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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think you cannot clean the house properly in the daytime if you have a three month old

132 replies

Brownieb · 29/08/2018 02:20

Visited friends today with babies the same age as mine (3 months) and their house was spotless. I would have to regularly spend a whole weekend with my partner cleaning to get the house that clean - breastfeeding is proving really time consuming and I like to be able to interact with baby for a bit of time when she is awake. AIBU to expect some mess from my fellow mums ? Or am I being a bit lazy ?

OP posts:
Losingthewill1 · 29/08/2018 02:26

I think everyone’s house is different, she may just have a very good system in place etc

You could ask her how she does it and teach all of us this magic spell

TroubledLichen · 29/08/2018 02:27

If they’re a good napper then I don’t see why not. I was fortunate enough to have a 3 month old who slept for 1.5-2 hours every afternoon so I would have had plenty of time to keep a 3 bed place clean. That said I hate cleaning and am pretty lazy when it comes to household tasks so I had a cleaner so I could put my feet up and enjoy an actually hot drink during nap time instead. Each to their own though!

MummySparkle · 29/08/2018 02:27

I think some people are better at doing things as they go along which helps (I am not one of these people...)

Is it possible that they tidied because you were visiting?

JennyBlueWren · 29/08/2018 02:29

All babies are different. Maybe theirs love to sit and watch mummy do housework?
Or knowing folk are coming round they spend more time cleaning? I won't have people round when it's messy.
Or maybe they have a cleaner?

I have a three,year old and five month old and dh is sahp and I do get frustrated when I come home to a messy house yet when I'm alone with them I am able to get some housework done.

ISpeakJive · 29/08/2018 02:30

As the above or she’s got a secret cleaner....

Limpshade · 29/08/2018 02:51

My house was pretty tidy with DC1 who liked her own bed. DC2 (also three months) will only nap on me so the place is a pigsty Grin

nurserygames · 29/08/2018 02:58

I was lucky that my dd slept (almost) through the night from a really young age (just luck, my ds doesn't). My house was usually a tip as i didn't get on with baby slings and it could take five attempts to just fully unload a dishwasher! Don't worry too much - it gets easier

Frogpond · 29/08/2018 02:58

I too have a friend with a spotless house, there is no dirt or mess, every cupboard is neat and organised. My children could probably eat for the day off the food on the floor at my place. Don't compare yourself too her, she may have spent two hours cleaning just before you arrived (like I do before guests).

Thomasinaa · 29/08/2018 03:10

Why not? I had a 3 month old, a toddler, ran a business and looked after the house as a single mum. Tiring though.

woodfires · 29/08/2018 03:30

I had a weekly cleaner. Some people are just really good at routines, low clutter and cleaning as they go.

nibblingandbiting · 29/08/2018 03:32

Why not? It doesn't have to take all weekend. It doesn't have to be time-consuming.
Just put things away when you have finished with it. Don't have crap that you don't actually need. Chuck cleaner down the loo every night. The bathroom a quick wipe after a bath/shower. Wipe the kitchen sides as you use them.

I hate housework. I find doing the above minimises what I have to do so I don't feel like I am doing anything.

LaurieMarlow · 29/08/2018 03:44

I don't see why not. I have a 3 month old and I could easily have a spotless house if that was my priority.

abacucat · 29/08/2018 03:47

Depends on the baby. I remember a friend whose baby slept so much that she used to phone me bored saying she had cleaned the house, her baby was still sleeping, and she had nothing to do.

abacucat · 29/08/2018 03:48

Also you are breastfeeding which can take a lot of time. Different if you are bottle feeding.

TheStopAndChat · 29/08/2018 03:53

One baby, it's pretty easy to keep the house nice. Can't say it was a priority for me but not hard.
I think it gets harder the more children you add to the mix with the different ages, needs etc. Still doable but, again, never a priority for me.

sobeyondthehills · 29/08/2018 03:53

My DS was breastfed, but he literally slept for four hours, wake, feed, then sleep for four hours, my flat was spotless.

If I ever have another one, I am fairly sure I am going to be punished with a non sleeping attached baby

SnuggyBuggy · 29/08/2018 03:56

My DD only sleeps in the sling or moving pram during the day. I can do some things with her in a sling but could get down and scrub the floor for example.

hodgeheg92 · 29/08/2018 04:16

It just depends on her scenario and her priorities. Some women in my NCT group will turn up to our gatherings with a full face of make up and curled hair. Some have really clean houses. Some are really caught up on all the great tele at the moment (me!)

Maybe her baby naps, maybe she's bottle feeding, maybe her partner cleans, maybe she has a cleaner. You do what you want to do and just know that caring for your baby is the most important thing to do right now and your house/life/hair will look good again one day!

putputput · 29/08/2018 04:30

My baby napped in the sling at 3months, and I needed to be up moving. My house was spotless. Now...not so much.

Spanglyprincess1 · 29/08/2018 04:35

The last weekend baby screamed constantly and only would nap on me. Zero house cleaning got done. Every momment free I used for sleep!
Today baby slept for two hours in day and I managed to do washing and clean bathroom. Plus prepare meals.
So very very much depends on child and size of house.

timeisnotaline · 29/08/2018 04:38

I have a 3yo and a 3mo, no way can I clean the house! I’m working towards washing and tidy. 3yo is in nursery 2.5 days but 3mo only sleeps for several minutes on alternate nights (slight exaggeration but not really)

argentino · 29/08/2018 04:40

When my babies were young it was a priority for me to keep the house tidy as we spent so much time indoors and it would have really got me down if the place was a mess.

The cleaner came twice a week and I would do my best to maintain it/tidy up as I went along. Plenty of storage space and throwing away useless shit was key.

DazzlingMilton · 29/08/2018 04:41

I've always had a spotless house, it makes me feel like I'm on top of things and I can relax much better when it's tidy. I enjoy our home and put a lot of effort into doing it up so keeping it nice is important to me. I don't judge other people who are different.
I keep it nice because I always clean up as I go, and we always tidy it together before bed so nothing ever gets really bad. I have good routines and shortcuts wherever possible. I have a cleaner one morning a week who does floors, she only does three hours though so even though it's a help it's not so much dh and I couldn't fit in if we didnt have her. I don't iron anything so that saves me time, everything goes in drier and gets folded really well as soon as it's done, I've always been like this though so it was easier to stay this way when dc came.

DazzlingMilton · 29/08/2018 04:42

Plenty of storage space and throwing away useless shit was key.

^^this

Gyoza · 29/08/2018 04:48

I have a 3 month old, my flat is a bit of a state, though I have to admit I’ve always been a bit untidy though... I find the only time I can tidy is if I stay in all day and do it while baby naps, but that’s also when I want to get myself something to eat, cup of tea, put a wash on etc. I tend to focus on cleaning essentials like bathroom and kitchen which means everywhere else ends up neglected.