To be upset with teachers?

[NoChocolateThanks]

My DS (Y1) came from school today and told me'Mum,you forgot to pay for 'Beauty and the Beast' '.
The thing is,I didn't forget, it was bugging me for the last week. According to the letter from school, they organised trip for kids to watch spectacle as their current topic is fairy tales. It's in our local theatre and cost £10(it says 'voluntary contribution'),they're going just before Christmas.
I am inclined not to send him as we are financially struggling at the moment, and on the other hand I just feel that the whole outing is totally unnecessary at this time of the year.School knows full well that people in this area are not financially comfortable,yet they feel it's perfectly acceptable to remind the kid that their parent didn't cough up for trip.
Sorry for a rant.

I'm with OP. I am sick to the back teeth of the school constantly asking for money. The panto is particularly annoying as I am being told to pay £13 for a trip bloody miles away when the village hall has a massively subsidised panto for 50p THE SAME DAY.

It is not the school's job to decide that all kids need to go to the panto at Christmas. Parents can decide that for themselves and arrange their own family trip. There are loads of Christmas things the school can do without asking parents to fork out money they might struggle to afford, (especially at Christmas).

My school never took us to panto. Never felt like I missed out.

How sodding ungrateful. We do it because a lot of the children we teach don't ever get to experience things like that. Some children are very deprived, some have shit lives and suffer abuse, some are carers etc. It's not our idea of fun, believe me, but the children absolutely love trips and they can be very enriching experiences.

If you're sick of schools asking for money, that's appalling. Are you aware of what is happening in education at the moment? Do you know how much we spend from our own pockets to ensure that children have access to books, decent resources, basic stationery and sometimes even clothes and food??

Get a massive grip.

That's the thing, doorhandledog.
In my other children schools,we had a group meetings with teachers to discuss and plan things in advance. I think, this is the way it should work, as a mutual agreement.It's like secondary school trips abroad ,where they cost an arm and leg without consulting parents first.

Right. Do you know how much work teachers do and you want an extra meeting about maybe going to a Christmas panto?

A parents meeting to discuss a potential trip to a panto?! 😐

Good way to ensure that no schools ever do trips and that is when kids who don’t get chances otherwise really will miss out

Absolutely fucking ridiculous

It's a parent's responsibility to contact school regarding their child's trips.

The schools aren't psychic.

@NoChocolateThanks we have enough to do without extra meetings! I'm sorry but you're just being selfish and ridiculous. I'm hiding this thread now because you're too annoying.

So what's the issue? Is it that you can't afford it or is it that you object to the trip because it's near christmas/wasn't discussed with parents first/inconvenient for you personally?

The voluntary contribution is just that - voluntary. If you can't afford it, just return the permission slip. The school will not (indeed cannot) exclude your child from a trip during school hours. If not enough people pay the school won't organise trips, but that's not really your problem.

I think it's not good if the teacher pointed out a list of students who's parents haven't paid. However, it is easy to say "x, y, z, please remind your parents that you need the reply slips and money" and not realise that some kids/parents might feel that it is putting them under financial pressure. A quiet word that the teacher shouldn't talk about the money to primary aged kids wouldn't be unreasonable, but I don't blame you for not wanting to do it.

The school are doing a lovely thin organising a trip to the pants - something which otherwise some children would never experience. If you can’t afford it, it’s up to you to let them know that. I can’t understand the negative attitude towards teachers trying to do something nice for the kids?

I am also sick of the constant flow into my Children’s primary school from my purse. Chocolate, bottles of wine, sweetie jars items for the food bank as well as a harvest box and more chocolate and prizes for raffles and biying raffle
Tickets

Im also a secondary school teacher and yes the trips are WAY more expensive but not constant drip drip drip all bloody year long

Applogies for
Lack of punctuation it stopped working midpost no idea why

Cold day in hell before I discuss my finances with anybody but my bank manager. YANBU, op.

group meetings with the teachers

About running a trip to a pantomime? Give me strength.

Cold day in hell before I discuss my finances with anybody but my bank manager. YANBU, op.
Which is entirely your right.
But if you started complaining that the world wasn't psychic about your financial situation then you would unreasonable.

It's like people complaining they are hard up but then won't let school know they qualifiy for pupil premium so their child never gets any additional support, school don't have the money to offer financial support. Either say something, do something or don't complain.

Kids are expensive. It is a key part of parenting - educating them. The State pays for most of their education. Parents should pay for some things. Trips are one of those things. You are not asked for much - and there is always the option of going for free if you have to.

Most people who complain actually happily waste money on other things - for themselves.

But I am hypothetically being put in an uncomfortable position there maisy - either I pay £10 I can’t afford or I have to discuss my finances with teachers.

Devil and deep blue sea. Neither one of those things appeal, unsurprisingly.

mrs when my children were primary age we often had £20 a week for food.

£10 would have meant I didn’t eat. I’m not kidding.

immortalmarble
Kids having school trips is part of having kids. It's not some surprising factor that nobody saw coming. By the time kids get to school age there's 4 or 5 years to realise that there can be school trips.
This is what I don't understand. It's a bit 'parent gets irritated by fairly common school cost which is standard part of having children'.

Either pay the cost of the trip or speak to the school and they will support. It's not an impossible situation. It's up to the parent which one they choose.

This is the OP two weeks ago

**
05/11/2018 13:41 NoChocolateThanks

Family of 6(2 teenagers+2 under 5),2 dogs and cat.
Cooking from scratch, menu planning for whole week.Aiming to spend no more than £100,but some weeks up to£250.

I think you can afford a tenner

So when your children are as expensive as they will ever be when either you can’t work at all or shell out a big chunk on childcare you should be thinking about school trips?

A lot of people are just keeping their heads above water.

For my part, I wanted to send my children to school and have them well turned out and well equipped and well behaved and they were; I don’t want to have to get into my finances, it’s embarrassing, can teachers not understand this!?

Sorry bold didn’t work

05/11/2018 13:41 NoChocolateThanks

Family of 6(2 teenagers+2 under 5),2 dogs and cat.
Cooking from scratch, menu planning for whole week.Aiming to spend no more than £100,but some weeks up to£250.

Kids are expensive

They are but so many seem to think they shouldn't be or everyone else bar the actual parents should fund their choice to have them.

Schools have been running trips, mufti days etc for years. It's hardly unexpected unless you've been living on a desert island forever.

Yes, school trips were totally my top priority when pregnant