To think ALL presents shouldn't be from Santa?

[justsparklex]

Surely it's not just me who thinks this is odd? I wasn't even aware people did this. So I messaged my friend asking if it was okay to come up Xmas evening with the kids and we can all then exchange presents, my friend replied saying " you can come up Xmas evening but can you drop the presents off before so dc's have all their presents in the morning" because apparently ALL their presents are from Santa. I was like What?? I understand people have certain traditions, but I just can't get my head over this one. I tell my kids that a few presents are from santa(usually less expensive ones) and the rest are from mummy&daddy and family, Santa just stores them and delivers them. I wasn't aware she didn't this until this year as I've usually just dropped them off before anyway.

I just think what's the point in even buying her kids anything if they don't even know it's from me? Why should Santa get all the credit? I just thought, do whatever you like with presents from you and your DH but family and friends?I think their kids deserve to know who bought them. I've bought them both two lovely, thoughtful and quite expensive presents and I'm just sad they won't even know it's from us. AIBU!?

I think the issue comes with 'why did santa get Tommy an x box but not me?' Or the' what do you mean it doesn't exist? why can't Santa just make a Lego Mosasaur? ' as I had last year! We have stockings and one present from their list from Santa and everything g else from family. We buy all Santa's stuff.

My mum always did most of the presents were from her but 1 present was wrapped in different wrapping paper with a note from Santa and that was from him. It was still as magical and exciting but I appreciated my mum for her presents. I'll do the same with my children.

I wonder where she hides all the presents before christmas and none of her kids have ever found them. Only the stockings are from santa in our house

Here Santa brings one present under the tree and stockings.
Everyone has their traditions/own way of doing things I guess so I couldn't get worked up if some people put all of theirs from Santa. Each to their own!
She is being unreasonable to dictate to you that you should put from Santa though. Can't see why they can't have all theirs from Santa and then others from other people... do their kids not say thank you to family etc for presents?!

Urgh. I HATE when this happens. My ex is the same. We were buying for his niece and nephew and had to sign the tag ‘from Father Christmas’

I left it to him to explain to his nephew and niece why WE hadn’t bought them anything.

My daughter knows that Santa gives her the presents in her stocking and the bigger presents come from us or other family members.

It’s so horrible hearing some children in the playground saying Santa got them an electric scooter whilst my daughter received a couple of games / books etc.

I would do what other posters have said and give them their gift in January.

Everything from Santa in our house as I said earlier. We've never done presents for the extended family beyond grandparents, and don't get any from them either. So no need for written thank yous, I am relieved to say.

There are plenty of phone calls to the grandparents thanking them personally for their contribution, which is financial. They write a cheque because they are no longer very mobile and don't go shopping as they used to.

No it is not IamSusan it is completely true. Children talk in the playground, little Johnny tells his friend he got an iPad for Christmas from Santa, whilst his friend got a secondhand toy from Santa, and wonders what he did wrong as he got a cheap present!

Parents etc do the big presents, Santa does the small stocking presents.

My DD stopped believing at 7 (long story but involved a stroppy child of another religion). Even before we stressed that she could make a wish list and Santa brought ONE thing. I the rest is from mom and dad. It works for us and she never thought she was getting endless gifts from a man in the north pole.

When I was a child Santa brought all the gifts to the house overnight on Christmas Eve so they were in a pillowcase at the bottom of my bed when I woke up. BUT all the gifts were from family members. There was never a gift directly from Santa.

I never questioned that he was basically just a postman or how he got all the gifts from all my different relatives.

I always wrote my thank you notes to everyone on Boxing Day - so those who get all the gifts from Santa don't have to write thank you notes to everyone!

I remember back in the 1980's, my stocking from 'Santa' had cheap stocking fillers and sweets, whilst mum and dad bought the bigger presents.

Santa brings stockings only in our house. Everything else comes from the actual giver.

It's OK to say all presents from parents are from Santa, but not other people! It's not just bizarre, it's very rude actually as the children won't be thanking the people who bought them the gifts.

