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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have just ‘taken a day’ today?

302 replies

BasinHaircut · 13/11/2018 16:35

I called in sick today. Not because I actually feel ill, but for reasons I can’t explain just felt like I needed a day off from life.

I have done some work so as not to have to play catch up tomorrow with emails and the like, but otherwise I’ve essentially pulled a sickie (and I feel guilty about it).

I have a husband and a 5yo son and so taking a ‘day off’ at the weekend isn’t an option IYSWIM. And I feel like there is so much to do day to day that sometimes it’s overwhelming.

Now I think about it I could have taken a day’s annual leave but this morning when I just didn’t want to engage in life I didn’t think of that, I thought a sick day was my only option.

Do I sound like I’m going bananas?

OP posts:
madvixen · 13/11/2018 16:40

Not at all. Mental health is just as important as physical health and somethings, especially if it all feels overwhelming, you need to take a day. I hope you feel a little better for it

Kelsoooo · 13/11/2018 16:41

Not remotely, I’ve been there. And trying to vocalise it was near impossible. When I returned to work the next day though, I understood.

Take care of your mental health, or your physical health will suffer.

Neverender · 13/11/2018 16:42

Nope - I'm lucky enough to be able to work from home so I have today.

lifecouldbeadream · 13/11/2018 16:45

I once worked for a firm who had ‘duvet’ days for just that reason. Marvellous idea.

ScrumpyBetty · 13/11/2018 16:45

No, you are not unreasonable. You are cleverly overwhelmed and struggling. Maybe you need to think about cutting down your hours at work ,or asking your DH if you could have a few hours at the weekend so you can have some time for yourself.

Fluffyears · 13/11/2018 16:47

I really think you should be able to call in sick with mental health. I can’t imagine calling in though andvsaying i’m Feeling mentally unwell and need a self dare day. Sometimes I feel the same OP, life can be relentless. I hope the day off helped.

Fluffyears · 13/11/2018 16:48

Also I have done the same and made up another illness to cover the fact that ‘I just can’t today...’

bringbackthestripes · 13/11/2018 16:49

What excuse did you give?
Just wondering as I never sound ill on days when I have (on the rare occasion) genuinely phoned in sick! Looking for tips Grin
I hope you feel better after a day away from it all.

PoptartPoptart · 13/11/2018 16:50

I don’t think yabu for doing this, however I can see how it could be abused by some, citing ‘mental health’ as a reason to have a day off.
Sadly such people ruin it for genuine people with genuine needs.

RangeRider · 13/11/2018 16:52

This is what unpaid leave and holiday is for... You're not mentally ill, you just need time to wind down. By claiming illness you're making it harder for people who genuinely need the time off with actual mental health issues. Angry

Megan2018 · 13/11/2018 16:54

I did this yesterday - but wasn't recorded as sick, it was TOIL I'd accrued.

I needed a day to just not "adult". I had a million and one jobs at home that needed doing but couldn't do any of them - instead I just had some silence and some alone time.

I am always with other people and sometimes I just need to shut myself away from the world.

I even got someone else to look after my horse as I just couldn't face driving or leaving the house. This is unheard of.

I feel much better today for it.

ilovesooty · 13/11/2018 16:56

This is what annual leave, TOIL and unpaid leave is for. I hope too many people weren't impacted by your not turning up.

TheMobileSiteMadeMeSignup · 13/11/2018 16:58

This is what unpaid leave and holiday is for... You're not mentally ill, you just need time to wind down. By claiming illness you're making it harder for people who genuinely need the time off with actual mental health issues.

I don't agree. If you phone in with flu, you don't have pneumonia but you are no less entitled to the sick time. If you are me tally struggling then you don't have a mental illness but why is it any less important to take that time to sort yourself? Not dealing with minor mental health issues can lead to full-blown illness so I think the OP was right to take a day.

TheMobileSiteMadeMeSignup · 13/11/2018 16:58

*mentally, not me tally

BirthdayCakes · 13/11/2018 17:01

I wonder if there's something in the air?

My DH who is usually the face of presenteeism took the afternoon off today and is planning on taking tomorrow off too.. He says he just wants to hang out, sleep, pick the DCs up from school, and potter around a bit..

SuperstarDJ · 13/11/2018 17:03

a day to recharge can sometimes make the world of difference. I wouldn’t let guilt ruin it.

RangeRider · 13/11/2018 17:03

If you phone in with flu, you don't have pneumonia
But you're still ill. If it's flu or if it's a really bad cold that lays you low so you genuinely can't go to work you're ill. That's not what OP is saying. She wasn't mentally incapable of getting out of bed or feeling so depressed that she couldn't stop crying, she just fancied a day off because she doesn't get time off at the weekend due to having a family! You can't not go to work because you feel like taking it easy. Or leastways you can but you'll be fired.

RangeRider · 13/11/2018 17:03

a day to recharge can sometimes make the world of difference
So take a day unpaid or as holiday!

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 13/11/2018 17:05

Maybe there’s something in the air. I feel sad and melancholy today - so very rare for me. I craved the comfort of my own home and the familiarity and love of my dogs.

I think you should have taken leave though OP, it’s not a reason for a sickie.

ReflectionsofParadise · 13/11/2018 17:05

To the guilters on this thread... get a grip. One day off. I bet you're the type that sends your kids in even if they're missing a limb. 🙄

ILoveAutum · 13/11/2018 17:06

Don’t waste any more time feeling guilty or you’ll waste the good it has done you to have a day off!

...I’d also hide the thread because there’ll be a pile in from people moaning at you. IGNORE

Satsumaeater · 13/11/2018 17:08

You can't take annual leave at short notice in some places, eg I have to give two weeks notice if I want a day off. So a day's sickie is the only option if you need some time at short notice.

In my case I can work from home - I don't need a break from the job necessarily but I hate having to be in the office for the sake of it and I do need a break from the commute at times (both mentally and financially).

ReflectionsofParadise · 13/11/2018 17:09

@rangerider "You can't not go to work because you feel like taking it easy." Well no actually, as an adult that is exactly what she can do. We're not slaves ffs.

If you were my manager your team would've ousted you within weeks. If someone needs a day off sick because they need a break then they still need a day off. I'd rather a staff member did that every now and then and perform better at work than come in everyday and drive themselves in to the ground until they were genuinely unwell.

Your attitude is shitty and you wouldn't go far in many companies these days.

Bloodybridget · 13/11/2018 17:09

The thing is, you'd usually have to book TOIL or unpaid leave in advance; if you just wake up one day and feel you really need a day off, all you can do is throw a sickie.

Bloodybridget · 13/11/2018 17:10

X post with Satsumaeater!

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