To be shocked at this comment about poverty?

[abacucat]

I have been thinking for a few days about a comment a MNer made on a thread about poverty. She said that she has nearly been in tears because a woman at the toddler group she went to had a hole in her shoe and thus had wet feet.
I have a hole in my shoe. I got a wet foot today. I don't think this is a big deal or worthy of "nearly being in tears". Surely it is pretty normal to have to wait a bit to be able to afford to replace things like shoes?
I just do't see it as a big deal at all, and I think this comment was OTT.
AIBU?

@Winterberriesonatree, yes I would and do.

GreenDinosaur

I have been given to think that charity shops often throw away stuff that is no longer fashionable, but serviceable. I will now have a clear out. I have many decent shoes which are not worn out, but no longer fit because my bunions have flared up in the last two or three years, due to arthritis.

Charity shops sell shoes. There are also charities that take quite worn out shoes and mend them for the third world. Any shoes donated to charity shops that they don't want, they give to them.

Sorry about your bunions Winterberriesonatree, they must be so painful.

@Winterberries

I've bought a lot of good shoes from charity shops and I've also spent a lot of money on terrible fashionable shoes that I can only wear sitting down, not moving.

I only buy shoes from charity shops that look pretty unworn. Probably the ones that have been sitting at the back of a hoarders wardrobe for years!!

I’ve bought shoes from eBay where I am sure of the size and style.

@sweeneytoddsrazor

My thoughts exactly... some people need re-calibrating a little! ...

I've seen a few people say £30 isn't hard to budget for for shoes. We have £11 left after the bills and food shop to last till Thursday, with a toddler and baby. Where's the spare money from to save up with that? That needs saving for if the baby gets diarrhea and needs extra nappies for example, or if the toddler's shoes break and needs new ones, or if his coat breaks. Not for shoes for us

I have a hole in my shoes (not too bad yet) but I spend a decent amount on decent winter footwear that lasts every three + years so wouldn't be able to replace at the drop of a hat and kinda feel cheaper options are a false economy. I'm pretty poor but not so bad anyone needs to cry over it.

I've seen a few people say £30 isn't hard to budget for for shoes.

Some people have no understanding of poverty. It's clear from this thread that some don't understand relative poverty. Or that the vast majority of people are only 3 pay checks away from poverty.

As I said upthread, I do see not being able to buy new shoes when needed as poverty, that isn't a reflection on those in that situation but a reflection of how shit society is.

@abacucat Our family income is £17k (no benefits). We are lucky because we own our house and don't have a massive mortgage.

Apparently this income makes us 'poor' esp as we live in an expensive city but I don't think so. Most of our income goes on heating, food and bills but I feel very privileged.

Poverty means different things to different people and it's definitely relative. For most people, if you're living well below the standard which is considered average, you feel poor, even if you are not actually starving or living without heating.

I tend to measure poverty on a scale which includes how the poor live in other countries so even though we have quite a low income, I feel wealthy.

At the end of the day, what people are quite rightly upset about is not necessarily poverty, it's inequality. Some people have 100 + pairs of shoes and others have a hole in their only pair.

How the wealth is dished out is largely down to luck and there are no real mechanisms in our society to redress this. We are living in a giant Monopoly board game. Once you start acquiring money, you start to suck wealth from everyone around you and then you start blaming everyone else for being poor and lazy.

@mortifiedmama You're right. The outrage is the inequality and relative poverty. It does not need to be 'abject poverty' to be a really awful situation to be living in.

Not RTFT, but surely it depends on context.

If she was wearing shoes, knowing they have holes, because she cannot afford a new pair that is sad (though not tear-worthy). If however she found out at the group she had a hole in your shoe because her foot got wet that is not poverty - that is how a lot of people find out!

I have very large feet, so am very limited on where I can shop unless I want to wear ugly men's shoes. If I find a pair of shoes I like and which are comfortable I will wear them until they fall apart and no amount of re-soling will fix them. I am very fortunate and do not live in poverty - I just like my shoes and hate shopping.

I'm on a mums group on Facebook, fairly popular lots on MNers on and it seems to be a constant competition of how sad members are for poor people. This morning: "I've just heard 19,000 homes will get toy donations this year - I'm heartbroken this is awful I'm in tears". No you're not. This competitive wokeness is so fucking fake

Yes Gunpowder I agree there is alot of virtue signalling going on these days.

I'm not sure why anyone would be crying over it, I am a bit of a hard nosed bitch but we are bomabarded with pics of poverty on the tv .

I would feel empathy and pity for someone who was clearly struggling, most folks have been there, but I would not start crying or telling everyone I was crying, that's just ludicrous.

I think that's what gets me, they well up, then shrug it off and do fuck all to help. Two mins later they are grinning and buying shit.

I blame Tony Blair and Gordon brown for the muddying of what poverty means

If you cant afford a pair of £6 quid shoes in prim@rk then yes that is poverty. If you cant afford a £40 pair then no it isn`t, not in my world anyway.

Some of those toy drives only want brand new toys in their packaging.
Are the decent quality, nice condition, second-hand things I buy for my own DC not good enough for "those in need" then?

When I was younger/at uni, and supporting various people, £30 was more than a weeks worth of food for me. Ebay and charity shops has been my godsend - a few quid for shoes? yes please.

This is 2018 not 1820! Having to put up with holes in shoes because you cannot afford a new pair is a disgraceful comment on UK society and the crucifying austerity of eight years of the Tories.