Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WIBU to refuse to remove my nose piercing?

198 replies

ManonBlackbeak · 09/11/2018 17:18

Just that really.

I work for an agency doing supply work in schools. Ive been doing this for about three years, and love it. I enjoy it and the flexiability it brings, that I can go on holiday in term time etc. I have regular schools that I go to and get excellent feedback, people ask for me and I'm pretty much always in work. Just for context, I think I'm good at my job.

The whole time Ive been with the agency I've had a small nose stud and no one has ever commented on it. In fact I forget it's there most of the time.

To get to the point I was asked yesterday about going for a potentially long term position at a school Ive never been to before, one of the few Ive never been to in the area. They asked to meet me first and I agreed, which in itself is unusual as usually you just turn up as and when you are needed. They liked me a lot apparently, and would like me take the placement but on the condition that I remove my nose ring. Now I was a bit taken a back at this, and so was my consultant actually. It's never happened before anywhere in three years! It's a tiny stud you can barely see! A ring I'd have understood. An eyebrow or lip ring certainly, but nose stud? Christ, Ive seen loads of teachers and TAs with them!

I'm not even alternative. Ive no visible tattoos, and dress fairly mundanely but this seemed horribly judgey to me. I don't know why? I feel like they've judged me on how I chose to dress and look I suppose.

WIBU to refuse to take it out?

OP posts:
OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow · 09/11/2018 18:25

You'd be asked at our school. It's about looking professional.

loverly · 09/11/2018 18:26

I would agree that it doesn't really reflect anything except someone at the top's attitude.

I agree with not wearing one if it is consistent with the policy. The policy tells you about the head. If you don't like it don't work there.

Can I point out the teachers are adults and are old enough to make personal choices. Teenagers are not. So I think the 'if kids can't, adults can't either' view is ridiculous.

Elphame · 09/11/2018 18:39

I'm now thinking I'll stay as an accountant, where my piercings seem to be perfectly acceptable

This made me smile - I worked for a very conservative accountancy /financial planning firm in a client facing role. I interviewed with my nose stud in place and was offered the job on the spot. It was never mentioned.

kaitlinktm · 09/11/2018 18:42

And if students are not allowed nose studs then teachers shouldn't wear them either

Why not?

At my last school pupils weren't allowed to wear makeup - they tried this one on me. We aren't there on equal terms and this is my place of work. Are they telling me that I am not allowed to wear makeup, as an adult woman, during the working week until I retire in my 60s?

Professional clothing is one thing - but really why should I be expected to wear exactly the same stuff as a twelve year old when I was in my 50s?

Racecardriver · 09/11/2018 19:08

@thedarkpassenger it is unprofessional. I have never seen a professional with a facial piercing in. The only professional I know with one at all is my friend who was my high school English teacher but she takes it outfit work. I have never seen another teacher with a nose piercing. I have never seen a doctor, dentist, lawyer or, accountant with one. In the same way that o have never seen any of the above wearing leggings at work. It’s a largely accepted norm that facial piercings are casual attire.

TheDarkPassenger · 09/11/2018 19:14

I can count 4 teachers that that have facial peircings at my children’s school and one wears short sleeved shirts and has tattoos on show. I’m glad of it tbh, I’m glad our head recognises individuality and I’m glad my children are around it, although they are with me anyway I suppose.
I work with a few others with facial peircings and none of us have ever had a problem. The lady I work closely with is also heavily tattooed and has no issues, she’s been doing this job 15 years.

Must be just different parts of the country I suppose!

JacquesHammer · 09/11/2018 19:14

I have never seen a doctor, dentist, lawyer or, accountant with one

I was one of those. I have a nose piercing.

It was a rather stuffy, traditional firm and yet they judged professionalism on one’s ability to do one’s job.

I now run my own company and have never had an issue with visible piercings/tattoos.

My DD has just moved to secondary and there’s at least one member of staff with a nose piercing. There were several teachers at her prep with tattoos/piercings.

mirialis · 09/11/2018 19:22

Echo everyone else who says, if you want the job, take it out and if you don't, don't. I think they look tacky but have employed great people with them and with visible tattoos that I also think look really tacky. I am about to recruit for a new set up, however, and will not be taking on people with these features as they absolutely would not be appreciated by the clientele and without the appreciation of the clientele, there is no work.

Biancadelriosback · 09/11/2018 20:37

I've worked in a range of sectors including hospitality (trendy bars I could keep it in, 4* hotels I couldn't), admin assistant, yes. Set builder, yes. Construction site, no. Consultant, no. Banker, yes. Sales, yes and no (different places) and now I'm a senior manager, yes. It all varies.

theworldistoosmall · 09/11/2018 20:49

I wouldn't take it out.
One of my dd's stop-gap jobs had a no facial piercing policy. They interviewed her and offered her a job with visible piercings. She used to just push the ring up when she remembered.
Days she didn't remember, it didn't stop her from doing her job and she was still the best sales person on the team.

