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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

...to not know how to respond to this message...

646 replies

WigglyBraddins · 22/10/2018 12:14

...from a "gentleman" with whom I had a recent liaison?

"Urgh, this is horrible for me, and for you, and it could well sour things and I would hate myself if it did. But, I have to be honest. I said you were not my normal type, physically, and that is very true. I am really attracted to slim women, I can't help it and have tried before, with it not getting very far. I completely accept that circumstances and free time dictate how we are able to shape ourselves. I understand if you are hurt by this, and trust me I hate it having to be a thing. I hate the idea of men dictating to a woman what they should look like, and I am not telling you to do anything. I am just saying, in the past at least, this issue has got in the way. If you did feel like meeting me in the middle on this then I am realistic and not as demanding as you might initially think. As I say I totally understand that your circumstances and how they are not exactly kind in this respect. There are literally zero other red flags, especially none outside of your control, maybe. Urgh, I am so sorry, I know how this issue can really fuck women up but as I say I can't help what I like, but I am super realistic about what is possible and what is not. Urgh urgh."

Suggestions for an appropriate response would be very much appreciated.

OP posts:
WhatsGoingOnEh · 22/10/2018 12:23

Has he already shagged you? If so, he's a massive hypocrite!

What prompted him to message you? Were you asking to see him again?

I'd love you forever if you wrote back, "Fair enough! I prefer men with above-average sized penises anyway so it seems we're just not a good match."

WorraLiberty · 22/10/2018 12:23

Don't lower yourself by replying.

Just block and move on.

Bluntness100 · 22/10/2018 12:23

That can't be real. If it is what a wanker,

So pick one of these,

Fuck off
Lol
Poor you.
I think we shoild end it. I'm sorry, it's not you it is me. I can't get my head round the state of your body and don't think I ever shall. I hope it doesn't fuck uou up. I'm sure someone will love you despite it.

Aprilislonggone · 22/10/2018 12:24

You def need to respond with reference to his penis size.
Then block.
And erase the message from your mind.

bbcessex · 22/10/2018 12:24

What the actual???? What was he like when you went out with him, OP? What a complete nutter!!

MrsTommyBanks · 22/10/2018 12:24

Fuck off you utter wanker.

WorraLiberty · 22/10/2018 12:24

And what does a recent 'liaison' mean?

A drink?

A long chat?

An actual date?

Sex?

OhDearGodLookAtThisMess · 22/10/2018 12:24

Amalgamate Dragongirl's and Loonoon's responses.

Job done.

peachgreen · 22/10/2018 12:25

Oh God I had this once OP. What a bellend. Just laugh at him. He doesn't deserve anything other than that.

Talith · 22/10/2018 12:25

Nothing and block forever. He's had his say and clearly that's the end of things. He basically prefers a slimmer partner. "Meet me in the middle" err, fuck that!!

Dating can be brutal and so for your own sanity just block and don't get into a debate. You deserve someone who adores every aspect and he ain't it.

DaphneFanshaw · 22/10/2018 12:25

What a fucking dick.

PennyCrayonsCrayon · 22/10/2018 12:25

A few paragraphs about his small dick should do it.

Best thing to do is block and ignore, but I'd be tempted to do the above!

Bluntness100 · 22/10/2018 12:26

I'm assuming a recent liaison means sex.

IStandWithPosie · 22/10/2018 12:26

I would reply with “oh goody, another one to add to the website, can I use your FB profile photo to go with the review?”

Volfgang · 22/10/2018 12:26

"I want to eat your cock - does my enormous appetite for cock put you off?"

DaphneFanshaw · 22/10/2018 12:26

I agree with not responding at all.

DioneTheDiabolist · 22/10/2018 12:26

Lol was invented for that shit.

DowntonCrabby · 22/10/2018 12:27

“No worries (name) all the best for the future”

Then for the love of god block his number and don’t engage any further.

You’ll laugh about this with your future partner and I suspect this guy will be very lonely after messing up several women’s mental health along the way. Sad

itswinetime · 22/10/2018 12:27

Glad you raised this i'm actually really attracted to 'insert flaw of his here' not aresholes Like you I have issues with this in the past and I completely understand how hard it raising sensitive issue like this, and that not everyone has the time to work on not being an arsehole. How about we both work on things and then when they are resolved we can see where things stand??

Then block delete and hope the next women is as strong as you to tell him to fuck off!

NoPhelange · 22/10/2018 12:27

I appreciate your honesty. And whilst we are being honest, I have been struggling with something myself. You're shall we say, a bit smaller than I am used to. Of course this is also something you can't help, so whilst I am too large and you are too small, I think it's best that we call it a day. I shall go forth with losing weight for me whenever I choose to, and you... well. Good luck!

What a gobshite.

Sexnotgender · 22/10/2018 12:28

Is he some kind of Adonis himself?

What an absolute knob.

SaucyJack · 22/10/2018 12:28

“I choose cake. Bye”

2cats2many · 22/10/2018 12:28

What a complete and utter arsehole. I would tell him to fuck right off and block.

HotNatured · 22/10/2018 12:28

Jesus is this for real?

What an utter, utter prick. Please don’t even think about responding. He needs to be binned pronto.

(Although the petty child in me would love to tell him all about his ‘strange looking penis’....)

StoorieHoose · 22/10/2018 12:28

im sure I've read that paragraph he sent you on someone elses thread on here!