To think this “hilarious” card is actually depressing?

[Decanter]

lovelayladesigns.co.uk/Cards/Anniversary_Cards/up-the-bum.html

I have 2 DDs and hate how this kind of crap is being normalised. Fucking hilarious Layla

Really, Mandarine? And how precisely did you find this out?
If you want to share your love of voyeurism, I'd suggest starting a new thread.

I can’t understand why people care so much about other people’s sex lifes. If it’s between consenting adults they can do what they like.
Teach your kids about consent and how to say no (and listen when someone says no!) unless they enjoy it and want to do it if you really want to protect them. It’s the best armoury you can give them. You can’t protect by trying to make certain sex acts taboo.

Alphabravo how about you read the fucking thread and tell me where I said I’d had anal sex and that it hurt instead of wading in at page 19 with a poor attempt at at a bloody mikedrop. FFS.

gamerwidow spot on. However unfortunately your comment will fall to the wayside because anal is such an unnatural thing how did it ever become legal 🙄

It fascinates me that people who are saying anal is okay if you go about it right - when i say okay i mean in the sense of it shouldn't be illegal - are being slated to high heaven by people who are also claiming anyone who enjoys anal is calling them a prude. Some of you are the biggest bunch of hypocrites i've come across in a while!!

I could've sworn I've haven't read most of what some posters are assuming others of and I've RTF bloody T. Loads of people being deliberately obtuse again. Its the worst thing about this place sometimes!

After 5 years of exploring the karma sutra

Hopefully, you meant kama sutra. Otherwise, not sure what you actually explored.

It’s acceptable to say anal is only used because my sex life was so dull but not for me to say I enjoy good sex and doing anal?
You’re all mental

It's because of pps like this that I left the thread for a while.

Never mind that the first accusation was of vanilla people having boring sex. Other people replied that the opposite could well be true.

And never mind respecting people. They must be mental.

(Sigh)

Some people seem to project a lot.

Er no, EarlyWalker. You came on with a deliberately provocative statement - you know full well you did and it’s there in black and white - and now you’re being obtuse. That’s it really.

I couldn’t care less what you do in bed, but anyone with eyes and ears who lives in this society will be aware that there is certainly more pressure on teen girls to be “ok” with anal these days, in a way that didn’t exist when I was a teen. It’s obviously irrelevant to equate anal sex with “better sex” because what constitutes better sex varies so much person to person. However, the “give anal a try and don’t be a prude” message is one that’s increasingly perpetrated in correlation with the accessibility to internet porn and its more insidious than ever. Just like, “you’re a prude if you don’t let him slap you,” or “yes I love it when he comes in my face,” or “isn’t choking a hoot,” or “what do you mean you wouldn’t perform lesbian sex for him in a threesome - you’re sooo boring”, etc etc. Yes there has always been pressures on teens, but the nature of the pressures are changing and anal is one if these pressures. Such pressures become internalised in all of us to some extent - eg I had all my body hair lasered some year’s ago - nobody thought to do this when I was a teen. No sexual practise is any more “liberating” than the next and only a fool would think this the case. That, I think, is all people are trying to say on this thread and it’s why the “I do anal so I’m so much more sexually adventurous and empowered” statements are disingenuous and a load of bollocks.

@Mandarine

No sexual practise is any more “liberating” than the next, and only a fool would think this the case. That, I think, is all people are trying to say on this thread ... And it’s why the “I do anal so I’m so much more sexually adventurous and empowered” statements are disingenuous and a load of bollocks.

This in spades. ^ I am fucked off to the nth degree with people saying because they do X, Y, and Z in the bedroom, that their sex lives are more exciting and interesting, and they are more 'empowered' because of it.

These are the same type who have a relationship with a man, have kids with him, do all the wifework, and the lions share of the childcare, whilst holding down a job themselves, but they won't get married, and take his name, because they won't 'bow to the patriarchy.'

I make this comparison, because the ones who do anal, (who are mocking and berating those women who DON'T,) have the same kind of condescending, mocking attitude as the women who won't get married, because it's boring and pedestrian, and 'only a piece of paper.' It's the same kind of snarky attitude.

And like you say Mandarine, anal sex is expected MUCH more these days, (mostly because of porn) and yes, girls ARE made to feel prudish and boring if they don't do it. And I cannot believe the posters who are making out there are no risks with it, and if you hate it, you are 'NOT DOING IT RIGHT...'

And I am now hiding this thread, because the anal-lovers on here, are really pissing me off, and I can't be doing with their nonsense anymore.

