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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

CF alert - apparently iabu to not share my au pair

113 replies

WontShareMyAuPair · 19/12/2018 11:30

I was approached by a school mum today as she's having issues with holiday childcare yes, I know, she should have sorted it before the last day of term and she asked if our au pair could look after her DC whilst she was working on the days between Xmas and new year.

I said I think au pair has arranged a couple of meet ups with some of her friends during those days but would ask au pair of she'd rather babysit for CF to earn some extra money.

CF was aghast that she would be expected to pay my au pair to babysit her DC as "you guys already pay her for childcare, and you won't be needing her that week".

I just stood there and kind of stuttered a reply that that's not really how au pairs work and mumbled something about a local sport club providing a holiday activities that maybe her DC could go to. CF then flounced off and proceeded to glare at me across the playground.

OP posts:
Littleraindrop15 · 19/12/2018 11:31

😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂

She's batshit

RandomWok · 19/12/2018 11:33

She sounds like a twat. Who even does that? Are you even friends? What a cheeky fucker!

marvellousnightforamooncup · 19/12/2018 11:33
Shock

Batshit!

Merryoldgoat · 19/12/2018 11:34

Actual lolz 😆

Sexnotgender · 19/12/2018 11:34

She wanted your au pair to provide her with free childcare Confused yeah that’s not how that works Hmm

Therealjudgejudy · 19/12/2018 11:34

Wow. She is indeed a CF.

Avoid her op. You can't reason with crazy Grin

BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil · 19/12/2018 11:36

A) she’s a CF- my mind actually boggles at that logic.

B) I have terrible eyesight and when I read the title of the thread I thought it said ‘apparently iabu not to shave my au pair’ 🙈 need to go to Specsavers...

RandomObject · 19/12/2018 11:36

Whenever you see her glare at you just laugh out loud in a way that is clearly directed at her.

TheBabyAteMyBrain · 19/12/2018 11:40

Urgh I had this all the time when I nannied, like I did my job for the fun of it. Some of the faces when I handed out an invoice, how dare I expect to be paid for my time Hmm

silkpyjamasallday · 19/12/2018 11:43

What a dick. So unbelievably cheeky.

sirmione16 · 19/12/2018 11:46

Good for you for sticking up for your au pair!

CardsforKittens · 19/12/2018 11:47

It never fails to amaze me when someone thinks they can have someone else's time or labour for free and then gets upset at being told No. How do these people's thought processes work? It's bewildering.

sparechange · 19/12/2018 11:47

I've told this story before but my friend has a live-in nanny with a contract that says she can provide up to 2 nights of babysitting per week (which friend rarely uses)
The nanny also babysits for local families for £10ph

Friend's friend (CF) booked in the nanny for babysitting

A couple of nights after this, the nanny asked friend if she could help her get paid for the babysitting

Assuming CF had just forgotten, she sent her a reminder text

CF friend replied saying she wasn't going to pay her because her contract means she should do 2 nights babysitting per week, and if Friend wasn't using them, CF might as well Shock

Friend ended up paying the nanny herself, and cut all contact with the CF

AtrociousCircumstance · 19/12/2018 11:48

Christ. Who are these people?! Fucking hell.

Well done on saying no!

Pachyderm1 · 19/12/2018 11:49

SO CHEEKY!

Bekabeech · 19/12/2018 11:49

YANBU

(Even more so if it had been about shaving your au pair).

This person is batshit - I would tell others what she asked, if only to forewarn them.
I used to feel embarrassed when my DC went on a play date with someone's Nanny (they had far more fun than at my house).

Original poster
WontShareMyAuPair · 19/12/2018 11:50

@RandomWok not friends but we occasionally chat in the playground before pick up time, so friendly-ish.

@TheBabyAteMyBrain - there are more parents in the world who think like this CF??? Shock

OP posts:
PurpleWithRed · 19/12/2018 11:51

She does understand that slavery has been abolished and your au pair is not a possession ypu can lend out like a spare car seat or a lawnmower doesn't she?

NancyDonahue · 19/12/2018 11:52

'tis the season for cheeky fuckers WineXmas Grin

BitOutOfPractice · 19/12/2018 11:54

She wins the Christmas CF crown surely!

Just shows you how little people value childcare doesn't it?

Ironytheoppositeofwrinkly · 19/12/2018 11:55

Why do I never meet any of these people?! I'd LOVE to have a CF of my very own for entertainment. They seem to take the phrase 'if you don't ask, you don't get' far too literally.

TheBabyAteMyBrain · 19/12/2018 11:56

@WontShareMyAuPair unfortunately so. The grief I've been given over the past year because I've had my own child and am no longer available is ridiculous!

Phillipa12 · 19/12/2018 11:56

Reminds me of when i used to nanny. The nextdoor neighbour asked if i could babysit her 4 week old for a couple of hours whilst my mindees were at school, luckily she asked my male boss and he said that my going rate for newborns was £20 per hour and no she couldnt have me for free during schooltime.

PuppyMonkey · 19/12/2018 11:56

Excellent bit of CFery there, thanks for posting OP.Grin

arranbubonicplague · 19/12/2018 11:56

She does understand that slavery has been abolished and your au pair is not a possession ypu can lend out like a spare car seat or a lawnmower doesn't she?

It is a horrible and revealing insight into how some people would treat domestic staff and other service personnel if they had control over them. I sometimes think this when people are deploring documentaries about the way that domestic staff are treated in various countries.