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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be on the floor devastated

281 replies

TheSheepofWallSt · 01/12/2018 20:57

That my only-just two year old has started to call me “mum” not “mummy”?

Happy to be handed a grip, because I’m ridiculously (very unusually for me) sad over this!

OP posts:
Jaffacakebeast · 01/12/2018 23:13

My 12ds son still calls me mummy (at home)

MysteryNameChange · 01/12/2018 23:16

3 year old DD is currently calling me and her dad by our names... I've told her 'I'm Mummy' which she responded 'yes but you are also called Mystery' Confused I'd be happy with Mum

CajunShrimp · 01/12/2018 23:19

Mine does this!! And I’m pretty sure it’s because she knows I don’t like it. Bloody threenagers. I just ignore her until she says ‘mummy’. I think she got it from CBeebies.

KittensAndChristmasCake · 01/12/2018 23:21

Sorry to hear about the cat 😰 You could say it was really really old (even if it wasn't) and has gone to heaven, or if not, go with the Garfield thing, as mentioned above.

My 19yo calls me "Muvvah" ( he sounds like something from a dodgy Krays film extra)

Must be a teen thing, my boys went from 'mummy' to calling me this 🙄

Imustbemad00 · 01/12/2018 23:22

Can somebody help me out with the what/pardon thing. I’m not fussed about either, but I can understand people preferring pardon m, for example, if you’ve misheard someone and want them to repeat something.
But surely ’what’ can to be used in some scenarios..
“Dd1” (calling from other room)
“What?”
“Dinners ready”
Pardon wouldn’t even make sense there.

Original poster
TheSheepofWallSt · 01/12/2018 23:23

@Imustbemad00

In that scenario I’d prefer a “yes?”

OP posts:
littlemisscomper · 01/12/2018 23:23

Oh I'm so sorry to hear about your mum's cat! That's dreadful.

Original poster
TheSheepofWallSt · 01/12/2018 23:26

@littlemisscomper

I know... he was a rescue (quite an identifying story behind how she by the cat- think “left in a wheeliebin” sort of thing) and less than a year old. He was hit by a car and just left in the middle of the road. DM is beside herself... Sad

OP posts:
Rockhopper81 · 01/12/2018 23:32

I call my mum, “mum”, which is actually very unusual here in the Midlands where “mom” is the usual term. But then, I also use long a vowels (grass, path, after etc.) and don’t have a Midland accent (not deliberately ‘lost’ either, it just seemed to miss me).

I use ‘pardon’ or ‘excuse me’ or ‘sorry, what’ - I’m with TheSheepofWallSt in that “what” on its own sounds rude to me (and generally sounds rude or exasperated when said by children). As mentioned, I would say, “yes?” in the above scenario too. Smile

CharDeeMacDennis · 01/12/2018 23:32

My DS asked me really politely when he was 7 if I would mind if he called me Mum, he was so sweet about it. Of course I said he could if he wanted.

Some on here do fall over themselves to point out which words and phrases are terribly common, or worse, bourgeois and which are "correct" (posh), as if anyone should give a toss.

sophisticatedsarcasm · 01/12/2018 23:36

My boy called me By my real name from aged 3-5. I win 🤣

Rockhopper81 · 01/12/2018 23:41

Oh, with regards to the cat OP - honesty at an age appropriate level is generally the best way to go. So, the cat was very, very poorly/hurt/injured (depending on how your son will understand it) and couldn’t stay with us anymore. Also, acknowledge how sad it is that he (cat) isn’t here anymore and that it’s okay to be sad about it. Death is a difficult topic and concept for toddlers, but I think it’s better they have an age appropriate form of the truth.

I second Goodbye Mog - it’s sad, but talks about how tired Mog was all the time and then how she died.

When my oldest nephew was 2, his great grandmother died - I vividly remember him saying in the car that she had gone now, and that his daddy was sad about it, and how he was sad. He understood, but took it remarkably well.

AutumnEvenings · 01/12/2018 23:42

We got to a point where our Yorkshire born kids called me "Mother" as teenagers. Yes Mother, Not at all Mother.

I took the P out of them something shocking, until they reverted to "Mum, mum, mum tell him". I thought it was just me until recently in a supermarket I heard a kid go " Mum, mum, mum!". I really thought it was my DS and then remembered that he is 32 and now lives in London. When he gets home it is still Mum, mum, mum... He has asked for a PS4 for Xmas so still a little kid at heart.

My husband is still referred to as "ask your Da". I am from Northern Ireland originally and and the man of the family was usually known as "the auld Da" or "he's the Da". Older Women in Belfast were called "auld dolls". "The auld doll said we could all come round for Sunday dinner". Husband from Manchester always said "me ol' fella", daughter's BF from M'bro talks about "our Mam".

So long as it is affectionate it is fine.

WobblyWomblingChristmas · 01/12/2018 23:47

I recently had this conversation with DS. My DGD (8) had asked if she can call them mum & dad instead of mummy & daddy. They are not happy!
My friend (50s) still calls her mum mummy ..

StableGenius · 01/12/2018 23:50

I was 10 when I self-consciously wrote 'mum' instead of 'mummy' in a card but I felt I was betraying myself and it was just what I was meant to say Sad. It was a really horrible feeling actually.

I'm still 'mummy' to dc aged 15 and 13 Grin.

EyUpOurKid · 01/12/2018 23:58

DS is two and calls me "Darlink" like a tiny fabulous male toddler Zsa Zsa Gabor.

rubyroot · 02/12/2018 00:04

Pardon is for burps/farts isn't it?

Heh heh, that's funny Grin

iamthere123 · 02/12/2018 00:10

Just wait until the inevitable 'Mother' when you are really annoying them as an adult! I use 'mother' in the same way as my mum used my full name to denote I was in trouble as a kid!

HalfBloodPrincess · 02/12/2018 00:22

My ds is 18 months and doesn’t have any words yet. I’d give anything to hear him call me mum Sad

Could you tell ds the cat had gone on holiday? Could make up a story like his brother lives in Australia so he’s gone to stay with him? Make it something fun

llangennith · 02/12/2018 00:45

Sorry about the cat. Young children get over things quicker than grownups so long as you're not over-emotional when you tell her. "The car ran out into the road and got hit by a car and died."
When DC were very little and an older family member died we'd say it was because they were REALLY old.

abacucat · 02/12/2018 00:58

I remember at 5 getting told by other kids at school that mummy was babyish so switching to mum. Have used mum ever since.

whatsnewchoochoo · 02/12/2018 01:09

Mines called me mum since he was about 15 months. I quite like it.. it's like he's decided to forge an adult relationship with me already Grin

DH is still dada

jxnx · 02/12/2018 01:14

My DS mid teens middle child hates his sisters calling me mum or writing it in cards as far as he's concerned I'm mummy end off lol

Magenta46 · 02/12/2018 01:14

Mine called me by my first name until they were 3. Then it was Mom and now Mummy

MotherForkinShirtBalls · 02/12/2018 01:58

EyUpOurKid, your ds sounds fantastic Grin. I'm momma if the dc are talking about me (or really want something) and mum if they are talking to me. I really dislike mummy so it suits me fine. Any chance from the baby stages can be hard though, so I hope it settles back to a name you're happier with, Op.

And condolences about the cat. When 2yo dd's best friend dog (granny's and she was actually very wary of him!) she was distraught. We talked about how he was star dust and part of him was in the stars. She looked out for him at night for quite a while and seemed to take comfort in it.