to feel sorry for this colleague but to still think she's being unreasonable

[justfloatingpast]

We have a big event coming up in work and it will be all hands on deck and longer hours than usual. We were told months ago that no leave would be approved for that particular week unless it was for an emergency of some sort.

A colleague has now asked for the entire week off because her boyfriend has booked them both a surprise holiday to celebrate her 40th birthday. Her request for leave has been refused. She has quite a key role to play in the forthcoming event and her absence would put other people under even more pressure, particularly as another colleague had to have emergency surgery last week so will not be available.

She's furious at not getting the leave, but AIBU to think her BF should have checked with her manager before booking the week away, particularly as I'm sure he would have been aware of the event as she's been working on it for months?

If she has known for months about it, and it was the same time as her 40th, I'm sure she must have mentioned something to her boyfriend about it? I certainly would have... is she just trying her luck and thinks they'll let her go as it's a whole holiday booked?

She's being unreasonable and trying it on. CF alert!

An ex of mine organised a surprise holiday for me but he checked with my manager that I could have the time off before booking it. I can't imagine anyone taking the risk of not getting time off.

She's going around with red eyes and a doleful expression at the moment and to be honest, my sympathy is starting to wear down. A couple of years ago her BF surprised her by telling her at the end of their week in Portugal that he'd booked them in for another week.
Her manager wasn't terribly impressed to get a phonecall from the hotel saying she wouldn't be back until the Monday week.

I mean she phoned from the hotel.

She’s being U, as was her BF for booking without checking.

She should have had a disciplinary warning for the last time.

CF.

Offer some anti hystamines and commiserate her on her allergy to being told no.

With the update sounds like she was chancing her arm.

Good that your boss didn’t fall for it and leave the rest of you in the shit.

Eh, is her bf (and she!) completely disconnected from reality?!

Ah the old "surprise holiday" excuse, there is no fucking way she didn't know about it, I call bullshit, she knew and assumed she'd get away with it once she said it was a surprise

Total bullshit, I know because I did it before. It was a really important trip and DHs work were being out of order re approving any leave (No one else off but would meant his boss would have to cover, DH always had to the other way round so it was a bit shit)

Genuine surprises then people would always check first!

So basically she got away with it before so thought she would again. I wouldn’t waste your sympathy on her.

Both your colleague and especially her boyfriend are being totally unreasonable. How on earth do they think it's ok to take holiday without prior authorisation at any time let alone when there is a big event coming up!

I don't believe her and I also don't believe that she didn't know about the other holiday being extended.

Her boyfriend probably gave the same story in reverse to his employer.

If it was genuine last time then she should be furious with DP for doing it again, knowing how difficult it made things for her last time

It never occurred to me that she might be making it up. I just assumed her BF was a bit thoughtless.

Anyhow she is definitely not getting the time off. Our Manager has been adamant about that.

Presumably if her fool BF booked this without checking she could take leave he will have made sure when booking that he can change the dates?

Do you think she'll call in sick?

I don't think she'd have the nerve. It would be blindingly obvious what she was up to.

I'd ignore her sniffles, red eyes, and mournful expression. She knew the deal and if her bf was foolish enough to book a 'surprise' without checking then he's a fool.

Yep, she's trying it on.

At the very least her BF is being incredibly stupid and arrogant , thinking that her job is so inconsequential that she can take a week off at the drop of a hat.

That having an extra week off thing..wtf! ..if someone had done that at my place of work where the managers are very accommodating, they still would have been sacked for unauthorised absence

Tell your colleague to stop crying and bringing everyone else down, life sucks sometimes but she can go away later and will enjoy it just as much then. She had enough notice about no time off that week. She is being petulant and childish - and she's forty for goodness sake, not 18!

I have a similar situation with a staff member atm. He only needs a couple of days and if he'd asked properly I'd have probably worked something out, but I'm almost certain he's lying so I'm not inclined to help. If I do agree it, his rule abiding /honest colleagues suffer.

I had a similar thing at work when we bought our first house. No time off not even the one day when we got the keys. I had a right face on because family and friends had been in my house before me (whilst it belonged to us) but it was a good job they did to help with the move! Suppose I got the good deal as my old and new house had been cleaned and everything put in place!

She's furious at not getting the leave that the rules apply to her.

Bet she calls in sick! I've had this as a manger before and is infuriating esp as everyone knows the rules. She should ahve had a displinary over the calling from.overseas instance too taking another week.