To be upset with teachers?

[NoChocolateThanks]

My DS (Y1) came from school today and told me'Mum,you forgot to pay for 'Beauty and the Beast' '.
The thing is,I didn't forget, it was bugging me for the last week. According to the letter from school, they organised trip for kids to watch spectacle as their current topic is fairy tales. It's in our local theatre and cost £10(it says 'voluntary contribution'),they're going just before Christmas.
I am inclined not to send him as we are financially struggling at the moment, and on the other hand I just feel that the whole outing is totally unnecessary at this time of the year.School knows full well that people in this area are not financially comfortable,yet they feel it's perfectly acceptable to remind the kid that their parent didn't cough up for trip.
Sorry for a rant.

Nice try, OP

If it’s voluntary why didn’t you just tell the school you weren’t paying?

What do you mean,Professor ?

So you expect the staff to be psychic?

If you can’t make any sort of contribution towards the cost then you need to inform school of that.

But also worth remembering if enough people don’t pay then the trip will be cancelled

It's a lovely thing to do at Christmas

Sirzy,of course they are not psychics but they have my phone number and see me every day.

Erm you have to tell them. Then they will fund if they can. Usually you return the slip sans money

And you have their phone number and see them everyday! Communication works both ways after all.

Yeah, sure it does. I spoke to his teacher yesterday about the deadline and she said till next week

Oh, I genuinely thought you were joking.

We like all the children to have the opportunity to attend trips. Most struggling parents tend to priotise their children, as I've done myself. School trips are part of having children - surely you knew that before you had them?

When else would you go to a pantomime?

Nice drip feed there. So why didn’t you mention then you may struggle to pay?

You do realise that people delaying paying or letting them know they can’t rosks the trip for everyone?

Agree you need to tell the school if you’re struggling to afford the trip.

They can’t know whether you’re a parent who can’t afford it or a parent who hasn’t got round to it unless you tell them.

And also, if you didn’t mention struggling to pay when you spoke to the teacher about the deadline, she probably assumed that struggling to pay wasn’t an issue. Because if it’s an issue , why not mention it then?

I’m not sure why you’re annoyed at the teachers? Is it for asking for money, or is it for telling your child to remind you?

I totally understand that money is tight, and it may place a burden on you. But tell them what’s going on - it does say voluntary, so just tell them you can’t afford it.

Professor,people circumstances change
Mrskears theatres are open 5 days a week, whole year
Sirzy yeah,just add more to my already sky high anxiety, thanks

I'm not sure why you're being so defensive, if you knew you couldn't afford it, you should've spoken to the teacher at the first possible opportunity, as you've just asked her when the deadline is she probably thinks you just forgot. They need to know in advance how many want to go and how many can't afford to pay to make sure they can cover the costs, seems pretty reasonable.

Thanks Hope and Rosie,I think it's just an element of shame that stops me.

of course they are not psychics but they have my phone number and see me every day.

And they have a million and one things to be thinking about and 29 other children to remember things about. You only have yours.

They sent the letter. If you can't make the voluntary payment (which is fair enough) it is your responsibility to tell them. Not theirs to chase you for it.

Can you afford £5 towards the trip OP?

Yeah you're not being unreasonable OP, it is the equivalent of pester power and in an area where many parents are struggling you would think teachers would have more sense.

Professor talking about prioritising in such a PA manner assumes that the person is making a conscious decision to spend on something frivolous...when perhaps the money was spent on rent or food.

I don't think they will approach you in the playground to ask about payment because its A. its voluntary B. could embarrass you if you are unable to pay
Have you sent the permission slip back yet ? If not send it back without any money , that's all you have to do

Yes but pantos are a Xmas thing are they not?

I think it's just an element of shame that stops me

I understand that. They won't think badly of you though. Seriously. Of all the things teachers do care about - parents who don't read with their children; children arriving at school late and not ready to learn; lack of cleanliness; hunger... this is really not one of them. I promise you that.

If you can't afford to pay, just return the slip sans payment. They will still allow your child to go on what sounds like a lovely pre Christmas treat. The teachers aren't doing it to cause problems, but to do something nice for the children. Just think of it in that way.

Mrskeats,possibly, I just can't think of Christmas atm, I've lost 4 very close people since September (including my DF,my Gran and BF).It's just not the same this year.
I'm sorry my mind is so messed up.