AIBU to ask you how to deal with idiot teachers?

[DaysDragonBy]

Fuming right now. Had all sorts of shit from the school, but this takes the biscuit. DS has broken his wrist. It is in a cast and in a sling. He is under instructions from the doctor not to hold anything in his affected hand for three weeks. He is not to take the sling off at school.

His teacher knows this. His TA knows this. He has SN - ADHD and ASD.

He had art today. The art teacher told him to hold something in his hand. He said he couldn't. She took his fucking sling off and made him hold it in his hand with the broken wrist whilst he did something to it with the other hand.

I am absolutely furious, he said he told her he wasn't allowed to and she told him he has to anyway. Half way through the class his TA came in and took it off him thank god. But why the fuck do teachers think they know better than the injured child? I've told him, if anyone ever says that to him again whilst he has his cast on, he is to refuse, be as rude and he wants and tell them to call me.

In the interests of honesty, there is a bit of conflict with the school over this teacher at the moment.
It is the same teacher who has a tendency to waffle when giving instructions and complains when DS can't follow. When I requested that she made a bullet point summary at the end of her instructions I was told it is not fair to expect teachers to change their teaching style because one child in the class has SN.

That's appalling, if she has made a mistake then surely she should be able to stand up and admit it to the HT and then they can put in place some measures to avoid it happening again as well as discussing a plan to ensure that your DS understands her instructions.

Arse covering to the nth degree. Talk to the HT. She does not get to tell you what you can and cannot discuss.

And also it would destroy the trust between us !

I think the trust was kind of destroyed when she took a sling off a child's broken arm and made him hold something, the daft bint.

I do completely support you, btw. I wasn't asking because I didn't believe you, just that I am confused about which teacher said what.

We've suffered from our share of idiotic teachers too. And don't let me get started on the utterly disgraceful way dd was treated by her 6th form college... (She aced her A levels anyway, and will be going to one of the best Unis in the country despite her tutor.).

Oh absolutely go to the Head after that! And tell the Head she told you not to take it any further. I agree with pp, sounds like she is already on thin ice and panicking

Also re "idiot teachers" - that isn't saying all teachers are idiots at all. OP's question was just how do you deal with the ones who are idiots, which is some of them.

I would add the fact that the teacher has asked you to tell the school you were mistaken to the complaint tbh, OP.

Read the post from the OP a few above yours Itsnotabingthingisit

If it happened as your child said then yes that was an idiotic thing to do. I would calmly ask the teacher fir their version of events first.

As for bullet pointing instructions, that's a reasonable request when there is a child that needs this. If your DS has a 1:1 then they could do that.

I once had a similar situation where a mad PE teacher ignored my note saying we had medical advice that DD must not do any running or jumping due to a broken bone in her foot. I sent in another note, copied to the head, saying that due to her actions the injury had been exacerbated and we were now advised that DD would now be unable to do PE for several weeks. Head was so terrified of being sued that we had no further problems.

At my school we have strict instructions about contacting parents. It should always be done through the school and with HT's permission or knowledge. Sounds fishy to me that she called from her own mobile.

Exactly. Why did she not call from the staff room?

Definitely go further with this. She was going to lie to you. She is probably still bullshitting. Then to talk about your son like that. She is an arsehole.

Gosh. I wonder, too.... DaysDragonBy

@Volant

That's the sort of thing that used to happen when I was a child in the 70s and 80s. My DSis broke and dislocated her coccyx at the age of 12 and was obviously signed off from PE. But the PE teacher somehow thought it was a good idea to make her watch the games and be the ball girl. 

It didn't last long, thankfully, as she ended up being off school for 16 months.

It's depressing to think it still goes on.

Can't think of any reason myself. Oh, hang on a minute....

She doesn't sound at all professional OP. She also sounds like she dislikes your child a lot. Please take this further

It seems this is the latest in a range of complaints - you need a meeting with the senco and ta in a calm constructive manner.

If there's a medical reason why he can't hold something with broken arm then a drs note should have been sent to school - my dd was told to use her arm whilst it was in a cast, so instructions do vary depending on type of break.

As to the changes to instructions, I was always in two minds, my daughter has asd so adaptive information helps her BUT in the real world she needs to be able to cope with standard everyday situation including work so I took the hands off approach and didn't put in specific measures apart from exams. She's at university now and has a 30 minute session a week with her accessibility advisor and similar exam modifications to a levels but otherwise she is treated the same. It's a spectrum so each person is different but we found she has learned to cope with everything, but it takes longer.

You sound like one of "those" parents to be honest! You're anger and calling all teachers idiots makes you look an idiot to be honest.

I lost sympathy when I read that title.

If things are that bad home school or change schools.

Hi

Lizzie it isn't helped by the 'mustn't question the teacher/authority' attitude some have tbh.

Have you read the thread Son? Cause your lack of comprehension is quite baffling.

You're anger and calling all teachers idiots makes you look an idiot to be honest.

I have never called all teachers idiots.

Surely the teacher is by implication, questioning the judgement of the medical staff by her actions? Presumably that means she shouldn't use a doctor or hospital if she needs assistance, by the 'logic' displayed here?

Why do some teachers insist on speaking disparagingly about 'those' parents? It often seems to me to be a way of discouraging parents from fighting their DCs' corner, which is what we as parents should be doing?

No one is saying that it's right to be disrespectful in our communications with the school, but we also shouldn't lie down and allow our DC to miss out on a good education.

I'm speaking as an adoptive mum of 2 DDs. My DD1 (9) has SN, and we have had to really fight to get her the support she needs.

So I asked if seriously in those 2.5 years she has never asked him if he understands what he has to do. "No, I don't think so. I can't remember."

OP, once this has been resolved, if you know your child struggles to process instructions in the classroom, I would make an appointment with the Senco and get them to put a specific support target pertaining to this need in his support arrangements plan.

I am a TA and school governor. I would be very concerned by the phone call. It definitely sounds as though the teacher is trying to cover their back. I would also regard the comments about a complaint causing trouble between you and the school, as a threat. I would definitely take this further and would insist that further communication is in writing AND that any meeting between you and headteacher is properly minuted. Calling you in that manner is, imo, unprofessional. IME, that phone call, along with the other issues in the lesson today, as well as the historic problems, would be enough to even disciplinary proceedings.