AIBU to think my 4yo DS is an anatomical anomaly?!

[Rinoachicken]

How is it biologically possible for a small child to do a poo so BIG that it won’t flush down the toilet?! No word of a lie, it is as long as his THIGH (and not much different in diameter)!!! Where in his body is he keeping it??!!! It’s not even a one off occurrence, this is a regular weekly deposit!!!!!

I am seriously considering buying a poo knife!!!

Dear god. My DS is the same. We regularly marvel at how much poo he produces. It can fill the whole pan a couple of times over.

We also had an unflushable one a few months ago and had to resort to buckets of hot water and latterly, a hanger

MN is so often a learning experience
but "poo knife" is something I wish I could forget knowing !

Poo knife, lucky Barry and a bucket.... Ladies I am crying

I have the cat equivalent. I swear, if I hadn’t witnessed our new rescue cat deposit a human adult sized shit then I would have properly had a go at the dc for shitting in the litter tray.

Thing is, my DD gets excited with her Lucky Barry's. She tells her teacher she went for a poo and had a lucky Barry! 😂

@ArcheryAnnie I remember having a similar thought process when not long ago when my dd was 3. I kept the photo long enough to show dp.

I also marvel at the multi colour poos my 4 year old does.

DP has just informed me that in Scotland a lucky Barry is know as a ghostie.

And DDog, who is about 18" long, regularly curls out a12" crap.

Any turd that sticks out above the waterline is known as a "call the coastguard" in our house, because they'd be a hazard to shipping.

Blimey.

Until this thread I thought my friend was over exaggerating her ds’s poos. Quite possibly not.

I’m pleased it’s not something I've ever had to deal with!

Thank you so much ladies! I am not alone with my monster poo producing child!!! Will definitely try the hot water thing.

This one was poking out the top of the water this morning! It’s just insane!

He’s only just started school and if he ever does it there I honestly don’t think their little ‘reception child size’ toilets will be able to cope, or possibly even contain it!!

Bajesus i’m so glad i’m on my own at work today.This thread has me howling laughing 🤣

Sweet Jesus - this is the thread to end all threads. 😂

My now 7yo DS has for years regularly produced poos that block the toilet. I use bamboo skewers to break them up.

I forgot about the poop knife!

I thought a “ghostie” was when the poo comes out with such force and speed it goes round the U bend without flushing- so disappears.
My DS did one once, he was about to get in the bath and I was in the bathroom too watching younger DS. He stood up and said “Where has my poop gone?!” We were amazed! I still laugh at our confusion and amazement that it has disappeared

There's no toilet at our local park so I tend to take a fold up potty. Last weekend my 5 year old did such a big poo it nearly touched her bottom and filled a third of the plastic bag. It was about the size of a grapefruit. How???? Thank God for the potty 😂 Do kids shit in the woods? Damn right!

Totally normal. My two twig like sons produce giant boughs.

Saying that, I had issues in China with the remarkably dainty drainage to the U bend. A rice based diet must be much less fibrous than a Western diet

The prize goes to the one left in the leisure centre. Brownie goes into the toilet and comes out immediately disgusted by the poo. I breezily walk in the cubical to flush it away, and there is a giant log with a diameter of at least 4 inches that is totally unflushable. A crowd of Brownies surge in to oggle at the giant poo and shortly after ran out gleefully waving their arms shouting "Brown Owl! Brown Owl! We found a poo and it was THIS BIG!!!" I took the easy way out and reported to reception. Someone must have limped out of there looking like they'd just birthed a baby!

@Iputthescrewinthetuna yes! Hers took all of 10 seconds

Mumsnet : The place where people come to boast of the size of their kids turds,and the ease with which they expel them.
Plans points if they have a pristine arse after they have evacuated their bowels.
Do they have a reward system for size/efficiency .
Priceless fucking priceless.
😂😂😂😂😂

Thank you for giving me such a laugh on this dreary wet weekend. Lucky Barry's indeed.

My 5yo dgs can fill the toilet. Maybe they just save it up?

My 4 year old grandson did one so big he came rushing in to get me to look at it. It was huge and poking out the water as well. Proud grandma moment!

Are all these poos fresh? If a poo has been in water for any length of time it swells.

Completely fresh. We don’t leave shit in the toilet long enough for it to swell!

In our house a lucky Barry is called a ghoster ..
My kids regularly do the most giant turds I've ever seen.
They like to shout me and show me.
To be fair I'd probably be proud if I did a giant one like that

A lucky Barry is a ghostie in this house 👻