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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Mother and baby parking

461 replies

crispysausagerolls · 10/09/2018 14:33

Went to the supermarket today with my baby and really could’ve used the mother and baby space to get my car seat in and out etc (especially hard as I have a 2 door car). Just as I arrived a woman without a baby pulled into the mother and baby spot, without a baby. My mother asked her what she was doing and she said she was waiting for a child. 2 mins later a middle aged woman came out of the supermarket and got into the car and she started to drive off. So she had lied. I said thanks to her in a sarcastic way as i was struggling to get my baby out in a tight space (very passive aggressive of me I know but DS hates the car and had been screaming and I was so irritated by not having the space) and she started spouting off about being heavily pregnant and blah blah blah. Which was all completely irrevelant (if even true) because she didn’t get out of the bloody car anyway!

AIBU to think the mother and baby space isn’t somewhere to just wait for a mate to come and join you in the car? People genuinely need the extra space provided by them!

OP posts:
Sirzy · 10/09/2018 15:47

Can I suggest you just focus on you and not worry about other people and their parking! If a space is free use it, if it isn’t don’t.

Sirzy · 10/09/2018 15:47

And if I can lift an 8 year old into the car in a normal space (if all disabled spaces are full) then I am sure you can manage a baby!

GertrudeCB · 10/09/2018 15:49

I'll swap your pregnancy for my disability ,. That ok? Angry

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 10/09/2018 15:49

She drove off whilst we were parked and DS was out of the car seat so no point by then

So a big old fuss about nothing.

BackforGood · 10/09/2018 15:50

You mean the information you posted after I posted my response ? Hmm

Original poster
crispysausagerolls · 10/09/2018 15:51

GertrudeCB

Please read the post - I’m not pregnant.

Also to sirzy why does everything have to end up being “if i can manage x you can manage y” - I’m allowed to be irritated by something which is trivial to someone else. Of course your situation is more difficult, but that doesn’t mean I can’t have a moan!

OP posts:
Sirzy · 10/09/2018 15:52

Perhaps though sometimes you need to learn to take a step back, reconsider and realise actually things don’t need to be as bad as you think they are!

Original poster
crispysausagerolls · 10/09/2018 15:53

So a big old fuss about nothing.

Not really a fuss, no. I was wound up by something that, according to this thread, has annoyed many a parent before me and I’m sure will annoy many a parent again! Just wanted a vent really and feeling much better after reading the responses (and having eaten half a packet of biscuits) ☺️

OP posts:
ChaosTrulyReigns · 10/09/2018 15:58

You've stated that it's a tiny car. Park off centre in any space, should all be fine, non?

BasicUsername · 10/09/2018 16:04

It's ridiculous how many people on here think that it's acceptable to park in P&C spaces without a child.

It's fucking selfish and rude.

I wouldn't say anything or mind if it was someone elderly, heavily pregnant, or with obvious mobility issues.

However, I think you were entirely right to call her out in this instance.

I'd be very happy to have the P&C spaces located further from the shop, provided that there was a safe walkway to them (not easy to push a full trolley and hold a toddlers hand to stop them running out in to the path of cars).

Spikeyball · 10/09/2018 16:07

It is pointless confronting people in this situation.
Either a) they don't care and may give you a mouthful or b) they have a good reason
( which they don't have to share with you) and you have made their day harder and they may give you a mouthful

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 10/09/2018 16:09

Really pisses me off- getting a baby/toddler in and out of a car seat without the door of the car hitting the car next to it in a regular space is difficult. Selfish Bastards

Spikeyball · 10/09/2018 16:09

If someone questioned me they would be told to go away because they have no right to ask me why I am there.

Original poster
crispysausagerolls · 10/09/2018 16:14

spikeyball

If I parked in a parent and child space with no child I would be very happy for someone to question me.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 10/09/2018 16:15

But what right have you got to question anyone? You have no idea what is going on in their world, how much pain they may be in, how much of a battle getting out the door may have been.

Really it is highly arrogant to think it’s anything to do with you!

user1472651064 · 10/09/2018 16:17

You should always confront people in this situation. However much they may act like they have the right, they don't, unless they a baby/toddler. It's a binary thing, do they have a toddler, yes/no? If no then they have no right to park there. If people just let the scum of this world do as they please without passing comment, then they will carry on doing as they please. If everytime you park selfishly someone raises it with you, you'll certainly get fed up of the attention.

BasicUsername · 10/09/2018 16:19

@Sirzy

"It is highly arrogant to think it's anything to do with you"

-it has a direct negative impact on OP when she struggles to get her child out of the car in a normal space, thanks to a selfish cow picking up her friend.

-it has a direct negative impact of the car next to OPs, which probably got a minor scratch / scuff / scrape, as she had to open the car door wide enough to get the baby out.

Sirzy · 10/09/2018 16:20

Or you will make someone who already struggles to leave the house even less likely to do so.

If you want to control peoples parking get a job as a parking warden. Otherwise learn to mind your own business!

user1472651064 · 10/09/2018 16:21

Sirzy, every right, you seem to be missing the point (fairly sure on purpose). Unless you have a baby/toddler, then you're not allowed to park there. There's very little ambiguity there.

Original poster
crispysausagerolls · 10/09/2018 16:22

user1472651064

I agree with you. We all hve to coexist in this world, and wouldn’t it be nice if people adhered to simple rules that are there to make life easier? Like not parking in designated spaces you aren’t supposed to park in, or not sitting in the seats on public transport which are for the pregnant or elderly/infirm. I think it’s very arrogant to do things you aren’t entitled to. Seems quite obvious to me that I had a baby with me and was a supermarket customer and had a right to park there, whereas she did not even leave her car and did not have a child and did not have the right to. But that’s just me 🤷🏻‍♀️

OP posts:
Sirzy · 10/09/2018 16:23

Actually people who are disabled are allowed to park there and contrary to popular belief they don’t have this stamped on their head.

Some people need to remember these spaces are simply a marketing ploy. It is worrying the sense of helplessness they foster amongst some parents though!

Lydiaatthebarre · 10/09/2018 16:23

User

Disabled people can use p&t spaces if the disabled spaces are all taken.

Original poster
crispysausagerolls · 10/09/2018 16:24

There were two empty disabled spaces right next to the parent and child space. Otherwise I would not have asked her.

OP posts:
Spikeyball · 10/09/2018 16:24

Questioning me has a direct negative impact on my son who may have a violent meltdown about it.

Sirzy · 10/09/2018 16:25

Not all disabled people are entitled to a blue badge due to the rediculous hoops you have to jump through. It doesn’t mean they don’t need the space though.