Whilst I enjoy it myself, I certainly wouldn't berate anyone who chooses not to do. It's a very personal choice.

“After 5 years of exploring the karma sutra

Hopefully, you meant kama sutra. Otherwise, not sure what you actually explored.”

I’m sure she’ll find out in due course......

Most people would feel quite attacked, after simply stating I liked anal sex. And then making a joke which I’ve said was a joke you all feel the need to berate me. I’m not allowed to have my own option because it’s different to yours. But that’s fine I can bite back.

And no I’m not a ‘dosed do everything for my husband type’ he shags me up the ass when I ask for it and cooks my dinner so your assumptions are sadly wrong.

It’s an autocorrect failure, obviously. But it’s obvious your comebacks are as weak as your sex lives when you resort to grammar.

Honestly the assumptions are brilliant 😂😂 pretty sure you will find plenty of folk who do all the 'womens work' that refuse to get married AND don't like or participate in anal!! Still finding it so funny that folk are moaning they have been called dull are retaliating with their own insults. Honestly, if you want a proper discussion about assumptions & name calling, throwing in your own is not the way forward.

I think it's pretty clear tho that whilst folk have gone round the houses, everybody is against the idea of anybody feeling pressured into anything. Not sure however that telling people what they can & can't do is the right way forward...making forced sex illegal hasn't stopped rapists.

This thread, like many others, is making me so glad I'm not young any more. Among the hundreds of posts here the one that really resonates for me is the woman who describes the pressure in the current dating scene to participate in anal sex and the reaction to her refusal. How dare anyone call someone else a prude because she doesn't like it? How dare a guy she's never even met question her about it and write her off because it's off the table?

What next? You're a prude because you won't let someone piss on you? Or tie you up?

Early - give over fgs. You didn’t simply state that you enjoy anal sex. If you had, fair enough.

Your words were (again) -

“Maybe a lot of you would be a lot less uptight if you were getting better sex”

Now again we have -

“Your comebacks is are as weak as your sex lives.”

Tbh, this is just daft now and it’s not about you, but a more general issue. However, if you come out with such daft statements, people will obviously post “comebacks” whether their sex lives are weak or absolutely magnificent like yours - thats MN for you and karma.

Yes and I put a wink face after the first statement and then posted in my next one that it was clearly a joke.

The last statement I just made after you all attacking me saying I can bite back too. It is not about me but you vile people seem intent on attacking me because I like anal sex.

Are woman not allowed to enjoy things? Not every woman is a victim you know, it does great injustice to those who are to imply it over and over.

BlueLady, sadly I think actually your what next has already happened. I have female and male peers who would call someone frigid, a prude, vanilla etc for not being into golden showers or bdsm.

You’re the one who is wilfully misinterpreting and now trying to present as a victim. I’ve said many times, your sex life is of no relevance.

If that's the case, I'm even gladder I'm old! And very, very happy to be a prude!

It’s clear to me that some people perhaps feel insecure in their sex lives so took my comment to heart - it was not intended and I’ve now said 4 times it was a joke.

However, I am allowed to enjoy things. Some people DO enjoy anal sex, this is ok and none of anyone else’s business to object. Anyone who wishes to participate in anal sex should go right ahead it is not affecting anyone else.

No one should feel pressured into doing it, of course no one is going to disagree with that however, if you seriously think a card is going to pressure someone then you’re a bit out of touch with how boys/men behave to get their own way - certainly not with a card.

If you don’t want to do something, don’t do it. But you have no right to judge anyone who does want to do it.

As for the problem with pressuring young girls. We need to work on teaching our sons not to be pigs and our daughters to say no. Yes maybe anal is talked about more these days as a normal sexual act, to me I don’t see it as any thing different, it’s just like oral and fingering and sex - again if you don’t want to participate in any of these things then say no.

To deliberately call anal out as being disgusting or whatever is a bit weird really (in my opinion)

Nobody’s taking your initial comment to heart Early because anal is probably about as irrelevant as the price of fish to most people. It’s just irritating because it sounds affected and “try hard cool” and is typical of the insidious way young girls might be manpulated into practices they would rather not try and would most probably not even occur to them.

Apart from that, I have no issue whatsiever with the rest of your most recent post and really you could have just said all that in the first place.

It’s clear to me that some people perhaps feel insecure in their sex lives

I agree.
To the point that they feel the need to misrepresent posts, call others mad and vile and effectively call them prude. It's a clear sign of something amiss.

To my mind the people who are insecure in their sex lives are those who feel obligated to call people who don't share their practices prudes.