To ask about the weird things you only learned from MN?

[Blanchedupetitpois]

It seems like in MN world there are all kinds of rules that I swear I’ve never seen expressed or followed in real life. What have you been most surprised by? I’ll start:

1. Adults don’t celebrate birthdays, and if you expect any recognition of yours, you’re being childish.

1. Halloween is exclusively an American import with no history in this country, and celebrating it is therefore tacky and meaningless.

1. Trick or treating is glorified begging.

1. Absolutely nobody other than you or your DP is remotely interested in your pregnancy, and even telling another person that you’re pregnant is akin to riding a donkey down the high street while calling for palm fronds to be laid at your feet in recognition of the impending miracle of your unborn child.

@GunpowderGelatine the worst bitchfest I've seen on MN was because of Zoflora! I was called a vile bully and that I was disgusting and all sorts because I pointed out that people don't need 30 bottles of zoflora in the cupboard 

That any kind of minor argument with your husband will que many responses saying he is controlling, abusive, leave him!

I work in a major supermarket and in 5 years have never actually seen anybody buy zoflora

@Devillanelle 🤣🤣🤣 hilarious!
People get very upset on here when others don't Zoflora the life out of their skirting boards. I take a baby wipe to mine when I can be arsed.

Another I've just thought of:
Having, and actually using, a tumble dryer is the height of extravagance. Unless there's a tornado outside, you must always line dry your clothes, even if they're out there for 5 days and have turned into blocks of ice, there's no excuse for using the tumble dryer you spent £600 on, it will create a mile long hole in the ozone layer and cost you eleventy-billion pounds in electric

That someone committing benefit fraud is absolutely fine, nobody else's business, and you are a horrible, bitter interfering person if you even consider reporting it. But if a shop or restaurant undercharges you by a quid and you do not rush back to repay it, you are a vile thief conning society

I bought Zoflora once, thanks to MN, spent a fiver on it, full of hope of lovely smelling radiators and washing.

Honestly considering the stuff burns off the skin on your nose when you sniff in the bottle, I couldn't tell the difference at all with anything

Log EVERYTHING with 101.

Frankly I’m stunned on here when people really like their MILs and they act like a normal person

One of the things I've learnt from mumsnet is that some people are very very sensitive. The tiniest most minor interaction with other people can be perceived as a slight, and someone merely politely disagreeing with them is evidence of bullying.

I've only met one person like this in real life. Thankfully.

I love MN
I’ve literally been LOL at these posts!

Thank you for being the most exciting part of my day

Any ideas what these “outing” hobbies are? I always imagine it’s just 5 a side football.

It’s cycling in my head SelinaMyers. Though 5 a side could be a possibility.

DH has hobbies - they are massively bizarre unusual they would be very identifying.

Selina or 9-hole golf. But I like to think it's something more exotic and weird, link skunk-hunting or those knight role play games!

Any ideas what these “outing” hobbies are? I always imagine it’s just 5 a side football.

I try to imagine what could be so outing. Historical re-enactment maybe? Perhaps a very specific historical period. English Civil War or something.

Or maybe the partners do something like trainspotting and the poster just can't face all the inevitable jokes about anoraks and slacks, so she pretends it's something mysterious?

Is it five a side football on bikes with 9 holes as goals Catspyjamazzzz?

Definatley no bikes, it’s the mid life crisis he missed.

YY @MrsFezziwig especially when it comes to child rearing. It makes me seeth when someone comes along with a whole three weeks experience of being a parent to piss and moan about the advice their MIL has given them, not thinking that MIL has more experience in her little toe of raising children than OP does in her whole body and she didn't just plop into this earth purely for the purpose of being snarked at by Princess Precious and the First Baby Ever to Be Born. Same goes for posters who vent their disgust because an old lady said hello to their baby.

I would love a very unusual hobby. All those times when you have to take part in a cringey 'getting to know each other' exercise. When they say 'tell everyone about something that you enjoy' I'd love to be able to say 'At weekends I tour the UK dressed as a medieval troubadour, playing 13th century music and reciting poetry'. So much better than 'I'm training for a triathlon'.

That every relationship has to be perfect in every area or you should LTB 

That it is damn rude to invite people for dinner and expect them to byob

That everyone keeps their house and under furniture spotless

Oh and my favorite..

It's a crime to question how to speak about your partner/husband about anything

Didn't you know he's your husband you should know how to structure every single question/ or thought to this separate human being 

That if you ask people for money as a wedding present it's about as rude as going into their house in the middle of the night and having a poo on their sofa. Even though the guests will be getting gifts bought with money (presumably not stolen or bought with nectar points) and all you'd be doing is not getting the gift but popping the money in a card - it's RUDE and you should go NC.

If you buy Boots 3 for 2 at Christmas, or any type of multibuy deal, even if it's nice Cath Kidsron stuff, you may as well give them a paper bag with dust in it because that's being a tight arse

Yes, hobbies. Everyone has hobbies.

I learned that all of mn really gets upset that I don’t have a bin in my bathroom. My bathroom is so small there isn’t space, I use reusable sanitary products and don’t use cotton wool or cotton buds, I don’t remember the last time a woman of menstruating age was in my house long enough to need to change her tampon.
This makes me sad, friendless and evil.

Also,
Can’t have children? Have you thought of adopting head tilt