Now office manager and still has visible piercings - bridge, nose, septum, eyebrow, and snake bites,

PeaceRiot · 09/11/2018 21:09

I think it rings alarm bells. That’s quite a backwards attitude so I’d worry about what the work environment would be like. If you really needed/wanted the work then obviously you’d need to weight that up against your piercing.

I think it’s ridiculous to call it ‘unprofessional’. It has no bearing at all on your ability to do your job and look smart and presentable. I know many intelligent, successful professionals with piercings although from racecardriver’s list of acceptable professions, just one dentist with a small nose stud.

stevie69 · 10/11/2018 09:00

I'm now thinking I'll stay as an accountant, where my piercings seem to be perfectly acceptable

This made me smile - I worked for a very conservative accountancy /financial planning firm in a client facing role. I interviewed with my nose stud in place and was offered the job on the spot. It was never mentioned.

@Elphame It's funny, isn't it? I mean accountancy is often perceived as being ultra conservative. And boring Blush But I love my work; it's interesting and varied and my slightly offbeat appearance doesn't seem to matter at all.

But I just got the urge to pass on my knowledge to the next generation. I expected the teaching profession to be much more free and liberal but clearly that's not always the case.

I'm going to a Train to Teach event next week so I'll get a better idea then Smile

stevie69 · 10/11/2018 09:04

I have never seen a doctor, dentist, lawyer or, accountant with one

I'm an accountant. I have both a nose and Medusa stud. And 'interesting' hair Blush

oblada · 10/11/2018 09:17

Im a lawyer with a nose piercing and quite a few of my colleagues have this and more (one of the top women there has a nose piercing and a tongue piercing). In this day and age it's ridiculous to just have such a blanket view on piercing.
Also - as mentioned before - would you also consider it unprofessional on Indian women, who have it for cultural reasons?

Original poster
ManonBlackbeak · 10/11/2018 09:23

PeaceRiot That's just it. I'm wondering what else they will find to pick on if I remove it? For example it's Christmas soon, and I always get my nails gel painted. Will they have an issue with that? What about hairstyles? Clothes etc. It's incrediably stuffy, judgemental and old fashioned. Though thinking about now all of the staff were dressed in sort of smart business dress, which is incrediably unusual for a Primary school!

I suppose they could say it was a health and safety risk, but. I also had two rings, on my fingers, two ear studs in each ear and a watch on. All of which could be classed as health and safety risks but funnily none of those were mentioned.....

Without meaning to drip feed the agency have had trouble filling this vacancy. I think I now know why.

OP posts:
CBA2RTFT · 10/11/2018 09:33

I have never seen a doctor, dentist, lawyer or, accountant with one

I had cause to visit hospital several times a couple of years ago. I saw loads of piercings, including on the younger doctors.

KittyLane1 · 10/11/2018 09:36

I'm an FE tutor, award winning actually, I have a facial piercing, 10 visible tattoos and unnatutal hair colour.

My work place is very image conscious and yet no one has ever said anything to me except well done for your results and stats

JacquesHammer · 10/11/2018 09:38

I'm an FE tutor, award winning actually, I have a facial piercing, 10 visible tattoos and unnatutal hair colour

Careful. I said I now run an award winning business on a similar thread about tattoos/piercings and one of the usual suspects suggested “there’s awards, then there are awards”.

She’s had a name change, she’ll be here Grin

stevie69 · 10/11/2018 09:44

And if students are not allowed nose studs then teachers shouldn't wear them either

Well that's just cock custard! One rule for pupils and another for teachers? Well, yes actually. Welcome to the world Blush

stevie69 · 10/11/2018 09:46

I'll run in the corridor too if I like Grin

MemoryOfSleep · 10/11/2018 09:49

I've seen primary kids wearing nose studs, admittedly for cultural reasons rather than to stick it to the man. If the aforementioned school has issues with discipline, the first thing lots of incoming heads or academy chains will do is introduce a strict dress code for staff and students. I imagine they've had trouble filling the post because of the school's reputation rather than because of their stance on nose rings.

Starlight345 · 10/11/2018 09:49

Can you do some digging about the school?

I would have no issue with you teaching my Ds with a nose piercing, or pink hair or tattoos. Tbh anything that attracts his attention to the teacher is a bonus.

However there school and there rules so yes if you want the job then you have to follow them.

I doubt it would close up not worn during the day as it has been years . I can go weeks without wearing earrings

Ginseng1 · 10/11/2018 09:56

If it's just a supply placement just say no & move on as you say even if you took it out what else would they pick on. I think it's good for kids to see a bit of diversity. One of my kids teachers used to dye her hair a different mad colour every few weeks the kids loved that side of her personality as well as being a great teacher!

museumum · 10/11/2018 09:57

Business attire for primary teachers is just daft. I wouldn’t want to work there.