AIBU - free school meals application against my wishes.

[GlitterSand]

Two years ago I became eligible to claim free school meals,
I do not need the assistance so declined the offer.
The local council sent me a silly amount of letters about being entitled to claim, I phoned them and asked them to stop, explained that I didn't need to claim and asked them to make a note on my 'file' not to contact me again.
However, within a few months it started again I ignored them until I received a letter that basically said 'you are entitled to claim this so we are going to put in a claim on your behalf'
This annoyed me and I sent them a letter telling them that I do not give them permission to ever make a claim for FSMs on my behalf, that I wanted it marked on my file that I never want a claim for FSMs to be made in my name.
Someone from the council called me and apologised he said he made a note on my file and I would not be contacted again.

My DC has just started secondary school and for the second day in a row, his student account was not charged for the meal he had.
I just called the school and they have told me that his account has not been charged because he is in receipt of FSM, I told her this is a mistake and she is going to look into it and call me back.

I'm currently on hold to the council.

I'm so angry, how dare they put in a claim without my knowledge or permission and against my explicit request not to.
AIBU to be so annoyed?

I'm just posting to vent really, to try to calm down before I speak to anyone, but I'm just so angry that they can go against my wishes and put in a claim for a benefit that I do not want.

You could always put the money you would have given for their lunches into a savings account for them. Over the next 5 years that will add up. Isn’t that amazing? A small fund for uni, or for a car, or for a training course for them? Absolutely take what you’re entitled to.

I don't want to claim it because we don't need it, I know that on paper it will look like we may benefit from it but I receive a generous amount of maintenance from my ex-husband so I don't want to claim for free school meals that we don't need.

I don't want to take money out of a system that is already struggling and could go to supporting another family that actually need it.

Could you explain why you’re so against it? Clearly it doesn’t affect what your son gets or how he gets it, it’s just not charged for? I genuinely don’t understand this.

You’re not doing someone else out of it, pupils are either eligible or they’re not.

Glitter, if you don't allow the school to get the PP funding it won't go to another struggling family. It just stays where it is. Help the bloody school for goodness sake, we all know how difficult funding is becoming for them.

my Husband is a peripatetic music teacher. They put it under remission of fees. He works over a couple of different counties so worth investigating.

When I was at school it was pretty obvious who was getting FSM as the teacher handed out lunch tickets to them every morning. Never thought about it until now.

However if your son is eating the same lunch and he has a electronic account (so it’ll remain private), why on earth wouldn’t you claim for them?!

This seems such a silly thing to be annoyed about.. as others have said, you're also denying money to the school. I'm sure there's plenty of parents who are just above the threshold that would really welcome that relief in paying for school meals.

Why not set aside the same amount of money each week for your DS to use on something else that will benefit his education? It must rack up over the years.

I don't want to take money out of a system that is already struggling and could go to supporting another family that actually need it.

It will support others who need it through the Pupil Premium payment your son's school will get.

If you don't want the meals send him in with a packed lunch.

Eemamc I've checked this. There are companies and individuals who offer music lessons to schools, and funding this from PP can be a good use of the money for some children. But the school decides what their priorities are, it's not something parents should assume they can all access if they are eligible for the funding.

Are you missing the point about how it benefits the school?

Lots of primary schools have really struggled since the introduction of the universal fsm for ks1 because parents simply aren’t letting them know they are entitled so they miss out on money!

I don't want to take money out of a system that is already struggling and could go to supporting another family that actually need it.

Make a donation to, say, a local food bank equal to the amount of the meals.

I don't understand how you could be entitled to FSM and not need it, The costs of school meals would actually cripple us and they say we aren't entitled so my children have to have packed lunch a cheap as I can make it because I couldn't afford to pay the money for the school meals.

You are being unreasonable to deny the school the extra funding that they would get from the claim.

But don't you see that although your son would get free school meals, other children will also benefit because the school receives extra funding for having a child claiming free school meals.
Use the money that you'd save by putting it into a savings account for your son if it bothers you that much? Or donate some money to the school or donate money for a child to go on a school trip.

If you don't want the free school meals, then arrange to pay the school back as a donation. That way you pay what you are willing/ able to, and they still benefit from the PP funding.

This exactly. Your stance on this is very strange, OP.

But the pupil premium is there to aid children from poor households. If the op is independently wealthy then that does not reflect the situation of her child. The op does not OWE the school anything - ffs.

“I don't want to take money out of a system that is already struggling“

But you are. That system is the one that provides your child’s education.

A school I help in have funded a Reading Recovery teacher from PP money. I'm sure some here will know how improving reading can help with all other subjects... It's working brilliantly and many pupils benefit.

I know schools try so hard to make parents understand the financial benefits for schools if parents take the time to register, and that they don't have to take the meals, it's depressing that anyone can still not get it.

So the op should apply for the pupil premium so that the school can take advantage of a loop hole?

I don't want to take money out of a system that is already struggling

That is exactly what you are doing by not claiming FSM.

Regardless of how it might benefit the school YANBU about being upset about the school taking action that you haven’t authorised.

You attitude is very selfish, you are denying the school of a substantial amount of money that it's entitled to.

Schools struggle to make ends meet and people like you make it even harder for them. You don't have to actually eat the free meals, it's a mechanism to get more funding to school

It's not a fucking loophole, it's a legitimate source of funding. Government wanted to put funding in for "disadvantaged" children. It was hard to work out how to identify the need without means testing. They came up with this scheme so that they could attempt to give the money out in some sort of reasonable way.

How did the school apply for you? Don't you have to sign a form?

Just accept it, so the school can get the extra £900. Then donate the money you'd spend on his lunch, gift aided if possible to a charity who support struggling families