to think being certified off work sick doesn't mean you can't leave the house

[Swansandducks]

A colleague has been out of work on a cert for the past two weeks. Someone saw her yesterday apparently collecting her niece from a ballet class and is now going around saying our colleague is 'throwing a sickie'.

AIBU to find this annoying? The woman in question has had a very bad chest infection and is due back in work on Monday. Surely it is normal that on the last few days of her illness she is capable of going out and about for an hour or two a day, which is very different to facing a long commute and a full day at work?

As others have said, doctors recommend holidays for stress. Quite possibly a doctor will also have recommended gradual stepping-up for recovery from a bad chest infection. I know when I had been off school with pneumonia, the first day I just literally went in and said hello to everybody and then went home. This wasn't my idea: I was told to do it by the doctor who thought springing straight back into full activity after being bedbound would be risky, and waiting
in bed until I felt ready for a full day would slow down my recovery.

One thing that made my dd's joint condition so bad was her fear of using her joints and work up gradually after an episode- because she was scared of school seizing on it to make her do too much activity and trigger another collapse. She needed to get away from the people who were constantly questioning her and suspecting her before she could start managing her condition as well as possible.

I worked 13 hours yesterday, most of them unpaid, some of them to cover for a colleague who has been signed off with stress. That is bad management on the part of the people who allocate funds at my institution. But I bloody well hope he is doing whatever he needs to do to feel better and recover easily.

as mentioned already the anger is directed at the wrong People !! Direct it towards management if staff are able to take weeks off work and 1) get full pay and 2) not face disciplinary action.

I had eye surgery last year that initially failed and I needed three more ops to sort it. I was signed off for 6 months. I was able to potter at home and get out and about for short trips if I had someone to drive me/accompany me, but I couldn't see well enough to use my computer at work (I'm still struggling with text tbh, and waiting to see if more surgery is an option).

I would have been fit to do a job I could get to on public transport and that didn't need a computer or to read text, but my place of work doesn't have roles like that. When I went back on a phased return it was purely to prevent eye strain, as I'd barely used a screen in 6 months.

If I couldn't have gone out in that time i'd have gone mad!

There's a big difference between short trips out to regain strength and doing a full day. YABVU.

I am trying to get my head round the posters who seem to think you cure stress by staying indoors and staring at your four walls, and a back ache by staying in bed. Really trying to get my head round it but am slightly worried about the risk of dislocating my neck at this point and having to take time off work.

Of course you can
I had 8 weeks off after spinal surgery and was out and about. But I couldn't sit for longer than 45 minutes so couldn't work

Wouldn't the world be a lovely place if everyone minded their own business?

If a holiday to Tenerife is the antidote to stress why wouldnt you use annual leave to cover it? Ime cure for stress is dealing with the underlying causes, holidays are more of a sticking plaster.

Totally get it @corythatwas DS had flu in January and was off school for 2 weeks. The first 10 days he didn't get out of bed (for an otherwise healthy 10 year old this was unheard of). I kept the school updated and the day I said he'd managed to get up they started saying I should bring him in for a few hours!!! I'd had to bath him as he was still too weak to do it himself, then he needed to lay on the sofa to recover from that, how they thought he could go in and sit at a desk I don't know!

I told them I had ignored and "pushed through" post viral fatigue as a youngster and ended up with CFS for over 25 years, he would be in as soon as I felt he was able to manage the two hours they suggested. He became much better on the friday afternoon, so by Monday he was able to go back. School was pissed off, but I knew they'd push him to "stay just a bit longer" if I had listened to them, and they did just that, so DS felt pressured to stay all day, even though I'd said I'd collect him early if he needed. I hate how no one seems to be allowed to be legitimately sick any more!

Of course the holiday is not an immediate antidote . They won't be on holiday the whole time they are signed off will they. It's probabky all part of a multi pronged approach to try and get better

My colleague is off sick with stress and has gone to Tenerife. It makes me so angry as I am covering all her work while she is being paid to take a holiday. Yes, it will make her less stressed but it's not the point

It is exactly the point!! What is the use of being signed off for stress if you do nothing to destress and just sit at home.

I was signed off with depression not long ago and getting away, going for day trips with my partner, not having to think about work, trying new fun things etc... was the only thing that stopped me contemplating ending my life.

Sorry you are having to pick up for your colleague but not having sufficient procedures in place to deal with these sorts of situations is a management issue not your colleagues.

BarbarianMum

I have to agree with the above. If the time off is stress related and that is down to your job then you need to change jobs, not be constantly signed off sick.

Staffing issues aren't always easy to fix. It depends on the size of a company and the fact that you never know how long someone with "stress" will have off.

@corythatwas (sorry to keep tagging you!) Look up the Sick Role theory. It explains so much why people think you must "get better" at all costs and chronic or mental illnesses/conditions are given short shrift.

