To not want to sit through IL's holiday photos?

[Hooli]

PIL's have just returned from the holiday of a lifetime to Australia. They've saved for years and been to see family they haven't seen in over a decade so it's all very exciting for them. They've been gone for just over a month so we popped over last night to see them.

We stayed for tea but wanted to get back for kids bedtime. However, FIL had spent two days putting all their photos on a presentation which he wanted to show us. Boring as fuck right?

Not only that, but whilst away, MIL posted every single picture on Instagram AND sent 10+ pics a day to both me and DH on WhatsApp. Ten pictures a day for a month. Of Australian scenery.

Five minutes into the slideshow, I said we needed to go (kids were close to kicking off and knackered). A few hours later I got a message from MIL to say she was really upset, that they'd been looking forward to showing the kids the pictures and talking us through their trip that was so special to them.

WIBU? Should I have feigned interest?? I haven't replied yet...

Surely this is what Facebook is for? People upload a album of 509 pics, most of which have usually already been posted and friends can whiz through in 1 minute and like a random few.
But yes it's telling that the woman gets the step rebuke rather than the woman's son?

No, YWNBU.

Your in laws were being rude. Did they ask you if you wanted to sit through a two-hour presentation all about THEIR holiday that YOU did not go on? You’ve seen the pictures already. You weren’t there, why should you be interested in the minutiae of their holiday? Those photos are for THEM. Your FIL sounds like a prize bore. He’s the one without social skills. If I go on a holiday, I never feel the need to talk someone else through my photos. It’s about time someone called these bores out for their rudeness. Not for nothing was this kind of scenario the stuff of 70s sitcoms.

Sitting through each others stories is part of being in a family. We humour each others' boring stuff as well as enjoying the interesting stuff.

If the children were really too small to stay up then you should have asked to arrange a part two with an earlier start. It was rude to let him set up and then go after five minutes.

Where was your DP whilst this was going on? You said "we" wanted to get the children home to bed.

Surely this is what Facebook is for? People upload a album of 509 pics, most of which have usually already been posted and friends can whiz through in 1 minute and like a random few.

OP’s ILs are not of the Facebook generation. And they are not being unreasonable to think their son and his wife would be more interested in seeing the photos “properly” than their FB friends.

It meant a lot to them, I would have feigned interest and kept them happy. I love travel, I do t force photos or experiences on people but it’s always nice to be asked about it and share something lovely rather than boring humdrum conversations

Nobody ever tells men to be nice.

My advice would be the same if the OP was a man. This clearly meant a lot to the IL's and sometimes you just have to be a tad bored. I guarantee we've all bored family and friends at one time or another.

People are addressing their comments to the OP because according to her version of events, she was the one who initiated departure, not her husband.

That's a great update @Hooli, don't forget your bottle of wine ! 😂

Women with tired cranky children have to be nice though, and humour everyone. Pshaw

Why wasn’t the man helping with the cranky children...?

In any event they were BOTH rude and rather unkind. It clearly meant a lot to the PILs to share such an experience.

Nobody ever tells men to be nice

DH wouldn't need telling. He's not an arse and understands that showing a bit of interest in his parents holiday snaps would be important to them.

Honestly? You are lucky to have that sort of family and I think it's sad you don't appreciate them wanting to share the good times with you.

Some of my happiest childhood memories are sitting on the floor till my legs were numb being bored out of my literally tiny mind while my uncle did his slide presentation of their exotic travels, the grown-ups around me oohing and aahing while we children waited for the biscuits to be passed around.

Due to a hostile separation, bankruptcy and eventual suicide I am no longer part of that family. 45 years later I can see on Facebook they still have those sorts of family gatherings. I miss it like a pain, much worse than numb legs.

They are FB generation. These pictures are on Instagram and Facebook.

It also would not be 30 minutes. It would be at least two hours and there was a video too. Not made exclusively for us, they planned to show neighbours and friends too. We had listened intently to their stories through tea.

Kids 4 and 6. We didn't take toys and they were starting to get crabby (it was almost 8pm by this time) and the youngest was demanding my attention which means I couldn't really concentrate on the pics.

But I will apologise, thank you all

Definitely rude.

Great update, OP.

@HopeClearwater
for your hangover.
Some to go with it.

You'd have been better to explain that the dc were getting tired and could you leave it for another time soon. It was the leaving 5 minutes in that came across as rude.

Could you not have put something on the tv for the dc? Nearly 8pm on a Saturday night isn't late.

Some of my happiest childhood memories are sitting on the floor till my legs were numb being bored out of my literally tiny mind while my uncle did his slide presentation of their exotic travels, the grown-ups around me oohing and aahing while we children waited for the biscuits to be passed around.

My dad was a keen photographer and Friday/Saturday night slideshows were a regular part of my childhood with a box of Week End chocolates being passed around. I remember aunts uncles and friends being present sometimes too.

I think you were rude and quite unkind. Good that you seem to have realised this.

@Otterseatpuffinsdontthey

No hangover. Family full of dead or dying alcoholics. I won’t be going that way. So you can FOD.
Loads of people on this thread saying one thing from behind the safety of their keyboards when they’d have done exactly the same as the OP in the same circumstances.

Not made exclusively for us, they planned to show neighbours and friends too

Those poor people ...

@HopeClearwater
What's FOD?

I feel your pain. Our neighbours went away and the DH posted photos on Facebook every day. I am not on FB every day. He was hurt I obviously hadn't seen every single photo.

On another note: an aunt and uncle of mine drove from bottom of Sweden all the way to the top of Sweden and filmed almost the entire way. It was 6 hours of view of forrest through a car window. When my dad got up to go to the loo, they paused the video! Luckily, I had homework, so didn't see more than 1½ -2 hours.

OP, I do think it probably came across as a bit rude, however I really sympathise with your frustration over receiving a months worth of WhatsApp pictures from them already. I have a family member who send multiple completely pointless pictures, memes and 'jokes' every day and it takes all of my willpower not to just leave the chat. It is really intrusive to recieve 10 photos every single day and it's a pain having to go through deleting them off your phone. I can imagine that the annoyance over this probably led to you having less patience over the slides.

Kids 4 and 6. We didn't take toys and they were starting to get crabby (it was almost 8pm by this time) and the youngest was demanding my attention which means I couldn't really concentrate on the pics.

As everyone says, you were rude. You've probably bored them witless, if not titless, yourself on occasion.

However, with kids of that age, you have my sympathy. Had you stayed, they would hopefully have fallen asleep. But if they hadn't, your ILs would have faced cries of "mummy, mummy, this is sooooo boring, CAN WE GO NOW???".

You could have handled that so much better by saying at the time we should see the photos not at this time of night. I'm duress there were stories they wanted to tell you too. Your behaviour was very rude.