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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to not go to midwife regarding reduced movement? *Poss TW?*

999 replies

booandbumpp · 18/09/2018 07:52

Can someone please tell me what to do? Posting here for traffic.
I am 34 weeks pregnant - complicated pregnancy, baby has a severe CHD called Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome, and will need a surgery in the first week of life.
I also have high pressure in the placenta and am on weekly monitoring for that. Baby is measuring small due to this and I need to be induced early - at 37 weeks - if the pressure stays high, which it has consistently been for the last 5 weeks.
Baby will be borderline "big" enough for the surgery if born at 37 weeks. Can't keep him in longer, can't delay surgery, otherwise he will definitely die. Nothing I can do to help with the pressure in the placenta.
I've had reduced movement yesterday and today. He's never been the most active baby, but yesterday and today I've barely felt him. FMU consultant told me to watch out for this due to the pressure in placenta possibly getting higher and there being no forward flow of blood to baby.
I haven't yet - partly because I'm having two scans tomorrow - one with cardiologist, one with FMU consultants anyway, so I'll get answers then. Partly because I'm selfish - I'm scared, I don't want to miss another day of work, I don't want to drag my partner out of work to sit next to me for 4 hours at a maternity hospital.
And also because honestly what can they do? They induce me now because my placenta won't work properly, he'll still die because he won't be able to have surgery. They leave him in there with negative flow, he'll die, or stop growing.
I'm not crying, I'm barely upset, I'm just stuck. I feel so annoyed at myself for not being able to make a decision, but I guess thats because I feel like no matter what decision I make, its the same outcome.
SO, sorry that was longer than I expected. WWYD?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
Puddingmama2017 · 10/10/2018 11:32

Sending much luck and love your way!

Wait4nothing · 10/10/2018 11:34

Oh I’ve just read this today - had a little cry (especially about your hopes) and I’m so glad you’ve finally been given a time. Sending lots of love your way.

Howmanysleepstilchristmas · 10/10/2018 11:36

Thinking of you and baby! I’ll be checking in to see how things go. Not long now until you get to meet him... Good luck to you both.

PeonyTruffle · 10/10/2018 11:38

All the best OP, hoping that everything goes well x

ShesABelter · 10/10/2018 11:42

Good luck to you and your baby boy, I hope all goes well as it can.

Would a heart transplant when bigger be an option for him?

JLG19 · 10/10/2018 12:05

So glad that you’re going in this afternoon. Wishing you all the luck in the world.

Remember though, induction can be a slow process. Don’t expect too much too quickly!

AromaticSpices · 10/10/2018 12:40

Been following from the sidelines, but wanted to post to say good luck for today. Flowers

IABURQO · 10/10/2018 12:42

Good luck Bear

Observatorycrest · 10/10/2018 12:51

Thinking of you this afternoon...

Egg · 10/10/2018 12:54

Wishing you and your little boy so much luck today and over the next few days. As someone else said, your son is already so loved! Xxx

HaveYouSeentheWritingontheWall · 10/10/2018 12:57

I hope everything goes as smoothly as it can, you have done amazingly well so far and you will be ok, knowing what you do will prepare you and help you face it all. It will be hard but you know that, take all the support that is offered.
Good luck and best wishes to all 3 of you. Flowers for you Bear for your DS and Gin for your DH. X

harriethoyle · 10/10/2018 12:58

Thinking of you and sending all the love and luck Flowers

Kittykat93 · 10/10/2018 13:14

Good luck for this afternoon Thanks

FantasticHarryPotter · 10/10/2018 13:14

Thinking of you.
I hope the induction goes as smoothly as it can.
It seems despite his difficulties he's playing with you being only active when monitored. Smile

Thehop · 10/10/2018 13:16

Good luck x

mummabubs · 10/10/2018 13:20

I've been lurking OP but just wanted to say so glad you've finally got the go ahead to head to the hospital, really hope all goes smoothly and you have your little one with you soon! Xx

DeadButDelicious · 10/10/2018 13:43

Good luck. Thanks

Thisimmortalcurl · 10/10/2018 13:45

Lots of luck Flowers

Eatmycheese · 10/10/2018 13:45

Thinking of you 💐

Loopylou6 · 10/10/2018 13:46

Sending you strength x

FilledSoda · 10/10/2018 14:03

Thinking of you x

dizzycatdance2 · 10/10/2018 14:20

Hope you are on your way , and no more delays

chickenloverwoman · 10/10/2018 14:23

Hope you are on your way, or actually at the hospital.Wishing you luck Flowers

crispysausagerolls · 10/10/2018 15:42

Thinking of you OP xx

booandbumpp · 10/10/2018 15:50

I am in the hospital! The amount of bags we've brought (me, DP, and my mum) it looks like we're going for a holiday. It's going to be a lot of waiting - I'm pretty nervous for the birth and I think that's where I'm focusing at the moment. But I'm hoping he'll be here by Saturday xx

OP posts: