Shitty homemade Christmas Gifts

[justilou1]

I’m really loving the homemade Christmas gifts thread, and am watching it for inspiration. Can we start one for ideas for things to avoid - ie glitter-encrusted his&hers champagne flutes.

A knitted pouch for a kit kat

I would like a bit more info on the baked bean cakes. I assume these are the small tins. But do you just grease them or do you need to line them properly as you do normal Christmas cakes? Strikes me as a bit of a fiddly job.

I'd often rather have home made (wonky, odd flavours) than store-bought stuff. I can get store-bought stuff much cheaper & exactly what I want for myself. Why would I want to buy at a fete/fundraiser or be given store-bought stuff?

Home-made is interesting & different, at least.

I'm a very good baker so nobody ever gives me home-baked goods. I do get given tins of commercial biscuits that are typically dull or dubiously flavoured but I find that crisping them in the oven and putting them into a fridge cake or chocolate salami is an acceptable way to use them up.

Can I ask what the problem is with the home-made biscuits? Are they not good recipes or poorly executed? Or is it the limited shelf-life?

I like cookery writers who take the time to detail how long their cookies/biscuits/cakes store for and how to do it. I especially like the ones who mention whether or not they're robust enough to send through the post. :)

I would immensely rather have home-made edibles, even the dodgy ones that frankly I don't fancy eating or can make better myself, than the standard 'I ran through B&M Bargains on Christmas Eve and saw what stuck to me' stuff we get from a certain relative. She must spend a good 20 quid in there, and I just wish instead she would get us one nice, cheaper thing we or DD actually wants, instead of showering us in gifts that we then need to keep and wheel out regularly to show we really did appreciate them.

At least with food stuff you have a solid gold reason to not have it any more when the person concerned next visits.

oh... and store bought is probably high in salt, mono-digylericerides, other ingredients I don't understand or want. Home-made stuff often has several flavours other than SUGAR.

Melanippe
Maybe I'm being too charitable but arent people talking about crappy gifts that are homemade?

I hate baths so if a friend gave me home made bath salts for Christmas then it's a bit of a crappy gifts.
I can't paint or draw so if I bought a plate from Poundland and then wrote an inspirational quote on it and gave it as a present then it's a crappy gift.

But I'm good at baking and making edible gifts so if my friend loves flavoured spirits then a box with mini flavoured gins, vodkas etc is a lovely gift because it matches their interest and tastes and is actually nice to drink.
One friend was complaining she couldn't find a nice door stop for her new house and felt lots of the craft fayre ones to be extortionate so I made her one in the colours of her house. That's a nice present, but a fabric door stop for someone who doesn't want or need one would be a rubbish gift.

Gifts are rubbish if it's more about the giver than the recipient.

Gifts are rubbish if it's more about the giver than the recipient

This

Homemade gifts are lovely if you have thought about the recipient. 15 jars of chilli chutney distributed to your nearest and dearest because you can make it in one go when half of them will hate it is not. Even if there is a “handmade with love” sticker attached.

On the baked bean can thing - I haven't done it but can totally follow the logic.

it's not about the previous contents of the tin. It's the shape. Soup tins or any other tin the same shape would work in the same way. Food cans are made from the same material as baking tins! Yes I'd line the can with greaseproof paper just for ease of getting the cooked cake out, food can's aren't spring sided or loose bottomed like many other cake tins.

All the "ewww cakes cooked in bean tins" people are nuts. Probably the same people who turn their noses up at anything homemade, or who have the palate of a toddler.

I'm not a Christmas cake fan either but I might try a food can gingerbread or something.

Anything coloured in by a child

The best presents are those made with thought, I love them.

Dunno what's happened to MN lately but it's full of miserable bastards.

If anyone who knows me is reading this.... I’d rather just have a fiver in a card, ta. Keep your nasty gingerbread to yourself please.
If I did know you after reading that, I'd be more of the mindset with that grabby attitude you're getting nothing from me then.

If anyone's reading this who knows me - I love anything you get me. As it means you thought of me and wanted to get me a present.
I don't care if that sounds shit or twee or whatevs.

That's you off my Christmas list saucy 😁

I hate ginger!!!!

Is soggy/nasty gingerbread a thing? Like my question above - is it the recipe, the way it's executed or what?

What makes it nasty? The texture or the flavour? Is it useless even with custard as a pudding? Can it not be dried a little and then used as a sprinkle with yoghurt or made into cake balls?

