Re putting children on your lap on public transport

[user1485342611]

Someone in work this morning was saying that she had to stand the whole way in on the bus while at least three adults with toddlers allowed those toddler to take up a whole seat. We were all agreeing that they should have put the toddlers on their laps to free up 3 seats during rush hour. Apart from one colleague who has a 4 year old and didn't see why he should be denied a seat or she should have to put up with feeling 'a bit squashed' just so someone else could have the seat.

When I was a child it was just the norm for kids under a certain age to be pulled onto their mother's lap when the bus started filling up. No one thought twice about it.

AIBU to think it's a shame that parents don't do this anymore and that my colleague is being a bit selfish?

@Timeisslippingaway Spot on!

Seriously Lottie I'm not getting into silly pedantic rows with you.

If you have a comment to make on the issue under discussion fine.

But if you just want to be rude and argumentative for the sake of it, I'm not interested.

@howabout - look at the comments on that stupid article and you'll see people think it's a crock of shit they've written.

@misslingoss @longwayoff

Keep breeding those entitled kids, they'll be choosing your care home eventually.

Or they'll grow into teenagers like the schoolgirls I once saw, who occupied the priority seats when there were elderly people with walking sticks, and one with a white stick, standing.

I have also seen people aged 35-50 doing this too. (Hogging priority seats whilst the elderly and visually-impaired have to stand.) It's not just kids and teenagers who do this.

Thing is, the so-called 'mature adults' should know better.

I would stand up so a child could sit. Who wouldn’t?

I wouldn't. I spent my childhood, school days and young adulthood giving up my seat to older people. Now I'm older, I'm supposed to give up my seat to a child? When do I get to be the one who gets a seat?

We don't often go on public transport, but when we do if it's busy I would put my kids (4 and 2) on the seat, and stand next to them to make sure they don't launch themselves out. My 2 year old can be a screaming octopus if you try and hold him on your knee, which isn't fun for anyone, and I'm much more capable of standing on the bus than either of the kids.

Yeah I probably would let my child sit whilst I stood next to them.

I don't get the whole respect for people because they are older. There are twats of all ages and the WW2 generation have mostly died off.

I think this depends of lots of different things, including what age the DC is and what I am wearing, dressed in jeans for a casual morning fine. Going into work and nursery, formal clothes and thin tights then I'm not going to want a DC squirming all over me. On a crowded bus or tube I definitely wouldn't want them standing, they would get super squashed and pushed about.

As a child my mother always put me on her knee or I stood when a little older (I always liked standing, it was exciting!) it was just simply good manners and respect.
I bring my child up the same way, he could very easily sit on my lap and when he’s too big will be big enough to stand. If there was a reason he couldn’t stand I’d give up my seat for him.

Agree OP totally.

If I am by myself I Would always stand so a young DC could have a seat, I agree who wouldn't?

I think if there's no physical reason not to, it's common courtesy to put a toddler on the lap to let someone else sit down.

Under 5’s I would pop on my lap, over 5’s are paid for so I wouldn’t unless an elderly person got on and there were no other spaces that could be given up.
I don’t make my children(7 and under) stand either because the roads on our bus journey are twisty and bumpy and I don’t think standing would be safe for them.

Im finding it hard to believe the a

When my daughter was younger she would have a meltdown if I tried to put her on my lap. I think that everyone on the bus/train would prefer for her to have a seat and be quiet, rather than yell the place down!

@Creeper8 the a???

Creeper the suspense is killing me

I was brought up to stand if another adult didn’t have a seat. Young kids definitely on laps. Older kids can stand up. Just courtesy.

i have two sons now 18 and 20 years old.When they were younger and travelling with me they were made to get up when elderly folk came on or sit on my lap to make space .they still do it now as young adults and often are exasperated at the lack of consideration amongst commuters on the underground where we live.My son was so annoyed last week when a mum with a pushchair was not let out in time for her stop just because people would just not move out of the way.Its this lack of consideration that makes travelling on public transport so unenjoyable at times

I can't believe some here would sit happy while watching a little kid stand on a bus, how bloody weird! How would you feel if they fell over and hurt themselves?

I've always got up to allow a Mum and child to sit down, surely that makes more sense than a 30 year old sitting while a six year old wobbles around?

YY, I also stand up for small children/their parents if I can. A small child shouldn't be standing on any moving transport. I would put my small toddler on my lap, but I guess there are good reasons when people don't. I'd be amazed if the entire passenger quotient was made up exclusively of the elderly and toddlers, though - there's usually at least the odd person who can stand easily, without getting into comparative difficulty/deservingness debates.

When children are 10+ I think they are fine to stand but when they are little I wouldn’t sit while they stood. I am an able bodied adult, a child is smaller and weaker than me and so more likely to fall and be hurt, why do I deserve a seat more than them just because I am older?

Sorry posted to soon, I find it hard to believe the amount of people claiming they sit school age children on their laps since ive literally never seen it.

My 4 year old fell flat on his back on a moving bus and eve ryone gasped but not one person asked if he was ok (including the driver) or offered a seat, I would never give up his seat for a self ish adult!

YABU. Sick of all this bitterness over a fucking seat and banging on about its being manners and entitlement and blah blah blah. Get a life.

I don't think its always about respect but about teaching kids how to be considerate of other people. The same as always saying thank you to people who are helpful/kind/considerate when I'm with kids, I want them to take notice and for people to know that I appreciate it.
I have turned into my mother though and am now one of those women who thanks children for using such beautiful manners in public