To think it's rude to say 'it was alright' when asked if you enjoyed a meal someone made?

[fairylightsandfire]

Looked after the baby all day, then came home put him to nap, went to the shop, for ingredients and made dinner for myself and DH.
When we'd finished I asked if he'd enjoyed it and he said 'it was alright' in a very non committal way. I asked what was wrong with it and he said nothing.

I planned this recipe and worked hard to make it. Is it unreasonable of me to think this is rude!?
He doesn't think it is

Totally fine from my husband.

A reasonable response would have been "I loved the way you'd cooked that but I am not sure I'd have it again, what did you think of it

Honestly, I so couldn't be arsed with that conversation with my husband on a nightly basis. Fuck I'd rather he said he hated it and left it rather than forcing me to have a protracted discussion on it, and giving me the patronising I loved the way you cooked that shite. Honestly that's too much pain for me.

Are we mentioning steamed badger on this thread or is that considered passé now? As in "bloody hell think himself lucky it wasn't badger and rice!" - that sort of thing?

Salty boiled bacon with cabbage? Sorry, I would have phoned for a takeaway. And Cameplaitpas the message is in the username, isn't it, in spite of your weasel words?

I say it’s alright to nearly everything.
I went on a 2 week holiday to Mexico come back and my work friends asked if I had a good time and I said yeh it was alright.

It’s not often I get really excited and the combo you made for tea would of probably got a thumbs down. I would of ate some of it and said it was alright which would of meant never cook it again.

It’s alright can mean I had an amazing time or it was shit.

Depends on your relationship.

OH and I both love to cook- constructive criticism is welcomed both ways- " that sauce needed more reduction", not enough chilli, too much thyme we try out new dishes on each other.
I welcome his comments, and hopefully him mine- it's a way of improving our cooking skills.

We don't take it personally.

It's one of our favourite dinners (Irish families on both sides), am surprised so many people haven't heard of it or think it would be tasteless it certainly isn't! Have had it in very posh hotels in Dublin as well (but prefer our own version).

I think he was rude. My dh and I would have said "thank you for cooking" as default, then if we really didn't like something we would apologetically explain that we weren't keen, with added appreciation for the effort of cooking. Not just "it was ok" and when asked what was wrong with it "nothing". Is he 14?

Thanks @DishingOutDone that's what I would probably have done if the tables had turned.

I suppose I was disappointed that he didn't like it as well as it's one of my favourites.

Everyone saying it sounds gross has to try it, it's honestly delicious!

Did it look like this?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3426442-To-ask-what-in-the-holy-hell-have-I-just-been-served

Sorry OP, but it sounds utterly revolting (to me!)

Maybe your DH wasn't impressed. 'It's all right' translates into 'don't want it again ta.'

Ask him to be honest. Just say 'I won't be offended, just tell me, do you not want that again, as you didn't seem right keen...'

I hate cabbage AND I hate gammon, so I defo wouldn't think it was delicious.. I really wouldn't

I dont expect my dh to thank me for each and every meal any more than I expect him to thank me for every load of laundry I do or each room I hoover. Nor do I thank him for going out to work each day. A general and mutual level of respect and appreciation is the standard. I'd also expect us to be able to be honest with each other about the food.

Well if he didn't like it he has to be honest, otherwise you might think it's a big hit and serve it regularly.
Early in our marriage I made something Hunters chicken I think it was. After clearing his plate Dh said, thank you for his dinner then hesitated looked a bit sheepish and asked if I could please not make that again. I didn't. I wasn't keen on it but thought he liked it.
Be honest with each other.

Rude or honest?

Polite to say thankyou though whether he liked it or not

Of course it's only polite to say thank you, that was lovely. Then he can cook if he's got better ideas.

I think it's best for him to be honest so you don't keep serving it to him.

Everyone saying it sounds gross has to try it, it's honestly delicious

See that's the thing op, everyone's tastes are different, so what's delicious to you isn't to someone else. For example I hate boiled potatoes, I'm no fan of cabbage and don't find boiled gammon particularly enticing. If the white gravy is indeed parsley sauce I would feel quite nauseous at rhe thought of it.

My Husband is like you with his chilli. He insists it's delicious. It's not. As in it's really not. You can't insist people like what you like. It's weird 🤣

I think it sounds lovely - just what I would like getting in from the cold.

Whenever I am asked if o have enjoyed a meal I almost always say it was lovely. However, I am honest if I really haven’t enjoyed something as it ends up on the repertoire and I have to be blunt later down the line.

My dh does almost all be cooking and it is fabulous. I am enormously grateful that I don’t need to think about it. However, what I find a bit of a bore is the endless discussion over how he made it, how he adjusted the recipe ever so slightly, how he has perfected it from last time etc etc etc. Sometimes I just want to stuff my face and move on. I would mainly survive from pasta and noodles though so I am not that much of a chef. I can and do cook but I cook to feed my family. Not much more.

Maybe he felt you were over egging it

Alright so Not the best ever and not the worst. Is he also Irish? I mean if I had that served up for me I’m not sure I would even try it. Parsley sauce and cabbage is enough so say no let alone boiled bacon. Sorry op it’s clearly not his kind of food.

But I agree - the cook ALWAYS gets a thank you

It’s alright can mean I had an amazing time or it was shit.
This ^^. If I'm doing happy noises then it means I love it and would like it again tomorrow. If I leave some then don't serve it again unless you knew I was saving room for pud. If I eat one mouthful (slowly) and then put my knife and fork down feel free to remove the plate, tip it in the bin and get a frozen pizza out.
Anything between and it could be okay and it could be wasn't smitten but it's better than going hungry. Generally speaking I don't do lots of excitement.

Did you cook the cabbage in the back water.... hmmmm miss it

Apparently I point my knife and fork towards my dinner repeatedly when I am really enjoying it

Everyone saying it sounds gross has to try it, it's honestly delicious.

@bluntness100

See that's the thing op, everyone's tastes are different, so what's delicious to you isn't to someone else.

I agree. Some food(s) DH likes, I can't stand. And some stuff I eat, makes him barf. We like some of the same stuff, but not everything, and I wouldn't be expecting him to eat something just because I like it. Nor would I expect him to be grateful.

Boiled bacon makes me wretch bleh!!!!

(Sorry OP!) As as been said, most boiled meat is gross.

(Again sorry!)

Your hubby should have been honest though, and said it tastes like sweaty feet with dock leaves. I'd much rather someone was honest tbh. It may be a bit offensive, but at least you know.