Weird! Only small stocking fillers are from Santa in this house. Anything else is big and expensive and from mum and dad, grandparents and friends - credit where it’s due. I was also brought up with Christmas like this and never thought to question it.

Probably I’m being unreasonable here but I find the phrase “Santa presents” to be almost as cringe-inducing as the dreadfully twee and po-faced rhyme “Something to wear...”

All my friends seem to do it the same way we do it, and everyone did it that way when we were growing up (FC as delivery man, that is.)

We have very little money. We shrimp and save for the things they get. They certainly don’t come from Santa. We each have a small stocking with a few small essentials and some treats. We also get a family game. They come from Santa. Presents from others (grandparents, aunties, friends) come from them too.
They have the magic but I think it’s important they understand that we work hard for our money, and that expensive things don’t just fall out of the sky.

The only time anyone should really care is if it's one of their presents.

It really makes no difference to anyone what the parents do.

It definitely matters what other parents do....it always does...because my child will be growing up in a world full of people who think if you are good you get gifts....which is a toxic world view and causes no end of misery when you think about it.

Well not everyone does it like that.

I don't do things the way a lot of other people do but I don't dictate to others what to tell their children.

It's easily explained to a young child anyway. If a child tells your child they've been told they have to be good to get a present won't effect me in any way.

When I was a child we got stockings from Father Christmas and all the gifts under the tree were from family and friends (and each gift giver had to be sent a hand written thank you letter).
My husband's family had everything from Santa which I've never understood. Why should a made up character get all the credit? Especially as my parents in law put themselves into debt every year to get the gifts. Our first Christmas together I was a bit surprised not to get thank you notes from his nieces and nephews but that's just not the way they do it in their family and that doesn't bother me.
We don't have children but if we did I think I would do it the way my family did. Partly cos I want my imaginary children to thank the people who've bought them gifts and partly because I think it's unfair that Father Christmas seems to bring different children different valued items.

haunted it WILL affect you, or your children sooner of later.

The world is full of people who attribute their good luck to their own virtue and effort. All those millions of...'well you just have to try hard and life will deliver success' people who have no empathy or compassion for people who have done exactly what they have, worked every bit as hard, and ended up in the gutter, often due to mental or physical illness or accident outside their control.

And the worst part is being that person who has been kind, and worked hard, and always implicitly understood that this means good things should come their way....and then they don't. And you are left thinking it must be MY FAULT that my mental health collapsed, or that they I cancer, or that my child got ill...because bad things only happen to bad people right?

Do your kids a life long favour and don't reinforce the toxic message this christmas!

OP write who the present is from on the present (not on a tag) in glittery pen. Just to be on the safe side

This (or refusing to give the present until after Christmas). If people want to make all their presents from Santa fine, if FC is a glorified delivery man fine. But it is not fine to take tags off a present and then pretend it came from you/Santa. Your friend is a CF.

wonders what he did wrong as he got a cheap present!

It's depressing if you think a child young enough to believe in Santa and magic has to understand the value and price of things that way. Mine wouldn't have a clue if their toys come from a charity shop or from Harrods when they the boxes on Christmas morning!

Yes, they all need to know that you can't get everything you want, there's always a friend who will have something you won't, that's life, but let the poor mitts be kids!

I find these judgmental posts really boring. Our tradition is that all presents come from Father Christmas - and guests bring gifts when they visit, for which you thank them, and we exchange a small item each. You are not part of my celebrations, why should I care what you think I should do?

Stop comparing everything and make yourself miserable, if you are that convinced you are doing things the right and only way, why are you so insecure? Most of us hope to have a nice day off, no sickness, no injury no death around Christmas if at all possible, with the heating on would be a huge bonus. Being obsessed with the material aspect and the price of the presents is a sad way to see things.

M3lon I had the 'toxic' message that FC gave all the presents (not family ones). I have not, in any shape or form turned out like your post suggests I should.

Mine are never told about naughty or good and presents are always unconditional.

However they don't get big ticket items at Christmas, if it is needed (or wanted) then we get it, so we had a PS4 on Black Friday and I have just replaced ds's tablet. DD had a phone last Christmas but that was after a discussion with her and she knows it is me anyway.