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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not take him his ID

108 replies

MeredithGrey1 · 14/12/2018 23:08

My DP has his work Christmas party tonight, which is a dinner out at a restaurant, drinks in various pubs and then on to a club. I (obviously) have no issue with any of this and would never try to stop him going out and enjoying his Xmas party.

He’s just texted to say he’s realised he’s left his driving licence (his only form of ID) on his desk at home, and he’s hinting pretty strongly that he wants me to drive it to him. He’s 27 so he’s not had any issue drinking at the restaurant or pubs, it’s just needed for the club as they will ID everyone on the way in and he definitely won’t get in without it and will have to come home early.

AIBU to say I don’t want to get out of bed and go out in the freezing cold to take it to him (would be about a 30 min round trip)? They’re not going to the club until about midnight so he’s still had the majority of the Xmas party. I’m pregnant so he knows I haven’t drunk anything and therefore am able to drive, and we don’t have any children so there really is no reason why I can’t leave the house. I feel a bit guilty as I know he was looking forward to tonight, and he doesn’t go out often, but at the same time I just really don’t want to go out.

OP posts:
garethsouthgatesmrs · 14/12/2018 23:10

YANBU. just dont reply and he will think you are asleep. If he is desperate he can get a taxi

IwillrunIwillfly · 14/12/2018 23:10

I'd probably take him it. Let him have his big night out since it will likely be his last for a while! But remind him of it when you get a notion for chocolate late one night and he has to go out and get you some!

Allthewaves · 14/12/2018 23:11

Not a hope would I be going out

ohwownosnow · 14/12/2018 23:11

Absolutely do not take it to him! His fault. I'd be telling DH this too in my reply.

RB68 · 14/12/2018 23:11

I personally wouldn't its late you are tired and it is bloody cold out there and as you say you are already in bed. He will just have to get himself home and take his ID next yr although he will be a parent by then and somewhat tireder!!

ScreamingValenta · 14/12/2018 23:13

Do 27 year olds really get asked for ID at clubs nowadays? I haven't been to a club for about 15 years so this is a genuine question.

Avegemitesandwich · 14/12/2018 23:13

I know this is lame, but I think I would take it to him. If he doesn't go out much and had been looking forward to it, and was otherwise a good partner, I think I would.

Would he do it for you OP?

AnneLovesGilbert · 14/12/2018 23:13

Ha! If it was so important he’d have bothered to remember to take it.

You’re asleep aren’t you? Carrying his baby and getting some well earned rest Grin

Peoniesandcats · 14/12/2018 23:13

I agree with you, just tell him you're sure it will be fine and to have a nice night. Then tell him goodnight as you're going to sleep as really tired and achy x

TrippingTheVelvet · 14/12/2018 23:14

I would but me and DW both tend to make conscious effort to do little kind things that. I'd probably undo all my goodness by saying ffs to her though!

TrippingTheVelvet · 14/12/2018 23:15

*like that

twoundertwo54321 · 14/12/2018 23:19

I would take it to him.

Amanduh · 14/12/2018 23:20

I’d take it to him. He’s 15 mins down the road.

igot99problems · 14/12/2018 23:20

I would take it to him. I would want him to enjoy his night out..and the spirit of Christmas and all that..

Puggles123 · 14/12/2018 23:21

I would, but only as I know he would do the same for me (and has). If you’re not feeling up to it though just tell him, if you ignore I’ll bet he’ll just keep pestering!

Puggles123 · 14/12/2018 23:21

I know my partner would, obviously not OPs!

MaderiaCycle · 14/12/2018 23:22

I'd take it. Once the baby arrives it will be a completely different game.

boringlyboring · 14/12/2018 23:22

My DP bought my ID to me one night, it wasn’t even a special night out just a regular Saturday. I don’t even think we lived together at that point (it’s all a blur), but I’m sure he went to my nans to get it and then came to town to me. I’d do the same tbh

MsJolly · 14/12/2018 23:23

I wouldn’t if I was already in bed. I’d just pretend I was already asleep and didn’t get the messageXmas Grin

Weenurse · 14/12/2018 23:24

I would be asleep

winecigsandchoc · 14/12/2018 23:24

I'd take it and bank it as an IOU for the future!

AmyDowdensLeftLeftShoe · 14/12/2018 23:25

@ScreamingValenta - some places ID everyone even if you are old enough to be the parent of some of the people in your group.

And yes OP I would take it to him. Why? When you have a toddler and want to go on a big night out you can remind him of this.

PippaPug · 14/12/2018 23:25

Can you call a taxi and ask the driver to deliver it? I have asked drivers to deliver school bags and presents etc

Parky04 · 14/12/2018 23:27

Nope I wouldn't expect this of my DW. I would just come home if I couldn't get in. However, I always have my driving licence with me.

Mookie81 · 14/12/2018 23:29

I don't understand why someone would be so shitty to their partner.
It's down the road not Timbuktu.
Haven't you ever forgotten something? Why would you let his night be ruined, you're not disabled or incapacitated for God's sake.

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