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Paid wrong person via PayPal. Help!

168 replies

NewNameDueToMyIdiocy · 14/09/2018 17:38

Please be kind, I feel like a total idiot right now. Name changed because I am embarrassed and worried.

I sent some money via PayPal "Friends and Family" recently and inadvertently sent it to the wrong person (a total stranger!). It was not a small amount of money (hundreds) and I am now very worried at the possibility of not getting it back.

PayPal won't / can't help because I used F&F. I am obviously not expecting them to cover me, as I forfeited that right by using F&F, but they won't even request a refund on my behalf or anything. There is no option for me to do this myself via my account. The only dispute option open to me isn't applicable to the situation and when I raised a dispute it was closed almost immediately.

I have been in contact with the incorrect recipient via email and while they have replied to me, they haven't made it clear at all if they plan to return the money. I can understand that they might be worried about a scam or similar, but I'm really hoping I can convince them I am genuine.

AIBU to hope that they will return my money? Is there anything I can do if they don't? Has anyone ever been in this position? Help Mumsnet.

OP posts:
CupMug · 14/10/2018 17:56

Phew! What a great update. 💥💥💥

HelloSnow · 14/10/2018 17:59

Is that PayPal fees to refund? Because friends and family doesn't normally have fees (which is why you've had so much trouble getting it back!)

BishyBarneyBee3 · 14/10/2018 18:05

Great news op!

Puzzledandpissedoff · 14/10/2018 18:05

Is that PayPal fees to refund? Because friends and family doesn't normally have fees

You're right of course, but given how long it's taken them to repay OP I somehow doubt they'll hand over any more

Maybe they regard it as an "inconvenience fee", but anyway I'd honestly say this is one to suck up

MirandaWest · 14/10/2018 18:09

Am so glad you’ve got the money back Smile

NewNameDueToMyIdiocy · 14/10/2018 18:09

I believe they (understandably!!) paid me back via Goods and Services, so that's why the PayPal fee. I really don't mind at all, I can 100% understand them wanting to cover their back, and I was actually going to suggest that they used Goods and Services to return the money, so they had protection. I presume they didn't click refund, but send it as a new payment IYSWIM? It's a very small price to pay for getting the vast, vast majority of the money back.

Thank you again everyone!

OP posts:
HelloSnow · 14/10/2018 18:15

Ah right I see. That makes sense and was wise of them.

I was thinking more it was a bit cheeky if PayPal charged a friends and family refund fee when you weren't protected and they didn't help at all!

Sunflowersforever · 14/10/2018 19:40

Oh, so happy for you. Good to know.

SistersOfPercy · 14/10/2018 19:48

I don't wish to put a dampener on your update, but I'd be rather worried by a Goods & Services payment rather than a straight refund of the initial payment. It could very possibly be recalled by them via dispute for something like 180 days.

I'm sure someone with more Paypal knowledge than me can tell you more about it.

PanchoBarnes · 15/10/2018 00:13

Soooo very glad you got it back.
Yes, think of the Paypal fee as a type of tuition for 'schooling' Smile
And crikey, don't be concerned about a possible future claim back --
I doubt it would be worth the other person's bother. And it wouldn't be valid anyway.

Have you sent the person a plant or somesuch token for his/her trouble?

fifithefoof · 15/10/2018 10:51

Send them a plant for their trouble?!

I'd send them a fucking cactus.

SistersOfPercy · 15/10/2018 11:33

And crikey, don't be concerned about a possible future claim back --
I doubt it would be worth the other person's bother. And it wouldn't be valid anyway.

Person has paid OP 'goods and services'. Whats stopping the person claiming they purchased something and OP hasn't't sent it?

I'm going to tag @19lottie82 in this as she's the PayPal expert and might be able to shed more light on this.

And a fucking plant? 😂

PanchoBarnes · 15/10/2018 12:47

@fifi snort @ cactus Grin

@Sisters
I was just thinking the other person is probably just a normal person, and is finished with it. It's possible that they might try something - but what will they claim? There was no invoice from OP, or promise of goods.
OP seems to think it was sent by G&S for protection. I think it might be possible it was because the refund button was no longer an option.
I'm not sure how long the refund stays available. It's been a while since I've used Paypal, but I recall a couple of times, the refund button disappeared, without me doing anything.

OK, yes, I'm a dork and sent a plant to someone, when I did somethig similar as OP did. But then, the other person was rather pleasant, and we had a couple of nice conversations.
I probably wouldn't send one if he/she was a fuckface, though.

Now you and fifi have got me laughing about the plant suggestion, and I knew damned well I was going to get bashed for it! Smile

SistersOfPercy · 15/10/2018 13:13

Pancho there doesn't have to be an invoice. People buy from other platforms like Facebook all the time and receive payment without invoices.

I bought something from FB Marketplace last month and paid G&S, it wasn't as described and I filed a claim which I won. I hadn't had an invoice from the seller, I had simply paid via the email address they provided.

In theory the person now has 180 days to file a claim for an item not received. Paypal is very black and white, you can either prove delivery on the back of a payment or you can't. They don't listen to reason or to claims they were just paying you back.

The only way I can think that might get around this is for OP to now send a letter via trackable means thanking them for the payment. If it does all go tits up in two months time they can at least prove a delivery to the address.

NewNameDueToMyIdiocy · 15/10/2018 13:38

I'm not massively concerned about the G&S thing, as they do seem like a genuine person, if a little grumpy (although some would obviously say with good reason).

However, mainly out of interest, how would I tell if the payment was definitely made by G&S vs F&F - do they look any different?

I've made the assumption that they used G&S because they have sent less than the original amount back. They stated that the amount was a few pence short (due to accidentally dipping into the funds in their PP account) but actually the amount is a few pounds short, so I had just assumed that meant they'd used G&S. I may be wrong though!

OP posts:
NewNameDueToMyIdiocy · 15/10/2018 13:40

Regarding the plant, no, I don't think I'll be sending them anything (horticultural or otherwise). I've obviously thanked them for returning it, but that's as far as I'm going to go. I don't actually have their postal address anyway, and the interaction we've had hasn't left me thinking they'd appreciate such a gesture TBH.

OP posts:
PanchoBarnes · 15/10/2018 14:46

Yeah, I'm starting to remember now, one of the reasons I haven't used PP in a long time is because it started becoming less convenient and more problematic.
I think I see what you're saying - if they put in a claim, OP's account would automatically be docked, even before anything is proven or investigated?
That pretty much sucks.
Well, not everyone is a thieving opportunist, so I hope it really is all over and done with for OP.
OP -- you'll have to come back and update us in 180 days!

NewNameDueToMyIdiocy · 15/10/2018 14:50

@PanchoBarnes this is going to be the thread that never ends. I'll put in a calendar reminder for 180 days time! Grin

OP posts:
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