to think the therapist was a bit judgey?

[Marie0]

Started to see a therapist last week due to my DS1 (he's 13) impulsive and destructive behaviour.

She has met with me and DH already (separately) and met with DS1 today.

As DH collected DS1 at the end of his session they had a bit of chit chat (DH and therapist) and it came up that we are going on holiday on Friday.

She frowned a little and clearly disapproved given DS's bad behaviour - but then quickly changed the subject and said goodbye.

DH is now cross as he felt she was judgemental. He didn't feel the need to justify himself and why indeed should he?

AIBU to think she maybe should have kept her feelings to herself?

If you as a family are not in sync with the current Uk school system, you’re going to have problems.

How many days has he missed so far this term and in the last year?

The therapist is probably reflecting on her own reaction there tbh. It’s not very professional but she’s only human. Her opinion may have got in the way for a minute. Maybe because she was out of the room. I didn’t see anything terrible in her boundaries but some therapists / counsellors are more ‘boundaried’ than others...... 🤷🏻‍♀️

I always take my two of school. You live once and the time you do have is fleeting and never enough. I intend to let the good times roll whenever I can. I hope you have an amazing time and you never know, it might be just what your son needs 🤞🏼💐

Thanks Teddy - I agree completely :)

Oh dear - you seem to be getting a bit of a bashing OP. FWIW, I'd say it was more like surprise that having spoken to you, DS and DH for nearly 5 hours that it hadn't been mentioned!

I'd also say that not taking a child on holiday who's behaviour has resulted in therapy, isn't going to make a blind bit of difference overall. I think the time for punishment/reward has well and truly passed, and alternative strategies (that you seem to be doing) are what's needed.

Enjoy the weekend.

Thanks Userplus, you're absolutely right about it not making a blind bit of difference!

If you’ve chosen to send your DC to school in the U.K. then you should be sticking to the school calendar. You’re basically telling your children that they can pick and choose which aspects of school they bother with. That if they don’t agree with something they don’t have to do it. Which is fine, but then dont take up a school place when you have no intention of following the rules.

IfIWas

I do 'basically stick to the school calendar'. Of course I am not telling my children they can pick and choose anything. This wasn't even a decision that was made with their input.

This decision is nothing to do with anyone other than my family and school. Sometimes rules are not always black and white. Some times a bit of flexibility and holistic approach is needed in one's life.

As I have previously explained, this is not a post about me taking my kids out of school - if you're that interested why not start a thread about why parents do this?

If you want flexibility then don’t send your kids to school! Sending them to school means you have to obey the school rules and adhere to holiday times!

No I think it’s entirely relevant to your thread. I think you’re in denial tbh.

What did he do to get excluded?

I just don't share your opinion - nothing to do with denial.

Many parents send their children to school with every intention of following the rules i.e. correct uniform, homework completed on time, NOT TAKING TIME OFF IN TERM TIME etc.

Guess what? Some children just aren't cut out for school. Some children are like a square peg in a round hole. But rather than make a rash decision to pull their child from school, sensible parents such as myself try and work with the school to find ways forward and work together more effectively and shock horror that may occasionally involve BREAKING the RULES.

Go back to your high horse, my child's mental health is more of a priority than his education right now.

Oh. You’re one of those posters.

sensible parents such as myself...

You’re changing your story now. You said you as a family weren’t in sync with U.K. holidays and you didn’t agree with them. Now you’re saying it’s that it’s because your son isn’t cut out for it that you’re taking a term time holiday for his mental health.

Eh?

Changing my story because I have two different points of view?

Both statements are correct

lama I think I have a crush on you - stop playing hard to get

Make your mind up then.

What did he do to get excluded?

greyhound what a wanky question, you dont use the implication LD's as a below the belt insult, what a disgraceful way to behave

Thank you Staydazzling - I wasn’t sure if it was just me who found the SN inference totally out of order - but reading comments made on many other threads (by her) she seems like a right miserable cow!

Its ok you'll get some goady fuckers on here but lovely people too x

That should say ,,implication of LD's even.