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Original poster

Husband has blocked me on social media?!

291 replies

LondonMummy1987 · 11/10/2018 14:30

Apologies in advance if I'm just being incredibly stupid or naive or paranoid! I'm not sure if i'm mad and unreasonable or not!

So I have just gone to upload a photo onto instagram, and tag my husband in it as it is a picture of our sons. I couldn't tag him.
I thought maybe he has deleted his instagram account (despite the fact that he uses it alot) so I searched for him and it came up that the account is private and I need to request to follow. (I couldn't see anything, not his bio or how many photos/followers he has)
I then logged out of insta and searched for him, and it came up that the account is private but did state how many posts/followers he has, as well as his bio.

The bio is another worry. It used to say "happily married father of two", now it just says "father of two".

Am I wrong to worry?! I don't know what to do. I haven't confronted him as we are both at work and he will just change it and make me out to be a nutter!

OP posts:
Storm4star · 12/10/2018 09:40

I think this is probably why quite a few people suggested the catfish approach. As now you can't be sure if he's being truthful or not. This is the problem when people say "just ask". You can't rely on someone telling the truth.

If he is telling the truth, I agree with the pp's who've said him blocking you, and all your family, because you had a row is a massive over reaction. I think you're doing the right thing to get everything in order and being prepared. Hope it all works out for you OP Flowers

NobHob · 12/10/2018 09:46

Well done for speaking to him OP, and maybe the answer is true, if a bit petty on his part. I hope so.

My only word of caution is this. I spent decades believing the very plausible explanations given to me by my exDH for weird stuff that happened and times when he just disappeared. But it was all a massive web of lies. Infact it turned out that the entire relationship was.

So I guess it's up to you. Accept the explanation and get on with life, or make a note and keep investigating things that bother you or don't add up. I guess it depends what kind of life you want really.

civicxx · 12/10/2018 09:53

Blocking your wife on social media after a row is absolutely pathetic I wouldn't be so sure this is the truth. Did you ask about his Bio?

MsMotherOfDragons · 12/10/2018 10:04

Would you have access to his Instagram DMs?

Original poster
LondonMummy1987 · 12/10/2018 10:17

He unblocked me straight away as I was sitting next to him. His hand was shaking. He didn't seem to know "how" to unblock me, but got there in the end, which I think was all an act, as he clearly knew how to block me in the first place. I saw the block list, there were members of my family and 4 other people, none of whom I know, all women. He said that they were just randoms who followed him and their posts were irritating, but again i'm not sure that I could even begin to believe this. He also changed his bio back to happily married. I quickly clicked onto his profile on my phone and saw all of his posts before he could delete anything, but I had to deal with the children so I left his side. He was still on his phone so could've easily have blocked someone else without my knowing.

Reading back over what I've written makes me feel so gullible and pathetic.

I didn't continue the row, as I didn't want my children to hear us arguing, and I thought i'd let him feel like he had the upper hand. But I will do some more digging and organise my life and go from there. x

OP posts:
Figgygal · 12/10/2018 10:21

Yep this didn't just happen not specifically you and members of your family he's done it for a reason no it's just working out what that reason is

sockunicorn · 12/10/2018 10:35

@londonmummy1987

have a quick look through his recent photos and see whose liking them. Have a look if any of the names come up time and time again.

Storm4star · 12/10/2018 10:40

OP, this is what makes me so angry about these types of situations, that the innocent party is left feeling stupid in some way. Please don't feel that way. You have done nothing wrong. You're married with children and you don't want to break that up lightly. That is fully understandable and what the majority of people would do in your situation. You aren't being gullible because your eyes are open. If he is up to something he will trip himself up somewhere along the line. The fact his hand was shaking is very suspicious. If his explanation was true why was he so nervous? You are 100% doing the right thing. Use this time to get everything organised etc and then, if something else does come to light, you are fully prepared.

