not go to your parents for Christmas Day then?
My grandma always came to us when I was a kid as it was easier for one person to travel than 5, and she wasn’t really up to hosting. But i’ve been going back to my parents for Christmas day since I left Home at 18, and still do now with my own family.

I don't think it's anything new, we always went to grandparents when I was young.
And I don't think watching TV is Christmassy.
One good thing about visiting or having visitors is no tv!

We always went to grandparents, along with lots of aunts, uncles and cousins, we definitely didn't and still don't watch TV on Christmas Day.

We went to grandparents (or cousins) anything from a 2 hour drive to a 10 hour flight (they were wealthy and paid), this was the 70s.

We always went to my nans. We would get up and open presents. Whilst we were getting washed and dressed mum would put the turkey in. We would then walk to nans 5 minutes away. Everyone would be there and we would stay about an hour. Nan would then go home with one of us for lunch. I miss those days.

Now we live 100+ miles away from family so it’s facetime.