To think I’m sat on a train opposite the twattist mum ever!!!

[Pumkinfailure]

Child is 3
Mum very loudly asking her to explain the elements that make up nitrous oxide. Child looks blank. ‘Come along darling, you know your elements. Ox.......ox....y......gen! Well done darling.’ 3 year old still hasn’t spoken.
Now darling let’s do some reading, shall we read lord of the rlord nhs, you do love that don’t you’
Would you like a coconut and peanut raw ball, we don’t want to eat too much because remember darling bed time is 6.30 after cuddles.
We are now doing maths, 44-13? Loudly.
I’ve been on this train 7 minutes. God help me!!!?

Play this on a loop. LOUDLY.

I know a couple who are raising their daughter like this. She has no dolls, teddies, no make-believe - just the facts Jack. She learns from science books only. So for her 5th birthday I sent her a pink and purple card covered in glitter with a flying unicorn on it.

@SodTheBloodyLotOfThem - NOBODY wants a coconut and peanut raw ball.

I was just thinking "oh, coconut and peanut raw ball sounds nice" ☺️

But I do love coconut.

I would suggest shoving the full supply of coconut and peanut balls into the mother's mouth. It might help her quiet for the rest of the journey.

If they're the Bounce protein balls then the child is lucky - they're lush.

The refurbished amazon one is good if you’re not bothered about Rust.

Wrong thread, sorry.

Or perhaps another orifice....?
Good spelling word.

I really don't get the vitriol on here towards a parent who is engaging with her child in such a positive way

Engaging? Child is very passive in this senario.

Tell the child the "Idunup" joke from a previous thread!

The little girl in my above posts parent's are an oceanographer and a marine biologist and are so very pretentious.

I'd like to send the little girl this;

I don't mind protein balls but I'm certainly not buying them. The Bounce ones are nearly £2 for 1 ball

Maybe she's doing some sort of social experiment to see how people react. I'd be looking round for hidden cameras!!

Qwerty is a word!

does anyone couple up other chats going on - like the one with the 2 dc in the library - can I say I would prefer the noisy dc in the library . cant help think that this is mum who has a nanny normally & doesn't have a clue.

@chemenger ahhhh another 44 Scotland Street fan!! Good choice. Alexander McCall Smith is a riot and Bertie my absolute favourite character in the series.

Teach it the baby shark song!

With the added verses "lets all dance (doo doo do doo di doo), let's all sing, let's all jump...
followed by "it's the end..." Then just as every adult in the place thinks "oh thank fuck for that!" Jump in with
"just kid-ding, doo doo do doo di doo, just kidding doo doo do doo di doo, just kidding doo doo do doo di doo, START AG-GAIN, Baby shark...."

Qwerty is not a word! Surely it isn't? You're making me doubt myself. Anyone who thinks qwerty is a word, what do you think it means?

I accidentally performance parented once when I had a blocked ear and couldn’t hear how loud I was being 🤦🏻‍♀️

Kew, I think we all know what 'qwerty' refers to - but it isn't actually a real word - it simply refers to QWERTY!

I think this parent has been travelling the country and was sitting near my in my daughters gym class today. Her son was making up animal poems and reading his school book but really didn't say anything at all!

‘FruitofAutumn

Why does it enrage you OP.I really don't get the vitriol on here towards a parent who is engaging with her child in such a positive way.’

It enraged me because it was exhausting, constant, loud and just so unnecessary and breaks every social norm of train travel- which is not to let the whole carriage hear your conversation.
And I’m premenstrual.

It's not engaging if the child isn't responding. It's dominating.

Bet all nearby adults would have joined in if you had started baby shark, I know I would!

oh i wish i was there!

ChriSt on a ferris wheel. I couldn't even answer those questions.
I'm not kidding, either.