Absla · 12/10/2018 11:23

@sockunicorn good advice, If there is one girl on particular look at her photos see if he’s liking them or make a fake account and see if he’s liking hers... this is a huge assumption of course, it’s probably nothing! Just petty arsehole H!

fifithefoof · 12/10/2018 12:05

Oh no. Doesn't sound good, especially after your update. The blocking of your family is the thing that clinched it for me. Sad

SinisterBumFacedCat · 12/10/2018 12:39

Personally I think it's s bit fishy. Sorry Op. Flowers

ihatethecold · 12/10/2018 13:03

Did you ask him why he changed his bio op?

Andromeida59 · 12/10/2018 13:31

As much as the changing of the bio did raise a red flag. I'd be more concerned about the way he's making you feel. You deserve more than to be blamed for every little thing. He sounds immature and bad tempered. Is that something you really want to live with? Apart from this issue and the arguing, are you happy?

Wishing you all the best OPFlowers

RangeRider · 12/10/2018 13:53

The blocking of your family is the thing that clinched it for me
Why? If he was pissed off enough with her to block her then it's not unreasonable to think that he'd block her family too in a fit of pique. A touch of 'bugger her and her bloody family'. And the same for the 'happily married' - he was pissed off, he didn't see himself as 'happily married'.
For me the key thing is that he changed it all back immediately. I think you're all jumping to the usual cheating bastard scenario because it's 'fun' to make someone else feel like crap about their relationship, and because many of you posting it seem to have been cheated on in the past - it's influenced your thinking.
Actually some people do get in a huff when they've had a row and they lash out in some way - his way (probably fairly common these days) is to block you. And now he's unblocked you. Don't look for problems that don't exist or you'll disappear down a dark hole of suspicion.

MulticolourMophead · 12/10/2018 13:57

Don't look for problems that don't exist or you'll disappear down a dark hole of suspicion.

I tend to follow my dad's saying: Prepare for the worse and hope for the best.

There's a chance the DH is cheating, or at least wants to, so I'd make a plan for a split, just in case, and then see how everything goes. Maybe this can all be sorted, in which case, great. But it's not bad advice to know what you'll do if it goes pear shaped.

Bluntness100 · 12/10/2018 13:59

It's very unusual he blocked you, your whole family and then changed his bio.

Must have been some argument, that's all I can say.

Or he's lying through his teeth.

Makethisquick · 12/10/2018 14:03

My ex fiance changed his bio on social media and he was on a hook up website AND cheating with a colleague from another branch.

Best of luck. Gut instinct isn't often wrong.

fanfan18 · 12/10/2018 14:19

Okay I know I'm proper going against the grain here but I had a MASSIVE row with my fiance about 3 months ago. I walked out with the dog and drove a few miles and walked for a bit.

I was so angry at him that I deleted him from FB, blocked him on Insta and even changed my Insta bio from the couple emoji and little dog to just a girl emoji and little dog!! I defo wasn't cheating and this thread has just made me realise I never changed it back!!

We are getting married in two weeks.......

Your husband might not be as hot headed as me though. I may well be wrong but just wanted to see from another point of view.

loveyoutothemoon · 12/10/2018 14:54

But blocking your whole family...what an overreaction! I'd really be on guard from now on...he could be up to something.

RangeRider · 12/10/2018 14:57

fanfan Exactly! It happens. People overreact.

HandlebarTash81 · 12/10/2018 14:58

His hand was shaking is a huge red flag!

NobHob · 12/10/2018 15:17

That's what thought Handlebar

RangeRider · 12/10/2018 15:29

His hand was shaking is a huge red flag!
FFS. If he was that bothered about OP finding something out he'd have just refused. More like his hand was shaking (if at all) because he was getting pissed off again.

Original poster
LondonMummy1987 · 12/10/2018 15:37

Thank you all for your comments, I really do appreciate the support and advice from all angles.

His hand was shaking with nerves, he definitely wasn't angry at this point.

Thank you all again for your help, I have made my mind up now.

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 12/10/2018 15:51

Why was he nervous unblocking uou on Instagram? I'm fairly sure he's not normally nervous around you.

So what did he think you were going to see? Who were the other women he'd blocked?