AIBU to be shocked that the NSPCC cancelled their Facebook Live session with Mumsnetters, because they didn't like the questions? That they can't explain why they aren't putting children in danger?

[loveyouradvice]

I am reeling from this - Mumsnet promoted a Facebook Live for Thursday 12.30... to talk about keeping Kids safe from Abuse, and to publicise their PANTS and SpeakOut StaySafe campaigns.

NSPCC just didn't turn up - and only 4 hours later published a brief statement that said nothing!!!! So lots of people waiting for a no show.

It is fine for them to have the policies they have - IF THEY CAN EXPLAIN that they really are in all children's best interests and that they aren't putting girls at risk..... They haven't even tried to do that... Just ignored us and run. Ignored MUMSNET - which is full of people who raise or give money to the NSPCC, and who use it.

HOW??? I am bewildered beyond words.....

Oh ... and hopefully clicky link here of the questions Mumsnetters asked - really thoughtful cogent ones!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_facebook_live/a3343961-Facebook-Live-about-talking-to-kids-about-staying-safe-from-abuse-with-NSPCC

Let me finish that sentence for you Datun. They are not explained or evidenced to YOUR satisfaction.

Nope. They were completely ignored. As you, yourself, keep telling us.

Fantastic advice there. While you're being raped/ogled/wanked at/harassed you can be saying 'Ah! My spider senses have detected a problem with this man in this changing room!' Problem solved.

I am guessing that Rat is one of the cool wives that thinks men passing around photos, taken from a private facebook page, of her straight after a c-section, is a compliment?

What is male pattern abuse then?

Precisely.

Thanks for the reply Rat but in 60 years I've never heard of or seen any woman up to no good in the ladies. Do you expect this to continue if things do change?

Precisely

So you can't say. How unexpected.

I am guessing that Rat is one of the cool wives that thinks men passing around photos, taken from a private facebook page, of her straight after a c-section, is a compliment?

I've actually had someone prosecuted for voyeurism against me sooooo.... you'd be really quite offensively wrong.

i've actually had someone prosecuted for voyeurism against me sooooo.... you'd be really quite offensively wrong.

But because it isn't you it's fine?

I've actually had someone prosecuted for voyeurism against me sooooo.... you'd be really quite offensively wrong.

Were they male or female?

Thanks for the reply Rat but in 60 years I've never heard of or seen any woman up to no good in the ladies. Do you expect this to continue if things do change?

Do you think that means it never happens? FWIW there was a thread aaaages back about changing rooms where both me and a couple of other posters had experienced sexually aggressive behavior from women - myself as a teenager. We were told we were lying. That was nice.

And as it happens, I've never seen anyone up to no good in a unisex loo either.

tillytop I think if things carried on the way they are with trans women using the ladies loos just as they do now and just as they would continue to do if the GRA process were simplified, you could just as easily go through another 60 years never seeing a woman up to no good in the loos.

But because it isn't you it's fine?

OFFENSIVE. Some fucking feminist you are.

Do you mind telling me where I said it was fine? Or are you pissed off because I would rather have liked Stella Creasey's thread to be about tackling misogyny and not about some hateful troll posting an intimate photograph? And by the looks of the MN deletion message, it wasn't that particular troll who got the whole thing shut down.

Although of course you'll tell me MN were lying, right?

You said it wasn't male pattern behaviour...just trying to work out your angle on the harassment.

What is your thoughts on it bearing in mind you don't think it is male pattern abuse?

Oh come on. I've seriously never seen anyone sea lion quite that much. At least a year of this and you're trotting out women as aggressors?! At least try

So you can't say. How unexpected.

This is very petty, but really I'm having fun.

You might first want to learn the meaning of the word abuse if you want to call yourself a feminist, because bandying it around to describe "trying to get someone on the internet to call them a woman by typing words with their keyboard" and "telling someone they don't look great after a c-section" are really very far down on the scale. If that's what you call "male pattern abuse" you might want to round up half the women on AIBU for the latter. Don't you think you're cheapening the word?

I'd have likes some answers or my mind put to rest. I read the NSPCC questions and thought most very good.

