To be shocked at this comment about poverty?

[abacucat]

I have been thinking for a few days about a comment a MNer made on a thread about poverty. She said that she has nearly been in tears because a woman at the toddler group she went to had a hole in her shoe and thus had wet feet.
I have a hole in my shoe. I got a wet foot today. I don't think this is a big deal or worthy of "nearly being in tears". Surely it is pretty normal to have to wait a bit to be able to afford to replace things like shoes?
I just do't see it as a big deal at all, and I think this comment was OTT.
AIBU?

I agree with you Shepherds.

I have 2 pairs of shoes & both pairs have holes in them I do a lot of walking, I’ve saved up for a new pair & they’ve given me really bad blisters on both my heels so I’m back to wearing my holey shoes.

I wouldn't worry too much, that lady probably didn't need or want her sympathy. The women might be perfectly happy or going through a bad patch. Who knows? That's life I suppose.

I had a hole in my converse, I only recently threw them out purely because they were comfy & went with most of my outfits. I too didn't realise this was a problem.

I agree that not to be able to afford a pair of shoes is poverty. It's not a normal thing having to walk around in shoes with holes in. This is not about forgetting to buy a new pair - this is about not being able to afford one. My heart goes out to everyone who says they prioitise what their children need or other essentials over shoes for themselves. You are amazing. However in one of the largest economies in the world no one - absolutely NO ONE - should be in this position and I appreciate that many families are in circumstances which are much worse. It's a disgrace in a civilised, wealthy country and I am ashamed that we collectively have let it come to this.

I only currently have one pair of shoes, no slippers, boots or trainers either, simply because my sons school uniform came first and there is no room in the budget after rent bills and food
Hoping after Xmas there will be the right pair at the right price in the charity shop in town
As for Primark, our nearest one is about 70 miles away!

Having said that, chilly though my shoes are at times, they don't have holes in them and we have everything we need

People who judge who dontt have enough money or say they should shouldn't own a flat screen TV etc are idiots. Anyone who judge others because their have financial difficulties should have a hard look at themselves. Everyone has different opportunities in life and nobody should be ashamed to be poor or to ask help. Wages vary so widely and someone working hard but earning minimum wage or similar will very likely struggle to keep on top of bills. Nothing to do with being lazy and no reason to be ashamed. The society should be ashamef of course this inequality.

nearly47 I have 3 pairs of shoes including my winter holey ones. Yes the average woman may have 2 or more pairs of shoes, but that will include sandals, flip flops, crocs. Absolutely fine during the summer, but not this time of year.

I'm shocked that so many people seem to think that having only one pair of shoes and that they have holes in is a normal state of affairs and it isn't poverty. It's nearly 2019 ffs!

It's all about circumstance and perspective. She probably hasn't traveled much. If she'd seen the favelas in Brazil or the shanty towns across Africa and India, she may have a different definition. I wouldn't judge..just pity her ignorance. She is blessed to live in such a wealthy world that a hole in a shoe is "poverty". Others may feel blessed to have seen far greater deprivation and need and who can therefore appreciate what a wonderful life we have on our small Island.

It doesn't automatically make the person poor if they have a hole in their shoe, it depends on the circumstances, maybe they didn't notice the hole, or is paid in a day or two so is waiting to repair 9r buy new shoes then. I do find it strange to be bought to tears without knowing the situation, did the person pull the apparent poor person to the side and offer to help?

Just to clarify, I'm not shocked that this happens; I'm shocked that people think it's normal. Nobody should have to live like that here and now.

Abacucat, I'd be embarrassed to feel you how many pair of shoes I own. And every woman I know probably own more than me. I don't buy them often but they last year's and I buy new ones because if new fashion or because old ones look a bit tired. I am but no means rich.
It might be that you a just frugal but it's not usual to wear shoes until they get holes.

*tell

Nearly

I'm with you....

@shepherdspieisminging.

It was an ot therapist that said she couldn’t formally diagnose my son because she wasn’t allowed. She then went on to write on a piece of paper.

Sensory vestibular system showing difficulties proprioception

Retained primitive reflexes atnr and stnr

Then she gave me it and said that this needs formally assessing and diagnosing and only a private ot could do this. I’m not stupid Iv phoned round numerous places and made umpteen enquires into this and with no luck. All I’m getting back is that he has numerous neurological problems due to when his heart stopped beating and spent 6 weeks in itc on life support when he was 4 month old. The damage done from lack of oxygen going to his brain is now becoming more apparent as he gets older.

I often have holes in my shoes, but I don’t prioritise footwear for me.

I often glue them at work too 😂
I do get attached to shoes though. I’m not poor but I’d need to wait for payday for shoes because I prioritise food, children etc.

I too didn't realise this was a problem

Were your converse your only pair of winter shoes and you were forced to wear them because you couldn't afford any other winter shoes? I'm assuming so or your post is irrelevant right?

If you have holes in your shoes and that’s the only pair you have, but cannot afford to replace them then I’d say that is someone living in poverty.

Pinkginhelps - why are you so determined to normalise the inability of someone to keep their feet warm and dry?!

I just don't understand the determination to see povert as normal. It's not and if we don't see it then we don't change it.

Pinkgin I’m well travelled and have seen plenty of poverty in other countries. It doesn’t make me feel less sad that some people are unable to afford new shoes I’m this country.

I too didn't realise this was a problem

You don't feel it's a problem to not be able to afford to wear shoes that are fit for purpose?! Why are you so accepting of this. You should be raging! I'm raging and my feet are cosy

You are poor - abacucat - if you only have one pair of shoes but not in poverty. I remember when young - I am 80 now - that a hole in my shoe was fixed by the insertion of cardboard, until a repair could be effected. Poverty is having no idea where the next meal is to be had - as you have no money to buy basic ingredients. At the same time, poverty is when your accommodation is at risk of you losing it, as you cannot pay due rent. Poverty is having no one to turn to for emergency help. Poverty is being just one month away for over 50% of low earners in the UK.

Lifesucksbutgorakeepgoing - Occupational therapists do diagnose within their remit e.g. dyspraxia and sensory processing disorder.
OT's who work for an LA are increasingly rare and IME are less likely to diagnose, which is possibly why you were told to go private.
You can apply for DLA without a diagnosis if you haven't already done so.

Shoes are increasingly not waterproof these days. I own several pair of shoes - only one keep my feet dry in wet weather.