To think £10 is mean for a 16th birthday?

[Plessis]

I know I am going to get flamed particularly as I can't give much back story, but I am feeling really cross that my parents sent my dd a tenner for her 16th birthday. It was such a rubbish, thoughtless present. They have my dsis and my dbro living with them (they are in their 40s) and charge them no rent and are constantly paying for car repairs etc. This has been going on for a few years now and I've had enough. The ten pound note was the icing on the cake.

If they were really scraping the barrel I would be more sympathetic but they own their house outright, probably don't have much spare cash but seem to have enough to support my dbro who has never left home (had drug problems in the past but has been clean and working for many years now) and my dsis whose had a rough time and got kicked out if her house with her dd.

I feel as though I and my family are an afterthought. Ten quid just seems so mean for a 16th,particularly as my pils bought her something really thoughtful and lovely

I think it's tight and shows they don't give a shit. They only have 2 grand children and that's all they can be assed to do and sometimes do nothing if in a mood? My grandad has over 15 grand children and we all get £100 between Christmas and birthday each. He's not an overly wealthy man either. They just sound spiteful.

Not bothering with an actual present is fine, it's difficult to buy for teenagers. My grandad wouldn't have a clue what we would all individually want. But they just sound cruel. Ignoring her on her birthday before, not asking about her, not visiting etc. Stop bothering they don't care.

You know what to do for their next birthdays...a fiver in a card, on the premise that ten was because it was a special birthday.

It a gift... It's not a right... They have no real relationship with her unlike her other grandparents... So why are you surprised.. At least they thought of her... My children's dgp from their fathers side are minted, seriously minted, and they never get a thing for birthdays or Christmas... The other gc get cars, money etc... Mine, nothing

You have to teach them that it doesn't actually mean anything, that the takeaway, movie and cake that my parents do for them actually means more. And for that you might need to reign in your own expectations as well.

I don't agree beentheredone

I think a present from your grandparents is an absolute given on your birthday, particularly while you are young.

I think not giving a present to a grandchild would be a very definite statement indeed.

I think dd absolutely should expect a present from her GPS.

This year she got one, just a boring, tight one!

Mine and DH parents ask what she'd might like - believe me they have lists and drop hints every 5 minutes leading up to the day!

PMSL at people who put DNiece. Just put niece! It's like people who put DUncle or Ddog or DCat.

WTAF?! Just putting niece, uncle, dog, or cat is quicker!!! Batshit!

Surely its up to your dd to call her GM to say thanks ,not you. The present was for her.

I would be delighted with a tenner for my birthday, any birthday.

It's crap when your parents don't make an egg ort with your children. I have to say I didn't know 16 was a milestone birthday so it's possible they didn't. But that's not what this is really all about. It's the fact she's almost at adulthood and they haven't bothered. I have the same problem with my father and DHs family. In fact, my children have never had a present or card from DHs family. They're not interested, their loss.

That was meant to be effort

Rise tall and get your dd to send a quick note to the effect of 'many thanks for the birthday tenner, hope you're well, much love...' etc. The 'relationship' such as it is, will be sustained, and you have not been compromised by having a family hissy fit. Yeah, situation not great, but c'est la vie.

My Dh's parents get him 10 $1 scratchie cards each year for his birthday 😂 he always says just a card would be nice instead of wasting money on scratch its we only got $2 this year!

My in-laws did practically the same. Bit of cash from one and a cheque for £20. No thought at all went into it!

My family messaged me for ideas and then put money into my bank account to buy her something from them based on a conversation about what she'd like. Much nicer.

Pasta teens love money. My teens would have hated their gran to put thought into it as what she thought was suitable would worry them. Cash all the way and she was the best gm in the world. They would go straight onto their phones to call her and l would hear them saying how grateful they were. For goodness sake kids need to be more grateful..or their dms.