Why did my birthday become a horror?

[Ilikeknitting]

So everyone has been making a big fuss about my birthday, it was a ‘biggy’ , and it ended up being a fiasco.
Dh had booked a ‘romantic getaway’, before we even arrived at our hotel we argued, more than once, and Dh said “do you want to go home” and I said “YES”, so be honest, would you have said the same? I mean, who would have said “ er, no, even after arguing I want to go to our ‘romantic’ destination “
Ordinarily, my husband and I have an amazing relationship , but one argument and he drove me home! and he’s struggling with why im being shitty it was my birthday ‘treat’ and it started so well, but I have been promised so much, I really don’t want to share a bed with him tonight. Our hotel room is empty, it’s in a bloody castle! I mean, a fucking castle!.... , I’m home and got Strictly on telly, that’s not what was promised, even this morning he was saying “ tomorrow morning you are in for a treat”

Yes, today was wonderful, and I had ‘forgiven’ him. Until the final bloody argument. He threw a strop at 9am because. I asked him to put the laundry on the clothes horse whilst I fed the cats! (We needed to be away at 9) He threw another tantrum because I didn’t tell him how his car seat should be (it was in the wrong position after the car was valeted)
Am I so wrong?

Yes. You sound like a bit of a fucking nightmare. HTH.

Get off Mumsnet and talk to him, Princess

I can't really work out what's happened. You were on your way to a hotel, argued on the way, he asked if you wanted to go home, you said yes, so he turned around and you went home? Seems like a monumental waste of everyone's time.

Perhaps he was being unreasonable, perhaps you were, it's impossible to say from that info!

You sound awful. If I were your dh I’d have dropped you home and enjoyed a night in a lovely castle with a bath and room service.

He asked you if you wanted to go home.

You said yes.

He took you home.

YABU.

Why didn’t you get over yourself and stay in the castle.

Can't figure out the bit about car seats. But he asked if you wanted to go home, you said yes, and he took you home. What was he supposed to do, take you against your will to the castle?

It became a horror because you sound over emotional. There’s obviously something deeper to this and you need to think about what that might be. If you want to salvage this birthday you should be talking to your husband. I’m thoroughly confused as to why you’re angry with your husband for taking you home when you said you wanted to go home. I think you need to admit partial responsibility for this shit show

Its a shame you wont be able to brag about your #birthdaytreat #castle #luckygirl #hesakeeper on Insta, I agree.

‘Do you want to go home?’
‘Of course not, let’s move on and have a nice time.’

Problem solved.

Why don’t you go there now. You could still get there and enjoy it.

Sounds like a stress argument over nothing. Sorry to say it but you are behaving like a child who tantrums at their birthday party. You really should have de-escalated it when he asked you if you wanted to go home.

Don't get me wrong. DH annoys the fuck out of me quite often but sometimes it's better to just say sorry and make up.

He asked you what you wanted to do and then did it.

What you wanted was for him to grovel and beg and he wasn’t prepared to play this time.

Say what you mean - it’s important.

Don’t play manipulative games - they’re unhealthy.

There’s no right side here.

Have an honest chat, take responsibility if it was your fault. Any chance you can set off again?....hotel should be geared to late arrivals and you could still have a lovely morning tomorrow.

You seem to have cut off your own nose.

Agree... So when he asked if you wanted to go home, and you said 'yes' he was meant to say 'suck it up buttercup, I'm taking you whether you like it or not!' ?

'Do you want to go home?'

'No, drop me at the castle, then you fuck off home.'

Sorted!

If it's 40 absolutely everyone has a shit time for that one. I wrote it off and celebrated 41 instead.

Why did you say you wanted to go home? DH and I tend to argue whenever we go away. We lead such stressful lives that as soon as we’re ‘let loose’ we tend to turn on each other. So I do understand where you’re coming from OP and you don’t deserve the bitchy replies that have unfortunately, become a regular occurrence on mumsnet. Ignore them.

@Alpaca - I had a fab time .

You are pissed off at him because he did what you said you wanted?

I think you should look for a psychic clairvoyant to be DH no. 2

This is a reverse.

Why don't you just go to him now and say: "I didn't mean what I said before about not wanting to stay in the hotel overnight. I'd actually like to move on from our earlier arguments and go away and enjoy the rest of my birthday. Can we go?"

You asked him to take you home he did. You got what you wanted.

So what do you want to do now?

Fuck that grovelling! If you want to go set off on your own and pamper yourself in the room. Don’t beg the fucker.