To be shocked that HQ told me off for swearing?!?

[XXPowerShield]

Not a TAT but will probably be deleted shortly regardless!

Long standing mner (I remember when all this were fields).

The day before yesterday there was a pile on in a single parent thread. It went on and on, real shit sandwich meanness directed at the op. Lots of supportive posters telling the unsupportive sorts to back off and OP rightfully pointed out that there was a lot of good advice too. I pmd OP and decided to report all the crappy posts to HQ so hopefully by morning the OP would have a nice shiny supportive thread to wake up to.

I cut and pasted most of my reports which consisted of "wanker" or "nasty vicious fucker" and got as many as I could before going to bed. It was a pile on, there was a lot.

I got an email from MNHQ yesterday telling me off.

Here it is;

Hi there XXPowerShield,
Thanks for all your reports, we are going to look at that thread now. We might ask the favour, though, that in future you stick to reporting for guidelines that are being broken because while we have no objection to swearing on the boards, 30 or so curse-laden reports weren't that pleasant for our staff to start their day with.
Best,
Hope
MNHQ

I am shocked, in the past when I have apologised for overly verbose sweary reports I have been told not to worry, HQ love the swearing. AIBU to be a bit at this response? Some of my reports were deleted but loads left standing including such gems as -

knowing that you were in this situation with three kids you decided to have another with someone who was not a DH, a life partner, who was clearly not able to support his child and neither were you.

I'm amazed at how little thought many women put into having babies...often with men they hardly know.

You didn't have to have four children with two deadbeats.

I wouldn't say the system is set up to fail, I would say that being a single mother with four children is intrinsically a losing situation to be in

what I dont get is if they were all wanted how comes the fathers dont bother

you decided to have another child when you already had ...You've made your situation worse,

I wasn't the only one annoyed by the stirrers on the thread (but maybe the only one who reported a bunch of nasty vicious fuckers to HQ).

I weep for humanity after reading some of these replies. ...One question to the benefit bashers do you want to live in Dickensian Britain?

I feel like I have missed a memo but am currently composing my reply to HQ but really how does one respond to the phrase "curse-laden"?!?

It sounds like you're way too over invested in someone else's thread.

I don;t have a problem with swearing when it is conversation (and in that I include forum written conversation)

But if I want to make a serious or sensible point when I am communicating something 'official' - such as a complaint, or reporting someone - I wouldn't swear. It weakens what you are saying, antagonises the recipient (because effectively you are swearing 'at' them - you are sending them a message with 30 swears in it.)

if you are genuinely angry or upset by somethingm it's always best to keep your emotion in check and state your case clearly in reasonable language, it is far more likely to get you lsitened to, and it is a matter of courtesy to the recipient (who has done nothing to deserve a torrent of swear wordsm however angry you may be at those you are reporting)

if you wanted to make one word reports, you could just have easily written 'bullying' 'personal attack' or whatever your particular complaint was. And you;d have made your point much more succinctly.

But, " wanker" is a descriptor and not against guidelines.
If it were against guidelines to be a "wanker", I'd have been deported by now.

( Some horrible contributions on that thread though, I agree OP. Some know how to stay within the rulz whilst being very nasty.)

So you reported about 30 posts & rather than put "personal attack" or soething like that you put "wanker", "vicious fucker" & you're really surprised that you've been asked not to do that?

I don't know whether to laugh or cry!

YABU and need to improve your communication skills!

Yes, diddl has made me realise why I responded the way I did in my previous comment:

You are using a personal attack to report a personal attack. It feels disingenuous.

I report seriously nasty posts. Sometimes just
"Bitchplopper"
"GF"
Even just
"!!!!"
"FFS!"
or
"Not in the spirit, etc"

Sometimes I ask MNHQ to check out the poster to see if they make a habit of coming to MN just to pick a fight/give someone a kicking.

I don't usually swear in the reports though

What's wrong with reporting something without swearing? Remember, the people who read the reports are not in the same emotive frame of mind as you are.

Op, just write why you're reporting it. So for example it breaks guidelines, is a personal attack, you think it's a troll etc

No need to add a profanity laden description of your opinion of the poster.

I mean you are aware there is no guideline about wankers posting, the site would be a barren waste ground if there was 🤣

Maybe it was the lack of clarity or they disagreed with your term.
I mean a cunt is far worse than a wanker or twat,

Now the use of windowlicker above was a bad move, that is a completely unacceptable term and disablist.

Stick to wanker, fucker, twat and cunt, they are much safer

just write why you're reporting it

I was

WHICH THREAD WAS IT?!!!!

Posted before I saw your last post OP, re "window licker"
That's really the pits to describe anyone in that way.

ANYONE?

call a spade a spade, you are my hero

Swearing while reporting is unnecessary. I wouldn't like to start my working day with that.

Sorry was thinking of the aphextwin video for window licker (I am old) as an alternative for creepy fucker but accept that is also used as a disablist term and will strike from the lexicon.

windowlicker

That is far far worse than anything you reported!

Never mind. I know which one it is now1

www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=window%20licker

Please don't use this term, anyone.

Bear in mind these reports were sent of an evening, I did not know they would be sitting there til morning in a big pile

I have reported posts before with just the words 'goady fucker'.

I suppose if you did multiple ones and were using lots of swear words, whoever was reading might not like it.

OP I’ve re-read that message you got from HQ... it’s so prissy it keeps making me cringe.

Also it doesn’t make sense. If you had a swear word in your username (which we know is allowed) and reported a bunch of times then the mod would also be seeing “curse-laden” reports. Would this mod find that unpleasant too? Is there a “curse” quota we each have to keep within, and if so what is the acceptable number?

It sounds like maybe MNHQ are saying that they think that some of the posts you reported didn't breach guidelines. So, by just posting a one word sweary report about lots of them, you're not actually giving them any context about why it broke guidelines and to them it just seems like a page of swears, which obviously wasn't your intention OP.