Food “allergies” and buffets

[rose789]

On Boxing Day we’re hosting 18 people for a buffet and I was really looking forward to it.
Sent a message out a few weeks ago to ask if any one had any dietary requirements. One of my friends has Coeliac disease so I was already making as much stuff as possible gluten free, and I’m planning on having a separate table for food that contains gluten to prevent cross contamination. All fine and dandy.
Couple of people have a shellfish allergy- no problem I won’t serve any.

My friends girlfriend messaged today. Backstory; they’ve been dating about 18 months, love my friend she’s a sweetheart but her girlfriend is so high maintenance. Everything has to be about her, there always has to be some drama every time we get together. I don’t like the woman but I always try to make an effort for my friends sake.

So she messaged this morning, to say that she couldn’t have gluten or wheat as she was allergic (crying face emojis galore)
I don’t believe her at all (I know I sound like bitch) but I have seen her eat gluten before (and recently) and she certainly didn’t show any ill effects. Messaged back to say not to worry friend X has ceoliac so there will be gf options.
Obviously didn’t give her the response she was looking for as she responded oh and did I tell you I was vegan?
Fuck off are you!! You decided to be vegan over night- nah mate.
I really want to respond back saying not to bother coming, but that will play right into her hands and give her the drama she wants. I think the only thing I can do is a message saying if she had told me this on X date when I asked I would have catered but it’s too late now. There will be salad on the table but she is welcome to bring her own food.
WWYD? And AIBU to want to punch her in the throat right now

Barbarian I usually use vinaigrette for potato salad which solves the problem.

Sorry - just read your latest update Rose789! DP has the right idea lol

I find people who have genuine allergies / dietary requirements offer this information up readily and are easy to cater for or they often offer to bring some stuff themselves.

Asking about allergies/dietary requirements tends to bring out the drama llamas!

Hope your party goes well OP!

www.tesco.com/groceries/en-GB/products/280966505

Vegan and gluten free.

Oh and watch her like a hawk - if she tried to sneak any gluteny non-vegan food, slap it dramatically out of her hand to protect her from her mistake!

Also tell her the booze isn’t vegan

This x10!

I know a few people with complex dietary needs (multiple allergies combined with dislikes and/or ethics) but they are invariably sensible about it, offer to bring their own food, give plenty of notice.
Attention-seekers, on the other hand, will tell you on arrival and then spend half the event virtue-signalling about how 'thoughtless' other people are regarding food, if you haven't been lucky enough to have already prepped a wide range.

Sounds like my sil. She’s veggie apart from a chicken diner on sundays, bacon, turkey at Christmas & the beef & duck she ate at my wedding, where she studiously ignored the veggie option buffet and another guest took it home in her hat despite not being veggie.

Don’t worry, her relationships don’t last long.

Annoying as it is, you’d best keep some off to the side OR - possibly better, in these circs? - loudly announce that she must get her food before anyone else touches the table as she’s vegan & GF & cross-con from latter could obviously make her Terribly Ill. Perfect time for you to apologise profusely about not having been able to get hold of any vegan alcohol, too...

Not that I harbour any bitterness at all towards people who are foodfaddy (as opposed to having either true allergies/intolerances/coeliacs &/or actual ethical convictions flexitarianism my actual arse ) or anything. Nooooooo.

I would just message back "ok" and do what you were going to do already.

God, so many unreasonable and bitchy comments... You decided to invite people and cater for them. You asked for her dietary requirements and she gave them... But she's somehow in the wrong?! Fair enough it sounds like you just don't like her but you did invite her!

A lot of the things mentioned here aren't gluten free and/or vegan when shop bought even if you might expect them to be - e.g. a lot of shop bought guacamole contains dairy.

Tbh, as a coeliac I'd prefer to bring my own food in a buffet type situation, as unless the hosts are also coeliac, gluten is hidden away in many unexpected places which can catch out the unsuspecting.

I don’t believe her at all (I know I sound like bitch) but I have seen her eat gluten before (and recently) and she certainly didn’t show any ill effects. Messaged back to say not to worry friend X has ceoliac so there will be gf options.

Someone who is actually coeliac would never ever eat anything containing even the tiniest trace of gluten - if they inadvertently did so, they would have a very negative reaction very quickly.

A lot of people these days are claiming to be 'gluten intolerant' which isn't the same thing at all, and according to several experts, is quite rare. I'm guessing your 'friend' belongs to the latter group.

A couple of years ago at a very big family get together, one family member brought her supposedly vegan bloke. He was actually pretty easy, though I did make him separate roast pots with no goose fat.

So we were startled on Boxing Day morning when he said he was going to poach a couple of eggs - would anyone else like any?

'Er, I thought you were vegan!'
'Well, more of a veggan, really, as long as they're free range, of course.'

Stick some potato waffles in toaster. Plus baked beans. Voila. Gf and vegan

If she's genuinely coeliac this wouldn't work as the toaster has presumably been used to toast 'normal' bread, and even the tiniest trace of gluten can have horrible consequences for coeliacs.

As I mentioned above, however, I suspect that she is not in fact coeliac. Only 1% of the population is.

I asked everyone 3 weeks ago when I started planning and doing online shopping to be delivered on the 23rd. If someone was genuinely a vegan it wouldn’t have been a problem and I would have catered for them.
She’s clearly lying if you had genuine food restrictions you would respond with I’m gf and vegan. Not oh I’m gf, wait for a response, oh I’m vegan.

For the gf buffet it’s my best friend/ old housemate who’s gf and I’ve been cooking for her for years so I’m 100% confident that the buffet I make will be fine. I’m just keeping the non gf options separate to avoid cross contamination as people don’t realize even something as simple as touching the serving spoon of something gf to their gluteny plate could contaminate the whole dish.

Sorry I’m new here the last post was in response to Roobub

This would drive me potty. I had people over in the summer. Two of whom were vegetarian. I catered specifically for them (seperate barbecue, veggie kebabs, halloumi kebabs and lots of other things) They ate all the veggie food and then had chicken kebabs and sausages that were for the meat eaters!

She failed to mention her dietary requirements at the first invite?

She will have to suck it up. As you say much of the stuff will be GF anyway and naturally, much is vegan. Being vegan is not a medical condition.

Just ask her to bring her own choice of vegan booze.

Harsh. She should've let you know.

If coeliac you have to be very careful about what ready-made food you buy - most oven chips have a coating with wheat.

It sounds like a good plan, even gf and vegetarian pre-prepared food is hard to source. Salads and dips sound like a good plan and gf eating first. I dislike buffets the most as people just don't get cross-contamination. Some alcohol is not gluten free so agree to ask her to bring her own.

Oh and look out for gluten in stock cubes. Took me a while to realise that one.

Maybe she’s being a bit dramatic but why assume she’s lying? Some people are gf and vegan. And it’s much more of a challenge for them than it is for you to cater for one night. I hosted a celiac lactose-intolerant person last week and made pizza. (Cauliflower crust, vegan cheese).

Can’t you get her something more than salad and crudités? There are tonnes of alternative food options in Sainsbury’s. And surely not all the planned food has animal products in it?

Jeez I'm an unfussy simple vegetarian and even I offer to contribute the vegetarian options!

*punch her in the throat'

Fucking hell.