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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think mumsnet is full of hate crime?

999 replies

Whyisthisacceptable · 15/11/2018 18:55

The whole active thread list is always taken up by tons of trans bashing threads. How is it acceptable? Anything relating to anyone transgender is bashed. If this was against another minority of people, race, sexuality, religion it would be taken down and reported as hate crime. I don’t understand how the feminism board makes it acceptable?

OP posts:
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17
Perfectly1mperfect · 16/11/2018 13:55

I didn’t call India “he”. I don’t care about pronouns. I was highlighting the irony of defending the right of India to be called “she” when India spouts some pretty (in some people’s eyes) transphobic views.

I know it wasn't you that called India a 'he'. It was perverseconverse. However I think regardless of Indias views she should still be addressed as 'she'. Just because she may have, in some people's eyes, transphobic views, doesn't mean people should be transphobic to her. Two wrongs don't make a right as the saying goes.

PlantsArePeopleToo · 16/11/2018 13:57

When people convert to Islam and change their name, do you refuse to address them by their new name?

Nobody is calling India by their old name though.

Again this argument does not work.

ButchyRestingFace · 16/11/2018 14:00

How should Ian Huntley be referred to?

Is it terrible that I’ve just deadnamed them?

EarlyWalker · 16/11/2018 14:03

People who refer to India as 'he' don't do it because they don't like Indian's views, they do it because India is male.

Why do you think this is acceptable to say? India is a transwoman.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 16/11/2018 14:06

Let’s not bring Ian Huntley into this

I think we are all intelligent and savvy enough to know that he can’t be seen as a typical trans person

That’s what upsets me . Using his name as an example

Come on

ButchyRestingFace · 16/11/2018 14:06

Why do you think this is acceptable to say? India is a transwoman.

Presumably because a transwoman is a biological male and the PP doesn’t believe that it’s possible for a man to become a woman.

Perfectly1mperfect · 16/11/2018 14:07

How should Ian Huntley be referred to?

Well I can't speak for everyone, but my personal opinion is that when anyone commits such a horrendous crime, they should lose all human rights. Therefore I couldn't care less if Ian Huntley identified as a woman. I think the only thing suitable for him is the death penalty.

wrexhamtrans · 16/11/2018 14:09

"Let’s not bring Ian Huntley into this

I think we are all intelligent and savvy enough to know that he can’t be seen as a typical trans person

That’s what upsets me . Using his name as an example "

we've come full circle now to the previous issue...self identification!

anyone can claim to be transgender

DisrespectfulAdultFemale · 16/11/2018 14:09

When people convert to Islam and change their name, do you refuse to address them by their new name?

More whatabouttery. Classic diversionary tactic. Yawn.

Avegemitesandwich · 16/11/2018 14:09

Why do you think this is acceptable to say? India is a transwoman.

Transwomen are male by their very definition. If they weren't male, they wouldn't be transwomen, they would be women.

ButchyRestingFace · 16/11/2018 14:09

I think we are all intelligent and savvy enough to know that he can’t be seen as a typical trans person

That’s what upsets me . Using his name as an example

I never suggested for one second that he is a “typical transperson”.

Nevertheless IH now - according to the tabloid press - self identifies as a woman and wishes to be known as Nicola.

Does IH have the right to self identify as a woman, have their personal pronouns respected and be known as Nicola?

I’m actually inclined to say yes to the Nicola question.

VerbeenaBeeks · 16/11/2018 14:10

You might not care, but it is dismissive to keep on calling you that if you actually did.
Repeatedly being called cis, then - would you like that?
If not, you're using the same argument as those who insist on using cis knowing it offends.
As in them - "But you are cis"

You - "but you are a person, so you are they, not a she"

DisrespectfulAdultFemale · 16/11/2018 14:10

Let’s not bring Ian Huntley into this

Why not? If Huntley claims to be trans then we have every right to include Huntley in the conversation.

Weetabixandshreddies · 16/11/2018 14:11

I don't agree with self ID then you are as much "transphobic" as all those you are slating!*

And that is utter tosh and you know it. I am against the use of self ID, particularly on an ad hoc basis, because it is open to abuse. There have to be some regulations in place. I am not against any person however they may identify. And please dont @me. It's not allowed you know.

Avegemitesandwich · 16/11/2018 14:11

What about Karen White? Should I be referring to Karen as 'she'?

DisrespectfulAdultFemale · 16/11/2018 14:11

I think we are all intelligent and savvy enough to know that he can’t be seen as a typical trans person

Oh, so now we can speak only about "typical trans" people, eh?

Fuck that.

selepele · 16/11/2018 14:12

its not a hate crime but some posters can be rude about it, I dont think trans women are women but they are humans with feelings

DisrespectfulAdultFemale · 16/11/2018 14:12

Transwomen are male by their very definition. If they weren't male, they wouldn't be transwomen, they would be women

Precisely.

ButchyRestingFace · 16/11/2018 14:13

And please dont @me. It's not allowed you know.

What? Are we not allowed to tag people with @? Is this a new rule? (Genuine question).

VerbeenaBeeks · 16/11/2018 14:14

I am willing to bet that NO-ONE on this thread is saying they don't have a problem with self ID. Not one.
People DO have a problem with people having a problem with ALL transwomen though, which is what the thread is about in the first place.
AIBU to think MN is full of hate? Yes, that is in the boards. From some.

Weetabixandshreddies · 16/11/2018 14:14

By the way I reported perverseconverse post earlier which referred to a transwoman as "he".

Avegemitesandwich · 16/11/2018 14:15

Like another poster said, I wouldnt say to a fat person 'ha ha you are fat you fatty!'

However, neither would I say 'OMG hun you are so skinny'. Because that would fly right in the face of the reality of what I see before me.

ButchyRestingFace · 16/11/2018 14:16

By the way I reported perverseconverse post earlier which referred to a transwoman as "he".

Well, fingers on the buzzers because someone else just referred to Ian Huntley as “he”.

CaveMum · 16/11/2018 14:17

I’m sorry, thread diversion, did you say Ian Huntley now wants to be known as “Nicola”?! As in the same name as one of his murder victim’s mother?! That’s disgusting 🤬🤬🤬

VerbeenaBeeks · 16/11/2018 14:18

What point?Lol, nice try. The point I have made several times in the last couple of pages of this thread, directly to you. About the innate sense of being a woman being the definition of a woman. I'm. Trying. To. Engage. With. You

Sorry, just seen this.I have repeatedly on theses threads said what it means, to me, to be a woman. As in I feel it physically and mentally.
I'm sure @RatRolyPoly has repeatedly as well, and would agree there literally is no point hashing it out yet again for a "haha, gotcha" moment and a "but no, I said what is a woman?! Define WOMAN!" for it all to start up again.
You. May. Be.Trying. To.Engage.But. NoOne. Wants. To. Listen.
If.It's.Not.The.Right.Answer.