AIBU to use pub toilet?

[AliceRR]

I am nearly 16w pregnant. Not quite needing to pee all the time but today left the house for a viewing and needed to pee before we got there even though I had peer before I left the house!

DH said ask at the house but I felt cheeky. I was looking for somewhere to stop and use the loo and was getting slightly stressed as I needed to go and we needed to get the viewing.

I stopped at a pub 5 mins before we were due to be at the house but it was v close. Went in and looked toward the bar to ask if I could use the loo. Couldn’t see anyone.

I felt like people were all looking at me when I walked in. It was uncomfortable but I needed to go and I didn’t know who to speak to. I went to the loo. It was a bit shabby but clean enough.

After I came out a woman probably in her forties, who was sitting down with others and had her phone in front of her, said “I bet you 10p she doesn’t”. I asked what she meant. She told me she bet someone 10p I wouldn’t buy a drink. I said I actually don’t have to time stop now as we are on our way to a house viewing but I needed the loo and I was going to ask to use the loo but didn’t know who to ask (how would I have known she was in charge?). She said well you’ve been now. I said yes thanks.

But felt like saying “if you’d bee a bit more gracious DH and I might have stopped in for a drink after we’ve been to the house!”

But I was actually a bit upset by it. I felt bad. I did intend to ask but how would I have known? Maybe I should have stood at the bar?

Was I really rude? Or were they a bit rude? Maybe a bit of both. I really felt like they were all staring at me. It was quite unpleasant.

YWNBU, you're pregnant, needs must. Are you obviously pregnant, because if not I would have told the woman and explained.

Am I understanding right that that she was the landlady/staff member in charge? If so, she was being U – and setting you up to fail –sitting like a customer and waiting for you to get yourself in trouble, as it were, rather than making clear who she was and saying could she help you.

Yanbu sometimes you got to do what you need to do. Would these people who are saying yabvu, be happy if you peed in a bush, don't think so.

Op did not have time to stop for a drink, she was in a rush.

I always thought that pg women and children were given amnesty over toilets.
Just say "I know I'm being a cheekster but I'm pg can I use the loo"?
Who will refuse you

A community place refused me when I was 35weeks pg. Apparently being pregnant doesn’t give you right to pee 🤷‍♀️

YWNBU.
The pub has done itself out of further business. I own a business and I'd have said, "are you ok? Brill, hope to see you here again soon when you have more time, have a good day"
She cut her nose off to spite her face in being rude to you.

I’ve used a pub loo without buying anything, I was walking home after a marathon session at the hair salon. I thought I’d be able to hold on until I got home but it was no good I had to go. It was a Saturday lunchtime and the pub was quite busy but I couldn’t see anyone to ask. No one said anything.

YANBU to use the loo, what else could you have done?

Yabu, I use pub toilets when I need to if driving somewhere but always ask (unless I am in a desperate hurry ) and put a donation (50p) in a charity box if there is one on the bar or say to bar staff put it in the staff tips. It's worth it to me that I have found somewhere to park and somewhere to pee.

Sorry, Yanbu for using a pub loo but I think you went about it the wrong way.

Your pregnant think you can legally request a police mans hats to pee in!!

Goodness me some of these replies!!

YANBU. You're pregnant and needed a wee. She was very rude.

You'd have been better off to profusely apologise, state you are pregnant and offer to buy some crisps or something. It's not a public toilet and it's very annoying for pub and cafe owners.

YANBU. Only because I did this 2 days ago and Im not even pregnant.but have piss poor bladder control due to 2 pregnancies. We travelled 3 hours to buy a car, was absolutely bursting by the time we got there to find out the garage didnt have a toilet. So I nipped 30 secs down the road to use the toilet in the neighbouring pub. Didnt buy anything because I had to drive three hours back home. I dont feel bad. In fact i felt extremely relieved :D :D :D

I always buy something - a bag of crisps or a soft drink. Just to be polite. I remember my dad always doing this if we needed to stop in a country pub on a road trip - said it was the decent thing to do.

And this is why the Brits have a poor reputation for hospitality.
No OP, YWNBU.

Pubs are going out of business in their hundreds, so you were being a bit U not to at least buy a packet of crisps. But I think big businesses like MacDonalds are fair game - there are so few public toilets left.

Those people saying that anyone using a toilet like this is only for paying customers have clearly never experienced debilitating bowel or bladder problems which mean they might need a toilet urgently, whatever the reason.

Good grief it really doesn’t matter and isn’t worth worrying about after the event. I’m 34 weeks pregnant and never had any comments about using businesses toilets. If I did I would shrug it off, I’m not gonna pee myself to avoid a sarcastic comment.

She said well you’ve been now. I said yes thanks

As long as you didn't say "I'd give it ten minutes if I was you" then you're fine.

Peeing in a policeman's helmet - that'll be a stern 'No' .

Do you think it is fair that she was paying for your toilet paper and water?
I don’t see how it’s different from using the customer loo in a shop but not buying anything. If I’m out shopping I’ll pop into M&S to use the loo, for example. Is it cheeky that M&S paid for my loo roll but I didn’t buy anything?

Although she shouldn't have said anything, I always buy something if I use the loo. Even if it's a pack of gum. It at least shows the proprietor that you realize their facilities are for customers and that you don't really want to take advantage, you just really have to wee.

I was setting off for a walk and went to a pub and asked to use the loo. I then bought a couple of packets of crisps.
Doesn't have to be a drink.

Bigbluebubble yes it would have been cheeky if you had gone in there just to use the loo with no intention of buying anything.