I'm a very keen baker and I'm interested in what is going awry with either biscuits or cake.

can someone link me to the homemade xmas gifts thread please?

you lot really dont like homemade gifts,
I've had texts from many friends and family asking if I'm doing my homemade biscuits/cakes this year, and could they order a batch as they loved theirs last year and think their auntie/gran/friend/ would love them.
(P.s i am a baker though maybe that helps)

@JensenElephant
A framed picture made from buttons
A book folded into something else-origami don’t know what it is called but hideous and ruins books.
Any framed picture made of rolled up paper
Anything with the words gin or prosecco these I do not get

Almost anything with a persons name on it ^last year I got a big mug with [my name] Crazy Dog Lady and a silhouette of my dogs breed (akita) in secret santa at work, it was probably the best secret Santa I've ever received the colleague obviously took time to purchase it and purchase something personal to me, I use it proudly every day, its probably my most used present i have ever had, next my kitchen aid mixer my husband bought me granted its not a romantic gift no, however, a very very useful one which i love

I personally hate the whole Christmas gift thing... I am sooo glad that we don't do them any more. Except for Children (anybody under 18!). A card is more than enough for me.

Oh, thank goodness Lyn

One pointless tat exchange down, 485 to go.....

We’re not in the 1800s any more....
If you can get to a decent shopping centre, it’s easy enough to find a thoughtful, little something for a fiver for someone if you know them well enough.

Yes, maybe you can get to a "decent shopping centre" if you''re lucky enough to live near one/afford bus fares/petrol etc to get to one.
Even if you then do manage to get to one, your "oh, it's only a fiver" train of thought falls down because if you have a few to buy for that soon adds up.
I don't home make presents by the way, as I'm far too disorganised lol.
I love receiving them though. If anyone's reading this, we love home made biscuits, cake, wine too for me and jams and chutney.
They last about 5 seconds in this house

P.s i am a baker though maybe that helps

I reckon it might!

But I absolutely do not hate all homemade gifts. There are some I really enjoy getting. A crap attempt at a book fold (is that what they’re called) I would not!

@triwarrior
I’ve found my people.
Last year I got some crafty knitted crappy thing. I said, “Oh, you shouldn’t have.” Gift giver demurred. I’m thinking, “No, really, you shouldn’t have. It’s shit

Cheers i just spat out my brew laughing....

@Seniorschoolmum
A couple of xmases ago my then dp bought me a green fluffy wool hedgehog made by his ex-girlfriend i see he is no longer you DP

@Namechangeforthiscancershit

YABVVU Dressing up pets is so fun and the shitter the outfit the better Especially for an Akita, the big "scary/dangerous/aggressive" dogs look hilarious dressed up in something stupid! mine do anyway, and the look even scarier/dangerous/agressive when the fall asleep with something stupid on!

@Namechangeforthiscancershit

possibly but I dont do anything "out there".
the book fold origami thing....why ????? as the poster mention...it just ruins books, if I ever receive one I think id unfold it and pop the book on the shelf as it should be!

however, one gift I do often receive is cookbooks! so because I'm a professional baker I automatically want a cookbook?! WTF!! if I want a specific book I will 1 usually buy it myself or 2 if its close to xmas and hubby/parents/sister ask is there anything I need/want in particular i will say i wouldn't mind this book but its x amount so if its too much just say ill grab it in the sale,

@WhipItGood for goodness bloody sake some of us have a baby fast asleep on our nipple and do NOT need to be bursting out laughing at posts

one gift I do often receive is cookbooks! so because I'm a professional baker I automatically want a cookbook

This is a good point! If someone bought me a tax textbook because it’s my job so I must love it I’d be a bit

Today 09:39
For us it's about getting back to a simpler Christmas, one without tons of plastic packaging and other assorted tat which has been made by a 6 year old in Asia and shipped half way around the world. I'd rather buy some good quality British wool and make a scarf than get one from the high street at the same price.

thats more my idea of Christmas too tbh

I actually have proper mini cake tins for Christmas cake gifts, but years ago when I first started doing it I used baked bean tins (put through the dishwasher first) - people were disappointed the one year I didn't do them!
I've also made sloe gin, spiced apricot chutney, mini Christmas puddings, whisky marmalade, and little boxes with mini squares of chocolate brownies as an add on to a secret Santa. They all went down well!