@Mangoo surely if your colleague had taken it as annual leave and not sick leave they'd still be getting paid to be on holiday and you'd still be covering for them, so how does the holiday actually have any impact on you? Granted, long term sick cover is more gruelling, but that's your management's fault for not arranging cover or support for you.

If you're struggling that much then you're entitled to be off sick with stress too. Don't direct your ire at the wrong person.

It’s very naive to think that colleagues covering work for an absent colleague should blame management. It’s a privilege being allowed sick leave and we should not abuse this. We don’t have an automatic moral right to all the time off we need for being unwell. Stress is not always the fault of others. Sometimes we are in the wrong job or wrong environment and cannot hack it - we should leave or resign rather than take months of stress leave. And there is such a thing as the ‘sick role’ too - when we are off work and others cover for us we have a duty to get well as soon as possible to be back as soon as possible and be seen not to be ‘enjoying’ our time off. People posting pictures of activities they are enjoying when they are supposedly off sick is morally wrong. And the fact that people are not automatically appalled is testament to how far in the wrong direction we have gone

A doctor's certificate states that someone is unfit for work, not for everything else in their life.

Anyone who sees someone out doing an errand for a tiny snapshot of a day and extrapolates that they would be okay for work must be a right slacker in their own job. I am physically and mentally tired at the end of every normal working day, because I put a lot into my job when I'm here. I could not do my job with a debilitating illness on top. I could, while in the recovery period of that illness, run a couple of errands or give someone a lift somewhere or meet a friend for coffee. That's because none of those things are as physically or mentally tiring as doing my job, and because by still being on the sick I'd have the time I needed to recover from each one afterwards.

As for the attitude towards mental ill health...well, it just proves we have a long way to go before the stigma and judgement surrounding it is replaced with knowledge, understanding and compassion. Shame on those of you who can't - or won't - get it.

going out for a couple of hours is very different from doing an 8 hour shift at work even if it is desk based. On the rare occasion I’m off sick I’ve felt OK in the afternoon and have popped to the shops only to find that I’m really not well after all. It’s easy to feel well enough to do light tasks but not to be up for something a bit more challenging.

Meant to add - and a work day also involves having to get up when the alarm dictates, not when your body does, and having to have a shower and make yourself presentable, and in my case a one hour public transport commute both ways, all of which would be enough to flatten me by itself without the 8 hours at work, if I was only feeling 75% well.

When I was signed off with workplace stress my GP told me to get out and do things that made me feel happy when all I really wanted to do was hide under the duvet and never leave the house. It was part of my 'cure'.

After my hysterectomy part of my physio was walking a little further each day. Should I have walked up and down the kitchen?

Sorry @Magoo tagged the wrong poster!!!

As for the attitude towards mental ill health...well, it just proves we have a long way to go before the stigma and judgement surrounding it is replaced with knowledge, understanding and compassion. Shame on those of you who can't - or won't - get it.

I get it, I really do. But some mental illnesses are situational. Being in a job you hate or being in a crappy relationship for example and until the root of the problem is sorted out the problem will never get better.

It's not always fair to put extra pressure and responsibility on other people because you can't or won't take ownership ofyour own life.

TittyFahLaEtcetera I was quoting another previous poster!! I agree with you

When I first started work in the early 80s if you were ill you were expected to stay off until fully recovered and not stagger in as soon as you felt able to stand.

These days people are forced to work in such small teams that as soon as one person goes off sick or develops a long term health problem everything falls apart.

If the time off is stress related and that is down to your job then you need to change jobs, not be constantly signed off sick.

And many of us do exactly that - once we're well enough to regain some perspective and make rational decisions, the very things that severe stress can make impossible.

I was off sick with work-related stress and depression for four months. Did I want to be? Fuck, no. It was one of the worst periods of my life. But it was what I needed, in the opinion of the medical professional whose advice I sought (i.e. my GP). Nine months later, when I was in a much better place and no longer suffering from disordered thinking, I did indeed leave and found another job. But when I was at my worst, I literally couldn't decide whether to wear a green top or a blue one. The thought processes required to weigh up my work situation, finances, the job market etc etc would have been, quite literally, impossible. I knew work was the cause of my illness, but I had to get well again before I could make the changes I needed to ensure it didn't happen again.

TitOfTheIceberg I was talking about this the other day re mental health! I find it shocking that with all the publicity towards recognising mental health at the moment, some workplaces are still more than happy to allow their staff to be signed off with stress due to workloads (for example) or to hound them for a return date like another previous poster experienced. Or like on this thread, colleagues saying people should just book annual leave if their stressed or they can't leave their house etc...

It just proves why the campaign is so important as people still do not recognise how much mental health can affect someone.

Booking a holiday with your annual leave every year will not stop someone's mental health deteriorating.

And if it is work that's the problem of course you could just look for another job but why should workplaces get away with damaging their employees health for their own benefit. It's wrong. It shouldn't be happening in this day and age. And let's not pretend that getting another job is as easy as clicking your fingers. There are a lot of reasons why someone may not be able to straight away.