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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask ladies with brothers

159 replies

HaveSomeGrace · 01/09/2018 22:19

What kind of relationships do you have with your brothers? Did you ever want a sister? How many of you are there? Are you the youngest, eldest etc?

My daughter is 1 of 5 but no sisters. I wondered what it might be like for her as she grows as I won’t be able to give her a sister, ever.

OP posts:
lrh3891 · 01/09/2018 22:55

I have two brothers, we are very close and I never missed having a sister. Though I did find it difficult to relate to other girls growing up and tended to hang out with my brothers and their mates more

Kahlua4me · 01/09/2018 22:55

I am really close to my brother and speak to him most days. He is the one I would ring to share any news, good or bad. We are closer than ever now since our mum died suddenly a few years ago, as our dad died when we were young and stepfather a few y ars before our mum.

I have never thought about having a sister, never yearned for one as happy with db, but have one now in my sister in law as she is great and we are also close.

I think your dd will love having brothers and won’t notice not having a sister 😊

Kahlua4me · 01/09/2018 22:57

Sorry you didn’t need all that info about my parents 😟

PlatypusPie · 01/09/2018 22:58

Just one brother and I occasionally thought it might have been nice to have another sibling of either sex because there was quite a big gap in age. The gap stopped mattering at all once we were grown up, though and have had a great relationship with him all my life - very kind, good career advice etc. and we share a very particular kind of humour.

( My male family relationships ( grandfather , father and brother ) were all very good and supportive which may have given me unrealistic expectations of male partners - or maybe just high standards by which to judge, which is a good thing , IMO)

Funnybunnyfluff · 01/09/2018 23:02

I have a younger brother 18 month age gap. I am so glad I had a brother would not have wanted a sister.
We get on very well and have great fun together 30 years on.

No sisters required Smile

Clevs · 01/09/2018 23:04

I'm the youngest of three, I have two older brothers. There is 5 years between me and the middle child and 6 years between the middle and oldest. I'm closer to the older brother. Never really got on with the middle one as we were growing up, but are closer and get on fine now but still have more in common and have a similar personality to the older one.

I never really missed having a sister as I have a female cousin quite close in age and spent my entire childhood with her and we are very close, so she is like the sister I never had.

HamishsMomma · 01/09/2018 23:05

Hi OP I have 3 older brothers and never wanted a sister - I like being the youngest and yes I did get bossed about but I am close to all of them even though we all live miles apart and eldest in another continent! I was never very girly growing up which may have helped or shaped me I don't know - still meant never awkward around boys!

n0ne · 01/09/2018 23:07

I'm closer to my brother than my sister and played with him much more as a kid. Sister is 4 years older, I'm middle child, brother is 3 years younger. In my experience, sex/gender has little to do with how you get on with your siblings.

Maelstrop · 01/09/2018 23:08

Younger sister to a brother here. He was abusive growing up. We barely speak now, most communication is through Facebook. His wife is lovely. His past behaviour still angers me.

EllenJanesthickerknickers · 01/09/2018 23:13

I've got an older sister and brother. I get on much better with my brother. My sister has 2 girls, close in age, but they really never got on as children. Slightly better as adults. My brother has a girl and a boy. Close as anything, really good mates. My 3 boys argued a lot in their young teens but are getting closer again now they are getting older.

Mummylin · 01/09/2018 23:13

I have 3 brothers and we are all very close. I also had two sisters, one that died at 26 and I still have another sister and we are not that close at all, we can go for weeks without being in touch, whereas I meet up with all my brothers for a meal every single week. I wouldn't be without them.

BrazzleDazzleDay · 01/09/2018 23:18

Im the middle child to two brothers, never wanted or needed a sister. Interestingly ive always preferred male friends.

I would do anything for my brothers, particularly the younger one. Im fiercely protective of him and him me. Infact i was just telling my dd last night of when a boy seriously injured him as a child, over 20 years ago now the anger i feel is unreal.

We dont get to see each other very often these days with work/dc/distance unfortunately but i/they know that if needed the others would be there in a heartbeat.

lifechangesforever · 01/09/2018 23:21

I have 3 brothers - one older and two younger. I have never once wanted a sister, not even when I was younger.

I have great relationships with 2 of them now, especially with the one that's younger than me but closest in age, we always confide in each other and have extremely similar sense of humours. I have a strained relationship with my youngest brother but it's because of who he is and how he conducts himself, nothing to do with the fact he's male.

You're daughter will be fine, she will love being the only girl and hopefully she'll have lovely relationships with them.

Whipsmart · 01/09/2018 23:21

I have a lovely older brother... there's 4 years between us but we've always got on well. It's literally never occurred to me to hanker after having a sister! But then I am close with my mum and a handful of female friends so I suppose I get that sisterly closeness elsewhere Smile

PickAChew · 01/09/2018 23:23

I have a brother. Somewhere. Can't remember when we last spoke.

opinionatedfreak · 01/09/2018 23:24

I have a brother and a sister. I have a good relationship with them both.

My brother and I speak most days on the way home from our respective jobs 18:00 driving home on Bluetooth is our chat time.

lifechangesforever · 01/09/2018 23:24

*YOUR not you're!

How embarrassing..

thegardenfairy · 01/09/2018 23:25

There are 5 of us

  1. Sister
  2. Me
  3. Brother
  4. Sister
  5. Brother

I have a much better relationship with my brother who is a year younger than me. My next best relationship is with my younger brother. I absolutely hate my eldest sister. Not too fussed on my younger sister either.

So to answer your question my best sibling relationships are with my brothers.

Aria2015 · 01/09/2018 23:25

I have both, I'm way closer to my brother. I do love my sister but we’re super different so hard to be really close. My brother is my best friend.

SabineUndine · 01/09/2018 23:26

My brother’s values, such as they are, are the polar opposite of mine. I have as little to do with him as possible.

BeenThereDone · 01/09/2018 23:27

Middle of three, older and younger brothers.... Always wanted a sister. Feel really jealous of sister relationships. I always thought I would be close to my dsils and I kind of am in a way but they have several sisters of their own so don't get it. My own dps sister S are numerous but I'm not really included there either. I've learned to accept it. I have my friends and one or two would have no sisters so we kind of be that for each other

Couldyoupossiblybeabitquieter · 01/09/2018 23:28

One brother. We're not super close as adults but I can't say I regret not having a sister, as my friends with sisters aren't really super close to them either. (Well, one of my good friends is very close to her sister, but her sister convinced her to emigrate and buy a house with her before ditching her very fast for a man, so that kind of dynamic doesn't appeal either).

Poppy123xyz · 01/09/2018 23:28

My only, younger, brother is my best friend. Never even occurred to me to think about having a sister. We have each others backs

MrsDeanWinchester75 · 01/09/2018 23:28

I have a brother and am nc with him, we never really got on growing up and I always wanted a sister.

We had no similar interests growing up, into different games, wanted to go different places, had separate friends.

Then from my teenage years onwards I was always jealous of close sisters who socialised together.

PurpleNailVarnish · 01/09/2018 23:30

I'm DC 2 with 3 DBs.

I love them but we don't have much contact, unfortunately our parents are very toxic and that's messed up the whole family dynamic.
Our parents have a clear favourite and that's just for starters, I could start many threads about all of it.
Over the years I've given it a lot of thought and I don't think that having sisters instead of brothers would have improved things sadly.

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