To think this is odd

[Cobblersandhogwash]

Is this odd?

So we know this couple from our ds's school. Good fun. Socialised with them four or five times. I like them.

The man's dad died recently. Funeral is today and over 100 miles away. DH is going. He decided today. He doesn’t know the dead man and barely knows the man in the couple. Just had four or five social albeit very enjoyable social occasions with them and other people there.

It’s also a work day.

I just think the card and flowers is enough. We aren't at all close but we like them. I know them better than dh as I do the school runs.

It's odd, right?

I think it was thoughtless of him to go if he’s then going to land you with more work / less support when you are ill.

Supporting your family gets less public kudos but it’s damned well supposed to be your first priority!

That was kind of her.
Perhaps your DH and hers had discussed his father's illness. Anyway it's good that the family appreciated the effort, so kudos to your DH.

Hope you’re all on the mend soon.
I was asking about your school run as o thought it quite unkind that DH was letting you go out ill then buggering off on his spontaneous trip

It's not a difference between Ireland and England, it's a difference between small communities and larger ones. In DH's Jewish community it's perfectly normal to go to every.single.funeral regardless of whether you knew the deceased personally. This is in London but it's still a small community and everyone knows each other or knows someone who knows someone. They also bury very quickly so you have to be nearby or very fast to get there. We went to one once which we were told about at 1pm on the actual day of the funeral at 4pm!

It's 100mile trip? Are his social boundaries & etiquette a bit off? How do you know he's actually going? Could he be sloping off elsewhere. Or, could he be wanting more than friendship from one or both of them. Odd. But I'm not a very trusting person.

@CSIblonde

He went. OP had a text to confirm and thank DH for going. So could have been an entirely selfless and thoughtful gesture after all for this acquaintance he is hoping to befriend.

But it doesn't mean he wasn't meeting someone else on the way there or back though

I'd be so embarrassed if DH did this, it seems very over the top and desperate.