18 year old taking 12 year old on 4 trains aibu?

[lilypoppet]

Without asking me,.my DH, Mil and 18 year old daughter have organised for the 18 year old to take my 12 year old daughter to Lincolnshire on their own. We live on West Sussex. This involves a long journey of 4 trains, including underground across London. I must stress DH isn't.going with them and I have not.been asked. I don't even know which station they'll.be picked up from. I have been given no information. They have already bought the tickets. What can I do?

Or drive them to Victoria and stick them on a coach.

The tube stations.are.full of nutters and I was on a tube train on the day of.then 7/7 bombings. This is.not a.walk in the park journey.

well, its perfectly understandable that you have an irrational fear of tube trains then.

There have been millions and million and millions of perfectly safe, rather boring tube train journeys since then.

I’m sorry you were using the tubes in 7/7. But so we’re millions of us and we have to get on the tube every single day. It is not full of nutters. It really really isn’t. It’s full of ordinary people going from A-B and not in the slightest bit interested in causing any kind of grief to anyone. We all wanna get home.

A train to London, across London to another station and then another Train really is really is straightforward. It is a walk in the park.

Millions of people were there too on 7/7 myself included. And yes it is a fairly routine journey for an adult and young person

I don’t understand what the problem is. 🤷🏻‍♀️

When DS1 was 18 he went on a lads holiday to Malia. I think I’d have preferred him to have taken a trip to Cleethorpes with DS2.

Most kids are at uni at 18 and not living at home. If they want to come back for a few days the vast majority use the train. This will be good practice

Well, you could ask which station they're being picked up from if you want, but other than that, I can't see that there's much you need to do. Relax and be grateful that your family are capable of organising themselves.

My DD took the tube every day to school from age 11. It will be fine. Also 18yo DD1 takes DD3 (8yo) by tube and then train to visit their Grandma.

But I get that you are anxious and not happy about these arrangements. I think the best thing that you can do is let this one go and let them get on with it. Do you get anxious about a lot of different things?

Bloody hell, OP. Get a grip.

Easy to avoid the tube if they want to - change at Gatwick and get the Thameslink service up to Kings Cross. But seriously, the Victoria line is fine.

I'd say there are as many nutters in Lincolnshire as on the tube actually!

You need to stop being so over protective and ridiculous. When I was 15 I took my 5 brothers aged 3, 5, 8, 11 and 13 to Jamaica which involved a 7 hour stop over in New York where our flight was cancelled and we were forced to wait at the airport for 23 hours. We were fine, even thou there were no mobile phones and we were not register as unaccompanied minors as it cost more. Relax, they'll be fine.

How can it not be a walk in the park there are kids doing these trips daily and one of yours is an adult ?
You could be at risk of terrorists any where any place so that’s a very bizarre worry and how would you been there with them if you went with them change that ?

Can I just say - OP millions of us were on the tubes and buses on 7/7. You just have to get on with life. No reason to let this make you so irrationally anxious.

Have they bought tube tickets with their overground tickets?

If they've booked straight through from Chichester to Cleethorpes, the tube journey is included in the tickets. If they've booked Chich-Vic then KX-Clth on separate tickets, it won't be.

Oh ffs, it's an "I hate my mil" thread.
That's the backstory.

OP. Just be thankful you don't actually have to see your mil at any point and stop being silly. Of course it's a "walk in the park" journey.

OP 5 million people were on a tube the day of the 7/7 bombings. And it was 10 years ago! Sorry but you are sounding quite pathetic tbh

You say that they were born and bred in London and are used to the tube, so I don’t see the issue at all.

You say it’s the tube thing and then you say you’d be fine if they were being picked up in Doncaster.

It’s all a bit muddled. Is this all to do with your MIL?

I bet you it will be the 12 year old dc who will probably figure the tube map first & 12year old dc are experts on mobile phones! if your worried just get them to text you each bit of the journey (imagines dc eyes turned upwards saying "oh mummmm!")they will be fine

OP 5 million people were on a tube the day of the 7/7 bombings. And it was 10 years ago!

10 years ago? That makes me feel so old

The tube journey is about 5 stops on the line which has the most frequent service - apart during the day , so they’ll have absolutely no need to rush anywhere . I do get why you’re concerned , bearing in mind your experience , and yes there is the odd ‘ character ‘ on there , but there’s also many many more good people who won’t hesitate to step in and help your DD’s if they look like they need it ( although I suspect your 18 year old , in fact probably your 12 year old too , are perfectly capable of sorting any issues out ) . Come to that I’ve seen plenty of parents put young teens alone on my trains from Kings Cross to Norfolk , and I always keep an eye on them , as do others .

It’s not a difficult journey . Really . Long and boring possibly , but not difficult . They can always ring you as they get onto each train if it would help your peace of mind .

Tube stations are full of nutters commuters, tourists and tube staff.

Presumably if they’re coming from Sussex it will be Victoria to King’s Cross? Ridiculously easy journey.

as far as I know, the legl age for using the tube lone is 5 years old - that is the age you can get your first oyster card for independent travel, anyway. I don't know anyone who has done this but certainly know 8 and 9 year old's who tube to and from school alone. It is normal by age 11.

It was actually 13! 2005