I care about safeguarding as I have three kids and rapidly aging relatives who's wellbeing I care passionately about. Everyone I've spoken to in RL see's massive and obvious safeguarding issues around self – ID.

Being able to ask questions is how most of us learn about topics - getting answers we understand and can make sense of is vital part of that. So NSPCC lack of engagement isn't great IMO.

Though I'm not sure what's gone on with the street harrisment threads - that's something with a 13 year old DD I really would like stamped out or curtailed or at least start to have a cultural shift against.

At least a year of this and you're trotting out women as aggressors?!

Oh I see. Only other women's personal experiences count for anything then, right? Only the women whose experiences align with your agenda?

Anecdotes are not data. They're not representative of a class. But you know I'm not dumb enough to think that. But I am allowed my personal experiences. And my opinions. So I'll keep barking them as long as you keep throwing me fish. Or would you rather silence women like me?

This is very petty, but really I'm having fun.

So you weren't there, but now that you know a man stole a woman's post partum photo from a private facebook page, made it into an abusive meme, shared it on the internet, and then came in here trying to force women to say that if another man upskirted them it would also be a hate crime; which they didn't - and you think it is all fun?

Has anyone got a good fish recipe?

So you weren't there, but now that you know a man stole a woman's post partum photo from a private facebook page, made it into an abusive meme, shared it on the internet, and then came in here trying to force women to say that if another man upskirted them it would also be a hate crime; which they didn't - and you think it is all fun?

Rewind. A thread about tackling street harassment and misogyny was deleted, according to MN, because a load of posters mobbed it with question about the GRA.

Your banging on about some offensive woman-hating little troll on it is classic BLATANT deflection.

Stop it.

Betty, darling, I'm a vegetarian.

“telling someone they don't look great after a c-section” oh come on, that’s not what they are saying and you know it, don’t be so fucking disingenuous. if a radfem had posted a photo of a TRA and said they looked a state you’d be calling them abusive.

Anecdotes are not data. They're not representative of a class. But you know I'm not dumb enough to think that. But I am allowed my personal experiences. And my opinions. So I'll keep barking them as long as you keep throwing me fish. Or would you rather silence women like me?

You can't post something clearly designed to show women as just as bad as men when you know that not to be the case and then yap about how you know it's not the case but you're being silenced when someone points out that it's not the case.

Or rather you can but it makes you look disingenuous at best.

But then you are disingenuous at best aren't you? So actually crack on.

I only have one question for nspcc - I didn't ask on the thread actually as I was going to do so during the fb live chat (side note; when nspcc weren't even on the thread and most posts there were after they no-showed, how can it be considered "derailed"??)

Anywho, happy for anyone to answer it, if they have an answer...?

Advice such as that given by allsorts and similar charities (I'm sure r0wan will have a link ) states that if a child discloses they are trans, people in authority must keep it a secret unless there is an immediate risk. How can that be squared with the advice that adults should not keep secrets for children, and that there is a link between offending and "our little secret". As some here are very keen to point out as if we are unaware? - abusers often hold positions of authority (when they are not family or friends).

What does the nspcc have to say about the allsorts advice? Do they agree that it directly opposes their own safeguarding advice? How can they advise schools on "speak out, stay safe" without mentioning it, either agreeing with or contradicting the advice that the teachers have had from other organisations?

How is this circle being squared?

“telling someone they don't look great after a c-section” oh come on, that’s not what they are saying and you know it, don’t be so fucking disingenuous.

Um, actually, that IS what they're saying. That's exactly what they said. What embellishment are you supposing I should have fantasised?

if a radfem had posted a photo of a TRA and said they looked a state you’d be calling them abusive.

We clearly don't know one-another well. I would not have said it was abusive.

Nasty, petty, unpleasant bullying? Yes. I may well have said that. I will say exactly the same about whatever the hell went on on that thread. But abusive? No.

No where were we on the subject of street harassment and misogyny? Oh yeah, I remember, the thread was shut down because of a load of single-issue activists hijacking it.

If that isn't male pattern abuse I don't know what is.

Quite.